#572 – Openness, Mindfulness & Culture/
- January 9, 2020
We chat about Kevin Hart’s Don’t F*ck This Up, openness and radical honesty, the impact of culture on how you show up, and the questions for our Facebook Group.
On today’s episode of The Daily Talk Show, we discuss:
– Kevin Hart’s Don’t F*ck This Up
– Openness and radical honesty
– Culture & how you live
– Facebook Group questions
– Friday Night Drinks
Email us: firstname.lastname@example.org
Send us mail: PO BOX 400, Abbotsford VIC 3067
The Daily Talk Show is an Australian talk show and daily podcast by Tommy Jackett and Josh Janssen. Tommy and Josh chat about life, creativity, business, and relationships — big questions and banter. Regularly visited by guests and gronks! If you watch the show or listen to the podcast, you’re part of the Gronk Squad.
This podcast is produced by BIG MEDIA COMPANY. Find out more at https://bigmediacompany.com/
It's the daily Talk Show Episode 572 what's happening guys what's going on? We're just having a bit of a laugh at Kevin Hart
and he's a he's new doc Oh series what's the cold something don't fuck this up. It's good it's Yeah, I mean
fair to say fuck it up
is fact a lot up he's a guy that leans into his honesty I don't know if it's until he gets caught me like
what's the other up what up she says
he's got no other option he's life is a full on movie like what's happened to him? It's not that there's been overly tragic but he's just the Uber success from zero is amazing and I can't like I watch it and I go through this moment of like, He's a fucking egomaniac. He's a narcissist to lie. Look at the self belief. I fucking love this guy. Like, yeah, I'm pumped. I want to be 16 As far
as my whole lot of 29 I think there is a level of judgement from you know, the people who aren't in the arena like he is at that level actual arenas actually. Because I it's like whether it's tall poppy syndrome or something where I'm just like someone who is so confident in their in what they do and and the moves they're making and where they want to go. And then you kind of it's like you do want to like this back and chill out a bit
blows up because so the tall poppy thing if he didn't have all of the things happen, so the controversy would there still be the tall poppy?
Yeah, I think I think when you getting a glimpse into their world, like through dokgo series, that's where I that's where the on the panel of judges like I'm saying I've recognised the judgement I cast and then I'm trying to like step back from him to go, you know, because I'm writing motions of judgement then like love. It's like, it's this weird thing that I think a lot of people do unconsciously. So I'm just like, trying to do that consciously. But he does do some very outrageous things like how he wears his AirPods. in conversations
in meetings, the only thing is air pods on the last like three hours of battery.
He's got some from Apple that have just super powered air pods. Yeah.
Always, always. I'm just trying to work out how you do it. Could you have multiple pairs attached to an iPhone that could easily be used? I don't know. That's
a good point. I mean, he's got an assistant with him all the time. He's got people around him. He's got a crew around him and he's made so he's brought up with it he's worked
That's why I like seeing the generosity of him and the honesty with him. I listened to a podcast, Aubrey Marcus, who owns honours, the Academy in the protein supplements and supplements. Anyway want to Joe Rogan's He was in an open relationship. And they broke up
and then he went so conveniently when he he also went off sex. He's that guy. He's that guy. Yeah, he quit sex for a while. But he still has or maybe
now, he his ex girlfriend. The person that he was with that didn't last long. Yeah. Anyway, I've listened to this podcast of him and he's part ex partner. And they were talking about the whole experience and how that guy but I was like, What do you think about relationships is not the point of this. He's honesty, and the ability to talk about what he's feeling and communicate that is inspiring for me. For this year, I want to
be more open.
I want to be able to speak
my Come on, use your words,
and be able to share more that I would usually keep in because I see it as something that is powerful, and sorry. I had this moment where I was when I was listening this podcast I was like, for I mean, I when we first got together, I, I just me hadn't had as many passages as I have. She had zero, and then met me. So I'm the one and then I'd had a different past more explorative it'd be been a bit like, a bit like, What's his name? Levison bit
sexual history to be honest,
but I'm just saying adventurous. And so I kept things from her. It's not it's not lying. It's actually so it's like, just not just withholding information, because I didn't think that she could handle it or whatever it was, right. So I made that decision number. But then I was thinking man I was like, by that's exercising muscle by leaving in things that I thinking about and, and
also yours, so you're hiding part of yourself.
Yeah, no guilt in that. And so one of the things is here is, I've got a rule that I have to talk to me about whatever is on my mind if I am thinking something, or is
that why when you're on the beach, and you looked at that person to ask, you said, I'm looking at her, and
I told her, I looked at someone's ass
that I did, and I, I mean, she's like, why doesn't shit?
Because I'm honest. And I'm like, I think she's ready for it. And so yes, yes, yes.
That's, that's also why I want to lean into it. But it's also the other reason is that, I think it's training the muscle. It's not training muscle by keeping it all in, in relation to anything that you when you're in a relationship. How do you go with? I mean, you're very open and talk your thoughts. Probably too much sometime. Yeah, sure.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, I think I'm pretty honest that the fighting will soar. old mate, Craig Harper. A post where it because we talked about radical honesty. Did you say this post? Yeah,
he's like, yeah, have you just listened to it? 42 Well, the thing
is, he's like, hearing all people talk about radical honesty. That's probably like, fucking bullshit. Is it? You're being honest, or being dishonest.
So, can you find this because it's a post recently? Yeah. Yeah, one of the last Here we go.
Radical honesty. This is a term I've heard quite a few times recently. And I find it weird. Weird because radical honesty infers that there are levels of honesty. A bit honest, pretty honest, more honest, very honest, and radically honest. Seemingly the most honest. Call me old fashioned. But back in the day we dinosaurs use use. Use these two Grand Bay breaking terms. Honest and dishonest. That's it. Sorry.
What about this to challenge Craig? Because he's not here. It's always good. He's not here. Yeah. One of the things I guess that we're learning and societies that we have different masks. And so potentially with a different masks comes different honesty systems or different filters that we use. And so the question becomes what is honesty? What are our thoughts? If you think something, do you believe that?
Not necessarily if you're thinking about a belief and so something something, then there's a level of mindfulness to to identify that thought is a part of your belief system.
And so sometimes our thoughts in congruent with our system like our operate or like, our our belief system, Yes, right. So we might think something that's actually doesn't really align well with who we are as a person. So if we're honest about that thought We are communicating a thought that is out of alignment with how we feel we want to be. And so I guess the question can then be do we want to then put ourselves out there? If it's that, what did Jason Fox talk about? He talks about pre, pretending, pretending. So it's like pre tending. If you if you say something, if you say your thought, does it actually make it more real is that always get off
of making the thoughts in our heads real by verbalising them?
Yeah. So if you have a thought, potentially you can say that is just a thought. That isn't my belief system. I don't believe that thing. And so I'm not going to communicate it out loud because when I communicate it out loud, the verbalization is through my belief system, potentially.
So then you go, like the, the emotional response behind some when you hear something like open relationships or You can, you can be quick to judge based on how it makes you feel based on your and how it would apply to you in your life. Right. And then so that emotive response and then the thought of what does that mean for me? Does that does that that form is the belief right? So you got the thinking but also the emotional feeling within you then sort of backs up something but So essentially,
if you're thinking something and not saying it, you still saying it through maybe other actions? I mean, yeah, shame through books. Yeah,
but maybe, I mean, we're not talking about just like, how much random shit like I felt like once, I would just want to punch him in the head. But I don't really want to. I was never gonna, before you've said it before, though. In my life, I've said to someone, I'll punch in the head.
Yeah. Or I want to punch in there.
And then I have punched him in the head said that's not me anymore, but it's like the thoughts the the darkest stuff where you're like, if I push this person right now or I grab the policeman's gun right now,
like these are these are just like random shit going on that you never act on. So there's like, a willpower or something going inside you that, that your moral system acting and and so when there's heaps of people around just start to think about like how much destruction could happen in that if there was a bomb or something went off how many people would like to and that is not of like, I guess prime through the media right you know like, like I saw on the news like all these people like people getting run over by a car like fuck I mean like a big group of people like I mean when better should happen like say I've I've done that I've been in New York City and thought fuck magine if something happened,
I wonder if there's people where something has happened where they're thinking fact matters, something happened right now and then something happens.
What have I got? there's a there's a term for that. It's the basically where you we have like a MIT like having many thoughts 60 something failure and so so Sometimes those thoughts come to fruition. And it's like the bias. It's something bias. But basically like we have all these, it's like the whole thing around
confirmation bias and looking for signs that connect to the thought in the moment. Exactly. So I
1000 things happen in a day or whatever. And so, if you have one thought that matches up, you're like, Oh, look, there, we got this confirmation bias. Is that what it is? What is confirmation bias?
And there's, like the power of thoughts. So if you if you are having a bunch of negative thoughts that that a just flying into your brain flying into sort of your consciousness it, it doesn't, it can be different, right.
Do you allow in your mind, Amy to have a negative response to things that you're saying? Honestly, I can't
control her response.
Yeah, I cannot continue. Do you think About that, because I guess there is a you see people being like, Oh no, I'm just super honest. Like, you know, people, like bullies or whatever, right? They're like I you know, I'm just like a real honest person. Just like that. It's like, Oh, no, you're just an asshole. Yeah, yeah. And so there is a there's a reason why we hold things back. Because it can hurt. Like, if I think something about someone. I have a choice whether I say it, or I don't say it. If I am. Is it selfish to say, Okay, I'm just gonna say everything. So it's not inside. I don't think
when I, when I say that, without me, I'm telling her what I'm thinking. It's
it's still a thrill.
It's not a stream of thought. It's more. What would I normally not mentioned to her in a moment that she may ask? What's going on? What do you think? Yeah, sure. And so it's more going I can't tell you my thoughts every moment because there's so many rant so much random shit. Think about when you guys have been doing the meditation, the random shit that comes into your brain. Yeah. Like last night I thought about something that happened so long ago. And I was like, how did that come in? Anyway, I acknowledge it and moved on. And then another thought came in, and then I got back to sort of being a bit more focused, and then random shit. So it's not about just every random moment, it's about acknowledging the times where you go, I would keep this where I could share it, and I want and so then you build the muscle around holding it back. And so my thing to this year is like, honesty more so that serves the whole thing and being open. It's like it's not even its its openness rather than honesty. If that makes Yeah.
And and I think that it potentially requires people to be ready like not everyone's going to be. Not everyone likes openness. Yes, there's people like farting Bunch people who now don't talk about fasting are na, na, one star cancelled. No fasting, no talk of fasting here. That's like if you can't accept I said it, you now chat with Dave Allah. It's like if you're having a relationship far too early, because you want to bring the friction forward because 97 where there's friction, there's traction.
But that is a belief that you have. And so the thing around the open relationship stuff is the belief can be, I think it's okay to be in open relationships. The opposite is that I don't like that doesn't work for anybody. So there's their true beliefs that are pretty firm, which makes you think that there is alternative approaches to life and so whenever I think and even so it's like, going, it's okay for me to feel uncomfortable about them who do that thing. But there's also like, acknowledge that and have a look at it. So let's actually have a conversation about it
potentially. I do think that have you changed much as a person the last two years do you think our shitloads
I think a Hape? Do you think that you become more empathetic to others? Because if you look at yourself two years ago, do you see yourself as a different person? Or what do
you definitely different definitely different person? Was I less empathetic? Probably. But I don't I don't it's a weird because you looking at them and looking back at yourself as a different person. So you like, how like, what was going on there? Why did I? Why was I? I can't remember thinking why I did when you have a new system or a new approach to life. We feel if you get
stock mode on the phone, the dark mode, is that what it's called?
Yeah, yeah, I think so.
Because all these things just become a thing. So yeah, like we've always been able to do this. Yeah.
Good. Take. Take care. Technology take analogy. No, I definitely.
So do you think you'd become empathetic of other people? Because like, I didn't know my, I didn't know this two years ago. So why should I expect this person to? Yeah.
I'm sorry. I wasn't even really listening to that. But I was thinking, goodness, openness.
So like this. Oh,
I tell you what there's like starting the mindfulness stuff is like in the it's ironic, because ironic enough the throat word. Yeah, I'm waking up the app, which is Sam Harris's app waking up. I feel like I've woken up. There's not been a woke. That's not being.
It's not being woke.
But it is one step as soon as you try hard and not being consumed by the thoughts. just fly into your head and start more observing what's happening and why I'm feeling that way and having this kind of a conversation. It's almost like you can't go back because you're so you're so not obsessed. But you can't not think about why you're having these thoughts and why you're experiencing, like, so there's this step to the side, which makes me feel like, that's why I'm like, I don't know if I'll ever stop. I don't, I won't ever stop meditating. Because I can't remember the old guy and what he used to fucking do when he was constantly trapped, I still am. So it's not like some new, some fucking paradise over here, but it is like, what was I doing two years ago, when I was having blow up with like, I just wasn't as conscious about the whole thing.
And so that if you look at identity, how do you avoid, say from an identity point of view? It's pretty common that like blokes lead with like, you know, they know it all. They want to fix everything. They've got all the answers. There's like, the reason that I want to read up on Iran is so that when in some sort of obscure conversation where someone says something about an article they read, yeah, I can be like, was actually because of the blah blah blah this happened in that and so I identify that identify that the nodal in me wants to know all about Iran purely for the one time that I'm in the Persian restaurant. And I can mention every dish I can tell them how that method
yeah I mean there's so deeper I because there's the path you go down as to why you even think like that. Then there's the path to go down of. Okay, but what's behind that don't even like there's there's not much that I want to learn and so I'm using it as a mechanism and my god this is a fun like some people learn to use a yo yo, do yo yo tricks on magic. Like why do people want magic? They said there's like psycho analysis where you could probably find, you know, going to a psycho analysis. What's the what are they called a psycho analysis, but someone who can perform psycho analysis on you which would to Adam cover all these things about why you act the way you do based on past experiences, it could be because you need it. I don't know this this all this damage all this shit that I don't know, is that practical. You're an interesting one because I think you're super self aware. But there's the self awareness that you've done the piece of work to realise and be able to verbalise and be open about you being that guy that loves that, because that's like, Cassandra, then I could say, is it positive for you? Do you think well, that's the whole
thing. I'm aware, but I still do it. Like this. And so that's like the meta modernism stuff, right? That's what like Jason Fox talks about is like you're entering in and out of different states.
But so he's becoming like, the hard thing about even being aware of it is and not acting on changing and if it isn't positive for you, it still then becomes identity for you. Yeah, but but I guess
maybe what I'm trying to do is not to create a perfect being I think that potentially if you know all these things, if you find all these gotchas, like, are you doing it because of this and doing because of that? And like, where do you end up? And so maybe like without the whole masks type thing, and like, not looking at everything black and white, and being a bit grey, maybe there is something of I'm doing this because of this identity thing, which is okay, and it actually like identity serves me. And so what I find interesting around the whiteness thing is just the general idea of imagine moving more, what is that a? Is that a symptom of the next layer of Noah totalism, which is like nominalism. I don't think I just made that word up here, but so like the, if you think about it. If you're a nodal and you've identified potentially that you people think you're an hour Being woke, or having saying I realised I was this person. And now I'm something different is the ultimate palette move? because now you're like, ah, like I'm, I'm aware of that or whatever. But it could potentially come from the same identity which is the nodal because I woke kness and being woken doing all of that is a is a toolkit. And so it's like, oh, look, I nailed all of this toolkit. Now I'm going to do the spiritual toolkit because once I've spent enough time in that
I think all that's happened in that moment is someone acting unconsciously they're become conscious of their acting unconscious Lee,
but the thing is, that may be because they because the thing is like it just become conscious to this one little layer, but you know, the thing is that there isn't conscious and unconscious. Because just zooming out a tiny bit. You could then look at it as like Consciousness I become, yes, maybe we become more conscious. But we haven't became conscious. So I said, let's say mine mindless and mindful. Probably the right words to strip back the conscious and unconscious, maybe less mindless,
less mindless, but I think the thing is that even what I say is like, creating some framing around my thoughts on the thing, right? Name and identity, you step back from them because there's another layer. So you're right, the onion does get stripped back, but that is where these Buddhist medicine minute like meditation does take you down that path to to nothing. You're trying to strip it all back.
But my Noah totalism is doing something now, which is basically a gotcha because if you come back, like if you think about the conversation, if you say anything, I can use that as the framing of what you just know. You know, everything right. And so it's a very hot debate.
We're talking about ourselves, right? We're not talking about others. I think, if you want to know yourself, you should like you should that you should lean into that, because I don't think it's but what is out there?
And so I guess what is ourselves? I think the more that we think about ourself, the more we think about culture. What is that culture? So like, you look at using the Iran example, whatever, because I'm an expert. Asked me anything. Jay counted those books, by the way. The if you think about culture, and you look at like media, and then you see like, Okay, this perspective, I guess what I'm trying to do potentially, is enter into another perspective, enter into if I was of this if I grew up in this way, if I was born this way, what would my perspective actually be?
Which, which is yourself so you're saying like, what has been the cultural influences to form the thing that identifies myself
and said the thing Is that the there is so much power in differences or identifying what the differences are. Because the way that you approach life and the way that I approach life has differences based on our upbringing, and where we went to school and who our friends were, and the things that we were taught and the and so all of that, like, it's very confusing.
But yeah, I mean, that's building this building yourself to how you identified your thought process and giving reason to all the the rethinking come from it's happening without our control.
And so if you don't like so if it's happening without our control, then what is thinking? Ah, dude,
thanks for asking me I'm actually
well versed on that No, no, what is
right? I don't know.
So if we go back to year 12 it which I failed by the way cuz I didn't do my fuckin Excel sack my spreadsheet sack, but you did informatics. No, I did it. But they had a section which was like, it's an old spreadsheet what
happened in this that could contribute to this?
garbage in garbage out information, right. So it's like if you put in bad information, you get bad information out. If you have all these experiences, you're if you're like, I'm just unconscious to things, things just happen. It's like a gut instinct is gut instinct, not just memory bank of everything that has happened. So if I'm crossing the road, and a car starts to speed up, I should run so I don't get heat. Where do we learn that?
So what's your thought around?
So the thing is, it's like we do we wait that's information that we understand that I don't know how much thinking know, but so from a thinking perspective, what is thinking? And if it's, if we're not thinking we ask Still thinking, just from a, whether it's conscious or unconscious, like our actions, so if all the things that have ever happened to us, brings us to a point of who we are and what we are in our identity. And so I guess it's just I don't know, man, it's a bit of a rabbit hole. I just, I mean, the thought thing, but so the thing is, so part of is like, it just is like, I don't know why I do this thing, but it just is. Who says that? Like, I don't know, just say if that's if that's, that's if that's an approach, or like, like, I'm not I'm not really thinking about it. I'm just doing. There are a bunch of things that are happening that are informing how you're responding. And that's, we don't know of course, yeah. Yeah. It's, what do you think sets?
neural pathways? Yeah, well, passwords. Yeah, bunch of them.
Yeah, I mean, it's just a your thinking is probably just a collection of everything that you've experienced in And been through and I don't know about the whole like the the instinctive thing versus thinking about it like the with the car crossing the road. Yeah, I don't know that that's just like a an unconscious thing that happens. It's just like something running in the background that whether you pick that up and learned that from somewhere or
whether it's learning I think about bardy I'm teaching him Yes. He doesn't have any understanding that if he goes on the road, he will get hit by a car. Yeah. And so you start drilling it into them and so then they start making the connection, but then that's going to be never thought about again, it just is
when the thing is some people could have a crazy response like so people who say there's people who jaywalking there's people who are who don't die walking back, I just cross the road while you're doing. It's probably because I nearly got hit by a car when they'll find a deal.
the other option
that they just had the lights, they just stay at the Do the they do the analysis like everyone else, but it's just based on the reality of standing in front of a car you get hit you die based on the understanding of that.
The understanding of that is
likely actually like they're like, What the What's happened to them? And they'll like it, how do you understand risk? And like, like, it may not have been a car but it could have been a train or could have been like fucking hide. So whatever it is, those things that have happened is still going to inform where we see risk. If we grow up every single weekend going and climbing rocks, then our the way that we look at rock climbing is potentially less risky. I know what you're saying.
But then so with kids, like there are some friends of bowties that are terrified of the slides. And they're so young, like they haven't had much experience. Like and there's been no huge accident. So there is like it's the nature in the child as well.
It can contribute. So it's like, I don't even joke about like generational trauma so like people who been through the Holocaust and all that sort of thing and then they look at their family members and say that the trauma actually go through James. So I don't know if I can understand it. Yeah, I mean, where am I know it? Oh,
no, I get what you're trying to get at with the car thing. But yeah, it's so like, because there's like what you said generational trauma, this understanding of things that have happened to you in your past.
But so then the interesting thing, I guess, is like, does it all lead just to empathy? So understanding that if we can't even identify it if we don't know the memories or the things that have the the unconscious actions that happened throughout throughout our life, how would everyone else know and how would we know what their experiences
what's a serving the like, what he
wants to see?
But so where are you realising the empathy to this
so the just in the in the sense
If we like we never arrive. So we never like so speaking in, like, absolutes, of like, I used to be this way, and now I'm this way or things like that. I guess it's just avoiding absolutes in some way because
it's hot bitties they serve you as well, in some respects the same with the identity stuff, right? Like,
yeah, you can be conscious of it and conscious that I do this thing. Yeah, then if we're interacting with other people realising that they're operating system is different, and they've been going through different, different things.
I had this conversation with Craig and I mentioned to you it's like, I see the sort of the cliff you step off into that spiritual world where you take it, take it really seriously, but if it does consume you, and all this stuff, all these constructs, they don't mean anything, right? We give it the meaning. And so you can see how it's like it's a slippery slope to nothing because There's nothing in this. I mean, all of this is nothing really. But in reality, there's bills to pay jobs to get we all need to sort of leave alive, which
is culture, which is Yeah. Do you think like, because if you think about it like this, of course, but there's other there's other countries
where it's simple living in the mountains in India that are super happy and they're having one meal a day. And like, that doesn't mean
so that's so I guess the thing is the unconscious version of ourselves, if the unconscious version of ourselves is rocking up to work, paying our bills, doing all that sort of thing is I don't know if it's
so there is the unconscious version of that, but you can be conscious about the fact that is something you need to do in your life. We need to have a roof over our head, if we want to have some level of
also Yeah, this is the universe. I guess there's those universal
By the way, maybe you can look at this for yourself, and go The intensity and the focus you put on the future of developing your, your world and what we're doing in the show. What does that even mean? Like, why do you choose to sort of pursue that? Why? Why does it need an intensity? Why does it sometimes need anxiety? Why, you know, as well as all the great stuff that happens a lot of it like
body that that's the that's the that's the mechanism of entering in to things and then out of things. So if you don't have if you're like, you know what, like, I'm detached to outcome. You're always detached to outcome, would you do anything? So if you've got no real focus, yeah, like from it, you do
a bunch of stuff. So the focus on other stuff based on so But hang on, the detached from outcome is removing the emphasis on what it gives you what you get at the end of doing something and so they reason there is a life to live that isn't that and thinking about that happiness or whatever you think will bring you and living in this, which is either the moment, like actually enjoying and being grateful and, and being present with them every moment that can bring an extreme level of happiness and all the other. Like, there needs to be a framework still. Because if you I guess from a if you if you are detached from an outcome, and you just be present and do things unconsciously or whatever it is, is that what you think like is it uncaught like but I think this app if and I don't think I'm consciously I think it's being just living in consciousness and experiencing and I mean, who we talking about here we talking about just someone who's
doing it myself. I'm trying to frame it myself and one that I think it's just
being more present.
And because the thing is, I guess if you from the outcome perspective, You're detached from out from the outcome. Does that mean that you just end up playing the finite games of everyone else's outcome
now and said, this is where I'm saying it's a slippery slope to just live a life of zero outcome because there is all the things like rent and food and life that we want to live. And so we should have balance construct, right, which is that which is the interesting thing is like So what you're saying is, it's like, no, but I'm talking about realities like just from success and buying a house I'm talking about having any money to survive in this
world and he is a construct Oh,
yeah, I know that but stop trying to outsmart But not only that, but I'm just
literally saying that like the thing about realities, if you're saying no, but just the reality is, there's multiple realities. But if you were to look at
just even existing in Melbourne for you, so the
culture thing, so it's like what do within the reality of Melbourne and what it means to have this identity living in Collingwood have this Life. It means I can buy maka Master?
No. It doesn't it doesn't know. So this is the jumping from living a life of zero outcome to, oh, I think you're jumping way over here, which then just like Fox up this conversation about having someone living alive living your life now with less outcome driven, and what would that mean to you? So if there was no outcome, what would you be doing? There's no outcome focus.
So whilst there might not be a long term outcome, there is the every day like one of the things that I want to do every day that brings a little bit of light into my life or the people around me. And in some ways, that's, that's an outcome based on the day. Yeah. So I think potentially what you're talking about, which I agree with, and what I've implemented is like, I'm way less I have sort of an idea of potentially, maybe where things could go. But I understand that it's coming from the window in which I'm standing right now. And realising that as we walk along a hallway, we might actually, throughout all the years of the hallways is a representation of the years we've lived, it could be a completely different view. And if I base an outcome decision, based on what I'm saying, Now, I might be missing the whole other thing. And so then what can you do is you can look at the very small outcome of getting one step in front of the other. So you're walking along, this is being present with
where you're at the moment which is But then I also think the hard thing for me is wanting to be present but also wanting to live a life that I am more confident like this satisfaction, like there's all these constructs, if you're going to call it that, that basically On
like geography would like using geography as an example, living in Melbourne. There's ponder that. Yeah, well anyway, right? Well, the interesting thing is like there's a lot of similarities in culture. If you were to go from Melbourne to a completely different place, right, completely cold, like culturally very different, your version of the step in front of the other or the daily thing could be very different. Which I think is why geography like where we choose to live, if we have the privilege of being able to peek away we live can determine all the other things
are hundred percent taking job in Melbourne, I wouldn't be here doing this podcast with you because I was living in Sydney. And so there's little moments.
And I guess that's part of it is it's like so we can't just say I'm just going to live my life and just do what I have to do. Like I'm going to be detached from outcome but the willingness to recognise that I know like, I've chosen to live here and do all this sort of thing, which, like, it's almost like I've accepted the game, the game I'm willing to play. And now I'm just going to play the game. And I think that potentially there is a
I mean, yeah, it's so it's so tricky, because you see the people that have put everything into a career made a lot of money. And then they go on the pursuit of comfort or the pursuit of now outcome after the after that fact. Right, yeah. And so, yeah, I think it is like the game is a good analogy, because that's what I struggle with if it all is a main match, but we also where you need to be where is the game, so don't worry if I'm not doing this, I have to do something. Because other than what
well I guess part of it becomes so say like, the goal of being a great dad is that something resonates with you being a great dad,
not goal of being great dad, I want to be a great dad. Yeah,
I hope I am. So what? And so then I guess from a cultural point of view, there is a construct of what it what it means to be great dad. I
think it's pretty murky.
So this is the whole thing, right? And so it's like, that's where the culture start. Like in some societies, being a great dad means cash yet being at work, getting everything done, so that you can keep your family going and, and being a support for other people. It's for other cultures, that's being home and being present, doing all that sort of thing. And so that's where we're, I guess, geography and culture. Actually, if you aren't conscious of those things, we end up just, we end up picking a game, potentially, I don't know.
It was all coming back to mindfulness, to be honest, like, because most people are within the game. They've got a job they're trying to provide the arena place they might not want to be there. Then it's if you can understand that and have some level of because if you're not have if you can't find this is hard because there's people in very tricky situations. But if you can't find some peace in this moment of where you're at, why why is it going to be? I don't know, I don't, it's not going to be over here at some other version that you think that you want to be at.
So what happens if like so say if you're someone very different, or you are different to what you were two years ago? What happens with the decisions you made two years ago that that creates the situation that you're in now.
So for instance, I'm living I'm living them. Yeah, I'm living the decisions I made. It's, if I want to,
I need to raise we always need to be constantly like pointing the compass to make sure that we're going In the right I guess it comes with some moves anyway. I can take
just like you need to be making sure that you're going in the right direction. Because if you're like if if we say okay I'm not going to be doing x y&z now I'm just gonna live we're essentially like just selecting the game, maybe we always select it were using we're saying, you know what like these three things that I did like where I'm going to live the friends I hang out with all that.
But I mean how are you looking back on the last two years or looking back two years to the decisions you made then and if you do feel different about them as a person now, you don't have to make those decisions again. It can be shifting the compass for yourself, where is it? And if it was off before, where you think it's off where you are now you think it was off back then there is some difference in you. You can then realign. That's why we are not who we were two years ago and you don't have to be that person anymore. We have an opportunity every day to be a new version. a better version of more aligned version is take some thinking and in turn it on mindfulness around it
serves anyone in Facebook group.
Ms says it's also a choice I moved to the Gold Coast from Melbourne but people say you're so lucky but they could do it too. It's all choice and weighing it up. You can actually leave Melbourne and have a low wage but a happier life etc.
love excuted Derek's also pumped he said pods arrived today 15 bucks so that definitely
box yeah wonder what they like quality one bloody made those? Yeah, definitely. Yeah, who was was he was asking about whether your porn was ethical.
Good question. Anyway. If you enjoyed the show, leave us an apple podcast review. We have been getting a bunch of reviews. We appreciate
anyone came through saves in there.
Yeah, we got one this Morning. Fun content and easy to listen to any time of the day. Three kind funny and quirky Ozzy dude. keep me happy and mindful everyday haven't missed an episode since 2018. Amazing. smartest gronk Dr. k.
Dr. k. Height the daily talk show.com his email address if you want to send us an email also that Facebook group where we've been live streaming, we're just doing it on. It's a closed Facebook group. Yeah. So if you just type in the daily talk show on the Facebook search, you'll find us there.
I let someone in this morning without any question people. They answered the questions wrong. That's a guy dude. There's a couple of battles out there. I was question. It was None. None of them not my friend. I didn't know it wasn't from Austin. Don't know who they are the
one who wrote Amy is quitting. gronk
Yeah. Is that Amy? Is that Amy's friend, Donna? So my friend, I don't know. Okay. So I let them in because I think it's a bit stinky to let People just hang especially the ones who haven't asked the question they should you should message them because my role would just be
such as your message to them what they say
not a message to them I'm saying you guys who came up with the question thing should message the ones who haven't written anything and say hey, you haven't answered the question we need to let you in. Stinky if you just let people hang but you're just you're letting anyone know people in who have attempted so
so that's the only requirement is that you need
to crack lucky they need to follow the rules which are given at try and answer it. So it was nice at me maybe
not we know who Queen crunky
know what I know who Queen donkey.
We're trying to just get a sense of who like the the buy in on the show. And I just want to make sure that like they're not questions about us like we've specifically segue drunk because it's like,
when did you start listening? Maybe we just changed the question.
If it's if it's whenever When did you start listening? That's a good so it's it's a two months ago, right? Don't believe me? If, if you can answer the first question. I'm SAS. And so the thing is, we want to make sure that we've got a community filled with people that are interested. And so I just want to make sure we can change the question to make it a little bit more
agree with 100 groups if I'm not interested in who would that be? A lot of people do. Well, I think the Yeah,
we don't want to Deadwood is essentially what and sorry if you can't work if you can't go through it. And what do you think says
no, I think we let them hang. If they can't answer Queen gronk then Joe. That's I mean, Todd, crack. Tom also said let them hang need some standards.
Yeah. Yeah, I agree.
Give it a show. I think if they give it a go, they get in but if they don't give it a go, and they just written nothing, I think maybe it's a message we'd love to have you in the, in the programme in the love to have you in the group. Can you answer that? Can you answer because then you can imagine me doing that just fucking I didn't know that was buddy in question.
Yeah No I think the people who answer them wrong done I'll bet that
I've given it a crack my
blood I can see why you let them in because I know I partner with him the gronk squad so it's like I get that
there's just that consideration to around like where where do we draw the line if they can't came up with it and said please clean gronk and they said sky Mr.
because anyone can be anyone sky That's funny. It could be anyone running
late I mean just they just wanna have a poke around
now which will it's our house take the fucking shoes off
anyone else so Glenn said did Friday's location for drinks I
will message you but it is happening. I just Hello everyone say right now as well as messaged you, it's happening at moon doggo g in Abbotsford. I repeat Moondog Oj 5pm onwards will be arriving with you the reserve section spoke to my homie brookies organised the section for us 1717 for drinks 17 juke straight Abbotsford that's where it's happening 5pm this Friday
I'm not used to this whole thing. I people going to like a it's about
you guys like you do that? You can do it. I mean I got offered a drink. The first time I had a drink. Richard CEO of Bastion effects the founder on he offered to buy me a drink.
Have you offered anyone this year?
Yeah, we when I was with James and my brother. We we all bought around each. And so that that's what that's some etiquette that you can do. If you like this I'll buy three drinks, you buy three drinks, you buy three drinks and then we're done.
itself is 15 I just feel the pain the show not something. I just don't want to sit crazy expectations. Where do we want to buy one round?
Is that what you say?
Yeah, I mean, I wouldn't do that make you more
So we just we just say that we say if you come on Friday, we'll buy you a beer. buy you one beer. You fucking gronk one beer. One beer. You don't have to buy us a bit by
Because Yeah, they'll get crazy if everyone had to buy right
now what i'd love Harry there with the company. Can I just Hey, guys. Happy Harry. Have you had one? I know you've had one. Be Your dad. Happy? Yeah, he'd be very, very far. I'd love
to do the talk show. So tomorrow guys have a good one. Hey, guys.