#429 – Emmylou Loves Her Tribe/
- August 19, 2019
Emmylou is the Australian powerhouse building an immersive brand across so many areas, we can’t even name them all! Events, fashion, cooking and presenting — Emmylou authentically shares every aspect of her life, from Instagram Lives to her own TV and web series. The backbone of it all: an unapologetic drive to serve her tribe and show up every single day.
On today’s episode of The Daily Talk Show we discuss:
– The Emmylou Loves tribe
– Starting and showing up
– Negativity, ego and doubt from those closest to you
– Having two phones
– Faking until you make it
– Being consistent and authentic
Emmylou on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/emmylou_loves
Emmylou on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC873o0ofdaKn0GOXawAhvgw
Emmylou’s website: https://emmylouloves.com/
Email us: hi@bigmediacompany.com.au
Send us mail: PO BOX 400, Abbotsford VIC 3067
A conversation sometimes worth recording with mates Tommy Jackett & Josh Janssen. Each weekday, Tommy & Josh chat about life, creativity, business and relationships — big questions and banter. Regularly visited by guests and friends of the show! This is The Daily Talk Show.
This podcast is produced by BIG MEDIA COMPANY. Find out more at https://bigmediacompany.com/
Episode Tags
0:03
It's the daily Talk Show Episode 429. EmmyLou
0:07
is in the building with me, Lou, we've got you on to talk extensively about skydiving for the next hour. It's been a while since I've done that. I was just telling the boys that you used to skydive. Yes, yes. I used to skydive a lot. I mean, when I first met you, that's what I found out. And I was like, Oh, she's crazy. I mean, I SkyDrive strapped to some poor bastard. But you're doing it solo back in the day.
0:36
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it takes it takes a while to get to that point. But yeah, my first skydive was was on my own. I had two instructors holding on to my own reconnoitred you do a course and you get Yeah, I lost Yeah, yeah, it's awesome. Are you gonna have I was gonna say boss you don't have
0:51
that you gotta have some bollocks to do something like that. And we're not going to talk about skydiving for the next hour that was a joke if
0:57
you if you actually thought
1:00
it's your show.
1:04
So people might will people would know you me Lou loves like that's that's your brand that's Yeah, that's where you're pushing video content you sell your like the the clothing that you're that you sell. Is that right? Just in regards to like the cut through in like you being on the street and actually seeing people wearing it and stuff.
1:26
It's absolutely incredible. It's such a thrill. But do you know I love seeing women on the street with their clothes. I actually fan go over that. I think what I love the most is when I get those messages saying hey, I wore your dress or I wore your jacket to a party. Someone else actually was wearing it too. She came up we were so excited. We got photos we got chatting, and you know, not often you hear about women being excited about twinning. You know where is it is just phenomenal. They absolutely love it. Or the other thing is someone will recognise him is that an Emmy loves witty? Yep. And then they stop chatting a check out chicks the whole it's just amazing. And it's creating this community and starting conversations and Connexions that would never have happened. What about if you with your best at and you rock up and you're wearing the same thing? Is that still annoying? Or is that? I mean, is it or is it just your clothing that it's actually a win? So then you've turned something that was once annoying into a win? Well, I've never found it annoying at all. And and I know some people might but I think that's maybe you know, they're feeling a little bit insecure or whatever, at the time, but it's definitely a win when it comes to to my clothes.
2:30
I've been trying to get him out of that
2:36
hat on first that you did.
2:44
on your website, you talk about your tribe, how important has that been as part of the everything that you're doing?
2:51
The community in the tribe? The key to everything? And that doesn't just mean the cut through and maybe the success that you see or you you measure with what I'm doing? Yeah, the tribe is everything to them. You mean they are feeling a part of something and that's you know, I'm obsessed with my phone I've got to find you know, I've got a bonafide and I'm obsessed with it. I'm on my phone all the time. I love it
3:14
about different phones you have Android and iPhone, are they
3:17
you know
3:23
to Apple account
3:25
numbers try and do the same apps on both Yeah.
3:31
Cuz I like this idea. Yeah, like I
3:35
said gangster down but the realities ones just so my kids can watch. I mean,
3:43
you got a plan went into the winter like an artist plan or whatever. And then it was service was annoying me and now one of the new phone and to that effect. So before you know what I had two phones, you got sold. But the thing was that I wasn't using it. I was never I never had them at the same time and was like bang
4:00
happened is I should have probably said okay, this is my personal finding. And this is my business, right? But I didn't I just started calling people from all the different up now everyone's got both phones, I can't live without them. There's no rhyme or reason. There's literally no logic behind them. But what I was getting at was that I love my phone, I'm addicted to my phone. I love it. But the more we sort of delve into our phones, the more we use it the more use social media, we actually miss and yearn human connexion. Right. And that's the thing we're going back to the community in the tribe. That's been the amazing thing, Jeremy is that we are all feeling connected and we're coming out to these events and I'm encouraging you to get out or I'm encouraged I'm encouraging them to say hey, oh my god, is that me loves footy. You know, that takes a lot of balls some people to say that definitely doesn't always happen. I had a guy I'm he was at DFO and he was serving coffee to somebody and had said you're wearing the me like now a male like saying you know you're wearing the me loves jumpsuit. You look amazing in it. But just at that lady was so wrapped Yeah. And so I was the guy Jeremy and they both messaged me the separate storeys I didn't realise and they were just wanting to say, Hey, you know, this happened to me today. And I felt amazing.
5:12
Yeah, I think if if Tommy and if this happened to Tommy and I were a couple of Narcissus already. I don't know food Co Op too much. I think my ears would be ringing I'd have tears in my eyes.
5:21
What's wrong with Dean enough?
5:25
When when I first met you, me, Emily, through a mutual friend Charlotte. I remember her telling me She's like, you've got to look at me letters instead. It's I can't stop looking at the storeys, and she's like, I'm addicted. She's gonna be the next big thing. She really said that to me. And so then I got on the Emmy Lou Insta storey bandwagon. I mean, you've been doing the Gary Vee hundred pieces of content a day. For the last year and a half, I reckon how many pages? Three? How many? How many pages of content? Are you putting out a day? Like if you want cut out the storey? I know you probably film a long storey and then whack it in.
6:03
Yeah, no, you know, I don't actually measure in terms of how much content it's actually just what's going on in my life. So you know, if I'm cooking for a party, and there are four or five recipes that I'm going to do, or I'm actually cooking for my kids birthday party, they're all going to land on it. If I've filmed it, you know, if my kid wants to film me doing it, you know, or whatever. So it really it's not about how much I'm doing a day. It's just what's going on in my life. And if we can get that up on there, because it's very important to me, it's kind of real life. We don't go, Oh, this would make some great content. film that let's get you over there. You know, it's very much like, hey, let's go Hey, I'm about to walk out the door. Can you press record? Thanks.
6:39
I mean, cooking for your kids that made you make it look like it's a full blown dinner party. Yeah, I wish I had you cooking for my kids and maybe on the
6:46
time because you know, they don't eat it.
6:50
The best. Beta she'll she'll watch me on a live she'll be on the other side of the phone. And all you hear is my little four year olds voice test discuss it. Portuguese chicken. absolutely nuts. You know, there's hundreds of people in the live. Oh my god, this is amazing. I'm going to post the recipe and then you've got Yeah, that's disgusting.
7:10
What do you like? What do they like to white? Rice Ball? Yeah, like every kid chicken nuggets.
7:15
Yeah, no, I don't even think I'll ha yeah, I mean, but they do eat it. Yeah. Did they do that we thing with all at once. I remember I made the mac and cheese. I loved it. Yeah. So then I made a double batch the next week? No, no, I didn't touch it.
7:28
It was exactly this. I can trade. That's very upsetting. cases I can
7:34
eat it doesn't know what's good.
7:37
Starting anywhere. Like Josh and I were talking about lives and be doing a live and you've been live event though. He's still I'm sorry. Yeah. I think I think you started doing. I mean, I saw more into lives from you than anyone I ever followed. Right? And so it's like he jumped onto that. But the thing about an Insta live when you got one person Josh called it it's just a fun Tom Cole.
8:02
I was watching a live the other day. And I just popped in and said, one fact I can't leave now.
8:10
But But what was that like starting? Because everyone starts with one person.
8:16
I think I started I think, maybe 1000 followers at the time. And you know, for me, it was really about practising. And I remember saying that, hey, I'm going live tonight, we've got six weeks to go before I'm going to host my first event. So I'm going live, every single Wednesday, Late Night Live, we're going to talk about shit, we're just going to get it done. And it was really about showing up. And then from there, you start to practice sort of active selflessness. It really doesn't matter how many people it it really doesn't. Yeah, because what you're saying is gold, if you truly believe in what you're saying, it doesn't matter if you're talking about a Portuguese chicken, or if you're talking about life, or, or relationships or whatever, you know, those two people that one person, they mean just as much as 500 people 600 people inside the passion has never left and the passion was always there. And I think that's why I became it's become such a important part of who I am and and also so important to the fans as well and to the community. Hey, when you're gonna jump on into a live love? Yeah, it's real lot
9:13
just having a bigger audience change the type of content Do you think that you make?
9:17
None, not for me, it doesn't I understand how that can change. For me it, you know, because I've sort of tried to see as much as I can in that driver's seat. With regards to being executive producer on the TV show, like, you know, making sure that I'm creating merchandise so that I don't have to dilute You know, my socials with, you know, stuff that doesn't align. So for me, the growth it, it hasn't changed at all. The only thing is that my thumb gets really sore because the DM is going great. I've always had a lot of DMS, I've always had a lot of engagement. And I've always been quite available to that. And right now, you know, I'm trying to work out how can we sustain that? Because literally replying So say I get around three to 400. Today, I'll reply to around 150 200 a day, boys take note.
10:05
Yeah, we're crumbling at 61
10:09
you know, and they're very short and sharp answers. We're not talking long winded. And then and I'll be quite brutal. And hey, May, I can't, you know, I can't give you that recipe right now. It's literally just cooked it on storeys, press rewind, watch it or, you know, because there's a lot of that as well. Can you let me know the recipe can you let me know the shoes, you actually replying to the storey where the shoes attacked? But you know, and you just let them know. And people are really understanding about that as well. Behind the scenes. I remember you telling me when we first met just around, you wanted to do TV presenting and I'm gonna be we've spoken a couple of times, we spoke on the phone about it. What do you have? Like I think that's like a
10:47
destination to land right? Which gives you the inspiration to start. What about for people that feel like they've got nothing to say, you know that i don't i want to do what Emmylou does. But I don't feel like I have anything to say. Okay, so take a step back. They want to do what I do in terms of presenting what I tend to showing up on the instal instal connecting with people creating a tribe. But then this sort of feeling that crippled, because I'm in a bit of a similar situation to you, I started wanting to be a presenter, which I wasn't in that wasn't where I want ended up landing, and doing radio, stuff like that. But it gave me a reason to start. And even though I felt like sometimes I don't have anything to say I had this mechanism, which is like, try and be a TV presenter, you know, do some scripts and create little storeys, so actually got me to finding that creative thing that I love
11:39
finding that purpose. Exactly. But
11:41
I think a lot of people get crippled by I've got nothing to say, but I kind of want to be, you know, putting myself out there. Yeah, yeah.
11:47
You know, I think it's kind of similar to this question that she told me.
12:00
Maybe just make it make it for yourself?
12:02
Yeah, I think with goal setting it work backwards. Okay. So realistically, you've got nothing to say, you know that you want to be out there saying, work backwards. Now, why do you want to be out there saying, What's that first? What does that mean to you? Why is that? And then, you know, maybe there's something that's driven you maybe it's just a childhood dream? Maybe there's something that you're trying to prove to someone in particular? And then that takes brutal honesty, right? But you got to kind of work backwards from there and go, Okay, why am I doing that first? And why does it mean so much to me? So, really, I'm teasing out those particular wise first, then maybe somewhere in there, you're going to start to land on a particular purpose, or a particular reason. And then again, you tease out that reasonable? Why did I want to prove myself to my mom, my dad, my ex boyfriend? What? Why does that mean so much to me? Again, tease it out, again, work backwards from that, you know, you're talking about starting from scratch this. So that's going to take a little bit of unpacking. And the thing with that is, I just don't think you need to be afraid of that. Don't be afraid to unpack that sheet. And don't be afraid if you don't come up with the answer straight away. Not not the Dalai Lama.
13:11
Does the why change? changes every day? Yeah.
13:14
Like I'm a woman. Every single day,
13:16
what was the Y at the beginning? And what is it now?
13:18
Yeah, for me, yeah. The why was definitely because I felt I could entertain, I felt I could communicate, I can tell storeys, and I can do it in an entertaining way that people would digest. That was definitely always the way like, I can do this. I don't know. I don't know, particularly why. I don't know if that's what everyone else is going to think. But I know that when I do it, it makes me really happy. You know, so that was that that particular one. Now, that didn't change because all of a sudden, I started to see something, you know, inspiration in people and and the connexion with people and the fact that there was that related reliability, I guess, but then it changed again, because and I think that this is really important. You could go one way good. I'm inspirational man. Yeah, you know, like, people are inspired by make know, they're actually not inspired by themselves. They're inspired by what they see in you that reflects back to them that that shit is the cool stuff. Yeah. And that's the stuff that now I feel more driven to remind people. Hey, I'm not the inspiring one. Here. You are. Yeah, you can see it inspired people get inspired will make sense.
14:24
Don't change people. People change.
14:26
Exactly. Yeah. And that's what I want. I want to remind people I'm just here like a little bacon like, you know, cheerleader for you, but it but it's actually you that is going to do the work.
14:35
And so sustainable looking at that way, right? Because otherwise, if you do it the other way. If it's you It's too much fucking pressure. Yeah. And
14:42
I you know, and I don't want that. Yeah, yeah. You know, because at any time Instagram could be gone. If I'm if I'm gone, what you've What have you got Lyft you've got to really see in yourself, what ignites you to get going and get motivated? Might be only one little thing. And that's okay. Just build on that.
14:59
Yeah. So you're me loves us on community TV, as well as on YouTube. Is that right? Yeah.
15:05
So it's on community TV, and it's on YouTube and Facebook. But as of the last couple weeks is on channel 10. Peach
15:16
channel teach.
15:20
Getting a TV show in God's it literally doesn't have three years for you. Oh, my God.
15:24
Yeah. I mean, that's I guess the The interesting thing is about the way that your approach is I remember working on community TV years and years and years ago. And what I love about what you've done is, you're not necessarily a school of the community TV industry, that's just a platform for you to do what you do great, but you'll put it anywhere. And I think that that's the case. Some people will watch it on YouTube, other people consuming on Facebook, and I even find I'm interchanging between wherever I am and my god like on a Sunday night I'll see on like an instant storey. Yeah. Emmylou loves his, you know, on YouTube or whatever. I switch on to that. Yeah,
16:02
it's that drew viewing behaviour. And we all have it. I mean, like, I nowadays, I put on a movie just to purely scroll on my phone. It's like, oh, what do I feel like watching today? Or you know, I'll put on like town with Ben Ben Affleck. Well, I love hate. Michael Mann movies. I really dark machine.
16:18
I love it blaring Well, I'm just squarely scrolling.
16:22
Well, I was doing that the other night. Brian and I were watching the Bachelor. But the annoying thing is though, man, yeah. Horrible content. Yeah, I'm sorry about that. But the thing is, where I was saying that fall apart was Bry was actually consuming it. And I've just got Instagram videos on full volume. That drives me mad.
16:42
Yeah, I use the air pods. Yeah.
16:43
I mean, left selfish.
16:47
Think about your partner by and so the with when it comes to product in content? Do you see content is something that we should be monetizing? Or do we need to make money off content? Or is that really, really just a mechanism to sell a product?
17:02
Oh, goodness, you know what I think it really depends on who you are and what your brand is, and who your audiences. That's what we need to really be listening to what is your audience actually want? How did they digest you and your content, or the products that you're selling, or whatever it is. So, you know, you don't have to make any excuses about what you're doing out there to make a living at all. You just have to be really again, coming back to that brutal honesty, about a doing it with your audience in mind, because I know, you know, for the last three, three years, I've held out on a lot of stuff because the first person that comes to my mind, like obviously, there's my family, but it's my community, what do they need? So you know, when someone offers me a product in Dec you out, you know, all of your stuff, and it's like, how's that going to help my community? Yeah, how's me, you know, rocking around in the best kitchen, whatever? How's that going? To help them?
17:53
Is it fuck with the brand? So they like a bit flawed? Bye, bye.
17:56
Yeah, you know, it's been a long little time. But they're, they're caught in a non now. You know? And And the thing is, that was okay, that I you know, at no point do I take offence to that, because they're just doing again, what's best for them? And what they think their audience Yeah, of course. So we're really, you know, you making sure you're aligning with what, what you're getting back community
18:14
saying no, a lot of people will have fear of saying no, because I think that then they won't have another opportunity.
18:19
Yeah, and you got to be really lucky. That's the thing. You gotta throw it all away. You know, it's like skydiving, right? You exit that aircraft. And you're all in. And, and for me that that's how it is with with me loves brand. It's like, Well, you know what, and I had my parents question me, Jesus, when you make money out of this lead, you know, like, and it was, it really got to that real sticky end. Remember, last year, sort of mid last year around this time last year? I had that awkward phone call, you know, from from my parents, it's going well, Jesus, like, come on? And it's like, No, you know, because I know what we're doing here.
18:55
How did you take it? I mean, yeah, how do you take it because I guess that there's a lot of awesome, amazing things out there that don't make cash Did you always know that there was going to be even not even care, I guess, like what people might miss with all of this is like, it's not even a fact tonne of money. I guess you probably just want to keep sustaining and being able to do what you're doing.
19:19
I wanted to sustain the TV show. So. So that's where my, I guess the way that I approached when, when I got approached for maybe sponsored content and stuff like that, you know, at first, it's like, oh, wow, someone, you know, values my, my community and values, my voice, you know, only took probably, I think, two posts to realise, no, I don't care at all, like Jermaine and I really realised that I wanted to organise a meetup. Because I'd done the sponsored content, I thought, This is what it was all about, Hey, you know, my community wants me, they didn't care about this posted gone out, we're done. I was like, oh, okay, this is how it works. And so that's where a literally only took two. And then I was like, okay, you want to be a part of these than this, the TV show, there's my projects that need to be funded. And we need a full 360 degree view of how, you know, my audience works. So you want to come on board with me loves in my community, then we need to have it all going all at once. And I won't charge like, you know, I won't make a lot of money out of this. I don't care. It's what I want, and really stuck to that. And I think that's where the merchandise started to come on board. Because I was like, okay, that can sustain me. And that can be something that is sold, but not sold. With that obligation to my audience to buy, you know, you want to dress you buy it, you won't buy it because like, Oh, I feel bad, I better get it for her. She's you know, like, she's, it's not like that. It's if you like the dress, you buy it. And you know, as women were ruthless, we like it, we'll get it and we'll sell our firstborn for it. But you know, it and it felt like a nice way to be able to do it and sustain the other creative projects and all the content that I love to push out every single day.
20:55
And is that is it about saying, Okay, these are things I'm drawing a circle around these, this is what's going on be free? Always. Do you think about it that way? Or?
21:04
No, no, no, actually, to be honest, no, I don't think about what's going to be free and what's going to be paid. I really just take every opportunity and go Okay, what does this look like entertainment wise? What does it look like? And community wise? How does it sit? You know? And then most importantly, how does this one mate? Do I enjoy it? Do I love the product? You know, I think we do who is our What about you know sponsors for the for the show? Like it took me 12 weeks, I got I used their product for 12 weeks, you know, and then and looked around and you know, made fun of it been on the bottom shelf and dusted it all day actually bring that up? Because it you know, vinted hope we saw that someone showed us that. Yeah.
21:43
Totally bagging. You know,
21:49
it's, it's, it's real. I think you put out so much content, and I feel like you share a lot. Is there anything you don't share?
21:57
I think the one thing I don't share people don't? Don't you they pick up on it is I don't actually share it. A lot of the kids so the kids are there. You know, I've got kids screaming in the background, that when I am playing with them hanging out with them doing stuff, you don't actually see any of that, you know, because I'm actually doing it so that that's my time. Apart from that I'll just share whenever the whenever I feel like I want to have got time, the pulled back on anything like you You shared a little bit more and then you've pulled back. I know you shared about your partner.
22:30
Yeah. And the relationship.
22:31
Yeah, yeah. The only time I'll pull back is if we're right in the middle, right amongst a gentleman because no one can figure out their ship when they write. But once you're out of it, you can say, Jesus, I was standing in a Polish ship that
22:46
would be pretty I'd watch it. Yeah.
22:49
I mean, the thing is that if we're feeling revved up about something you don't go and have the conversation straight away. Yeah, let alone creating fucking content for and
22:58
that's where it comes back that selflessness as well. Yeah, you know, I get on and have a rant you go and have a think about it, you know, you actually leave through that experience first. And if there is something that you've learned about it, you can share that you don't have to share the whole storey. And the other thing that, you know, I try not to share any storeys that aren't about me as such, you know, I make sure that they're like, they're actually my storeys to share.
23:21
And the the authenticity piece, is there a separation between you as a person and what you're sharing? From a content point of view? Hmm,
23:34
like as in a personality as well? Yeah.
23:35
So the reason I think about it is because if you're giving your all and yourself all the time, there's, you're removing all barriers, which means it can be super awesome. But it means that things like external forces, like an audience disagreeing with something could actually really hurt is their mechanism so that you make sure that that energy that you're putting in he's too good use, and it doesn't actually reflect on you negatively?
24:03
God, I'd like to say that, you know, that happens. And I think I'm only just getting to that point, because it's just that, you know, almost like balance doesn't really exist. And you know, and you don't realise that until you're out of balance. Yeah. And then that's when you realise, hey, I am not reserving I know, I don't have any self preservation right now. I've got nothing left in the tank. And then you start to look back and go, Okay, how can I change this around a little bit? How can I make sure that my family and my priority and things like that, and I have gone through that size? We're hoping that also, and I haven't been the party, and I had to really take a look at myself. And I was scared to like, shit, is it too late? You know, my, my oldest is eight years old, in my affected, he's gone, you know, and but it's never too late. Right. And it was only it was probably like a really intense six month period where there was a sort of a big growth, but then also that stress of like, there was a growth in the profile, maybe not a growth in finances and how that was working as a business. Yeah. And I was really stretched and all made, did the family feel it? And and then when I came out of that, again, when I was on the outside of that, I was like Jesus, if I don't do something soon, yeah, these kids are going to think that they're not my number one priority, when really, ultimately, I want to do everything for them. And so that had to really, really shift and it had to, I mean, I don't think it changed on who I am on socials. I don't think it changes. You know, who I push out, like in terms of content, because that's just me never going to change me. I'm just who I am. Whether you've got a phone or a camera in my face, it's the same I probably just swear a little less when,
25:39
like, when the cameras there.
25:42
I swear I'm just a tablet, it's awareness. Right. And sometimes you have to push those boundaries to even understand the awareness for something. Yeah, you know, I said that thing happening? What was the moment save, you know, thing with kids in priority? What's the moment is that like a, you know, Oh, God,
26:02
I think you know, and people do have breakthrough moments. I can't say I've had I don't get full breakthroughs. I get these mini ones. These mini little like pokes and I'm like, Oh, that's uncomfortable. But you kind of ignored as well and because you still busy you still driven and you're still in you know a bit of an asshole mood or mode, just a Not, not mood. So you still kind of driven you think No, no, keep going keep going and then all of a sudden they start to stack up and then you like fuck, that's not a poke that saw, you know, and you realise, okay, that's been hitting at me for the last six months and I haven't seen it and then I think there was you know, one particular thing where I was kind of scared to come home. I was not scared to come home, but I felt flat coming home because I felt like that my family hadn't missed me while I was away and that I actually was better off out doing stuff. And that's when I realised I made no kid I know. You know, doesn't miss them. You know what I mean? Like
26:59
following it on the Instagram as well. So they say
27:17
went to maker Island. nega nega nega it is the mecca of Mecca as you get to go to Necker Island.
27:25
So that's that's Richard Branson's.
27:29
It was part of a leadership programme for business chicks. Yeah,
27:33
what's it like there?
27:34
You know what, it took two days of full on travel to get this over four days that I was there. I felt like I just come out of revolt. paint on a two day bender. So it was fantastic. It was a tropical island. Obviously, Richard brands there. It's quite surreal. I must admit, it was one of those ones where I didn't feel 100% comfortable. You know, you're on a really rich man. He's awesome. And that it? It rocked me it kind of rocked me in and I couldn't work out. Okay, why am I here? What am I doing? I knew I was interviewing him, of course. And that it? Yeah, it
28:13
was an imposter syndrome, or
28:15
Yeah, you know what, I've never had that. Before that I did wonder, Is this what this imposter syndrome is all about? It's not that I didn't feel I didn't deserve to be there. And you know, you pay money to be there and be part of the programme. I did feel, however, that I had put a lot of high hopes on that interview with Richard. So I felt you know, I've put a lot of high hopes on that. I'm going to interview Richard Branson, boom, my profile is going to go crazy. And you know what happened afterwards, I was so angry at myself. And the interview was amazing. He was fantastic. Or went well, but then I thought, Why the fuck would you put your own personal value and how well you can do in your life on the person that you're interviewing? Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Like, you're going good. You're going great guns as it is. And that's, that's that's where I did feel very uncomfortable and little disappointed in myself. Like, why would you do that? and set the standard for yourself that enabling someone else to dictate where you're going to go?
29:07
Do you think that your community cared about it as much as you cared about the interview? Such were you looking at from a Kimmy I wonder, because I guess you're someone who cares so much about their tribe and their community? It sounds like maybe part of the disconnect was it was a moment of the self.
29:30
Oh, this is gonna really ignite I'd like
29:33
to have audio on it.
29:36
No Audio
29:37
interview? Yes, I was, you know, but at the same time, there was obviously amazing learnings and also that that sort of self confidence, confidence, I can interview Richard Branson and do all right, you know, it's very intimate environment, which you guys know, that's always harder to do those those types of interviews when you just in front of like, 25 people in these lounge room. Alyssa mine is over there you go. McMahon's? You know, it's pretty crazy, right. And I did really well. And he came up even the next day. And he was like, he really well, I really enjoyed that. You know, I had him laughing and didn't take it all too seriously. When he was talking about launching into space for God's sake.
30:12
Confidence is contagious. Bring that. Was he feeling that? I mean, I think you've got an energy about you. And that's what and that's you, right? So you just amplifying yourself you be you. And that's when you've got a chance to connect
30:26
and you probably connected with exactly yeah. And and and also it didn't matter. It doesn't matter. Just like we're talking about the line doesn't matter if there's one person or 800 people right now everyone has that right to connect. So it doesn't matter if I'm interviewing Richard Branson, or, or you know, someone that's just from demonstrate, it doesn't matter, you know?
30:45
Always Always
30:46
so this time last year, you're on the phone to your parents. How did you how did you take that call?
30:53
Did you hang up?
30:54
No, no, no, yet, you know, again, I think it's really important not to be driven by the ego because you can driven by the ego of it, you'd be like, Oh, God, you know, they put me down. They don't believe in me. And you know, straightaway. That's the first thing that people always say, they don't believe in me. No, actually, you don't believe in yourself and you just attaching to one thing that they've said. They just care about you. They just care about you. They care about your kids. They're wanting to know you. Are you stretching too much. Are you burning the candle at both ends? That's all that's happening. Again, it comes back to that going backwards. Like starting from the
31:26
first thought though, because that's pretty a conscious mindset to be into
31:31
40 years I've been dealing with those guys for like, forever My whole life. So for me, I was just like, it's all right, dad. I got this. Yeah. 10 grand.
31:43
Your investors as well.
31:46
To talk them off the ledge. Yeah.
31:54
Yeah. And so Josh, you're saying that? That is that takes a level of awareness in the moment think like that. I mean, I'd be reactive. My mom said to me, like you guys doing what you do then? Right? Because what she sees is this, she's probably watching now. Hi, mom. But she saw you can't blame people around us creatives that sort of have this outward thing that sort of entertains and informed and educated, makes someone feel happy or whatever. Because that's what the product of this but they don't need to understand. And I mean, a lot of our parents probably wouldn't understand this space, because a lot of it isn't understood by us just yet. Right?
32:32
Exactly. It's a really weird I like this. What do you mean, it's on Facebook? Is it on? Can I do it with the remote? No, you know, and so, um, you know, they've got an iPad so they can see it. And they know and even my mom, you know, she went out and bought an iPad because she wouldn't be able to watch it. You know, she lives in Bumbry. So, and when I heard that she wanted that I was like, oh, I'll buy you an iPad, you know, and and so was that her 10 grand.
32:57
Get a free. Brandon, Brandon.
33:08
And you know, and it was really cool. So they didn't need to necessarily understand and, you know, all they want to do is feel proud and know that you're okay, no matter what you're doing. Yeah, you can be bricklaying, and I just wanna know, you're safe. You're okay, and you're being fit. So what about
33:22
negativity? How do you like here? Like, I feel like I was just watching online. The other day, someone sort of doing coaching and saying you need to cut the negativity out, you need to be very across who you're surrounding yourself with? Yeah.
33:38
As hard one, because negativity. I'm sorry, I'm
33:51
lifting my leg up. I wasn't my fault.
34:00
What's the question?
34:07
Yeah, I think that's a hard one. Because it comes up when you least expecting
34:11
and all the people that you don't expect it
34:13
from the people that are like sitting right there, you know, sometimes and that, that one can mock with your head and endings. It stings, it hurts and it can make you angry, and honestly, lucky. Normally only get angry when you hurt. You know, so when my parents say something like that, I do take it as their Karen because it's your family, your family got your back, even when they've been sheets, they got your back, you know, but then when when negative activity comes in from, you know, just unlikely sources, it starts to throw you a little bit, and that one can leave you a little bit wobbly. And then you get a couple of trolls, you know, throw a couple of people that you don't even know Yeah, that's what kids the ones that you don't know. Probably sitting there,
34:54
you know, like I I find that easier that I find the the the face I don't know who's a troll a lot easier than the person who I feel should know me and yeah, doesn't get it because then it feels like I'm a bit out of like, there's an alignment piece. Yeah,
35:11
sometimes it's been a bit of both, sometimes I'll have that. But I can talk that out with, you know, with someone because you do know them. So I can talk it out with Aaron and grey cloud. I wonder why they did that. And you can, obviously you're assuming a little time, but at least you can have that discussion. But sometimes with with the faceless troll, I'm like, Oh my god, I just want to Firstly, paste. Yeah, they're making fun of me and my kids or whatever. But at the same time you you want to, you want to ask them, what's the justification for that? You know, whereas I can kind of work out when it's when it's negativity coming from someone you might know, you know, that's so interesting, because
35:55
I feel absolute opposite. I feel like you know what, Pete, like the trolls or people who like that's projecting that detect like, I'm dead?
36:04
I feel like yeah, that's a much more sane
36:07
way to look at it. But I think that the thing is, you can at least reconcile better, closer relationships. I feel like I'm way more likely people out.
36:15
Oh, that's the thing, though. I have had to do that a lot. And just go, you know, what, what you're saying and what you're doing, I can really see it and recognise it and I'm just gonna back off. I don't even fight with that sort of stuff. Because you know, it's their shit. I just, I really just bow out. And I think that's something that you have to learn to do. Yeah, it's bow that doesn't always feel like you've gotten closure. But at least you're not around.
36:39
Yeah. What about like trance forming yourself? So we're constantly changing? How do you deal with people who say I know the real me, Lou, I know you back here or then versus where you are today? How do you? How do you start that conversation? Well,
36:56
firstly, I'd say when do you know me? Yes, dying for the most? Well,
37:11
it depends. And it does happen. It's funny. But it only happens now in the world of Instagram, on you Emmylou and she had 5000 followers. Okay. Zika, any bearing on my body whatsoever.
37:28
And so he's
37:30
honestly, like, meeting you at Charlotte's place, saying,
37:33
like, aligning yourself a bit to it. It's a big part of your identity. hanging on.
37:42
The positive bit of that is it's like, when people follow you, they're backing you. So there's something exciting that people see in that same back I, I backed me, Lou, in the early days, and
37:53
it doesn't matter if they backing me at 1000 photos, the back of me at 76,000 It doesn't matter. They're part of that journey. Yeah. And they're a part of that success. And I think that's really important to always push that back to them. You're part of my success, you know, and then and then they, they, like, it just makes you feel good, you know, and they understand that I'm grateful as well. It's there's nothing better than someone showing you gratitude.
38:17
100% I think, though, when someone has 1000 close followers, right, and this is not an example on you, it's like maybe a musician, where it's like, are they indie at that point, right? We love being able to go to small gig. I think Ed Sheeran was the example Yes, doing stadium shows from doing shitty old pubs to do studying chess, there has to be a difference and you become something different for other people. And so people do fall off and I think that can rattle you you know like you have someone who's really tapped in in the early days and then you like with a go Yeah, but then it's like oh, well maybe that you're just not for them at that point. Yeah,
38:54
you're not serving them anymore and that's okay as well you know, you're not for everyone all the time you know you just like friends like member you had those hardcore friends when you live in St Charles house bar Nicholas eating their food you know you they're never gonna pop my army remember the night you know you have those friends but man what you would tie Yeah. And and you were both in each other's lives and you created amazing memories and then you just drift away Yeah. And and that there's I don't see that as negative as well. And I think that can happen with the fan base as well. Yeah.
39:30
What do you like it you kids school when you go in there who's me Lou going into that environment I'm the worst
39:38
school draw school drop off me I'm, I'm normally very much in work by by then. So I'm up at seven and I'm waiting. I'm waiting to like get on the phone. And especially at the moment Jeremy. I've really scaled that back so that I can be there drop them off man I am I'm on my phone doing some sushi school drop a school pick up that one I found really hot, I'm exhausted. But I've still got good air and half of the working day. So you know, people don't realise that I am actually on the phone it from eight until five 530. And back before I sort of had the team and had more of a schedule, I would you know scheduling calls for 830 when the kids were in bed. Whereas now you know that is for a different time that you know I need to do stuff other stuff or I need to actually have some downtime. So now you know I kind of make those rules now. It's it's work time between like a normal business day. But that can sometimes I can pull myself up and go or I get your head out of you fine chocolate in your pocket. He kept the kids show up be interested. I mean, like I've had to pull myself up even this year I've had to do that. I mean the whole thing is it's
40:41
what 330 Speak up. Oh, there's still
40:45
you're rushing right and
40:46
you've got two phones
40:52
in my pocket does that
40:53
work with Bluetooth connexion I heard
40:56
attached to buy
40:58
one away otherwise they would like that yeah yeah it's the way it's
41:03
not ideal you vaping go because I whenever I imagine you driving you've got like a full decked out decal. Me Lou loves car certainly
41:11
do. I mean that's been
41:15
that's been a dream of mine with the daily talk show I think first hundred episodes we're talking about that I tried to convince Tommy to you know maybe what was the thinking what was the thoughts behind that? How did you get that
41:30
well for me I you know, I always try and think of ways to offer value to the brands that I'm partner up with. And you know, wherever you meet Mitsubishi came in with you know a car when I had no following like my my storey my old silver bullet 20 year old Holden station waggon Cox it I do some storeys on it I think our storey
41:49
I think it went flat or something happened on the whole thing blew up
lifted somewhere
42:00
Yeah, I had to leave it in the middle of middle Park like the richest
42:05
man school pick up memories were created.
42:10
And then my shoe broke. And so I was walking them to school from the place where it had broken down I was just crazy anyway, wherever you meant to be she came in and gifted me a car and it was amazing you know with no following but they believed in the community and might they have never to this day received so many emails and and and followers from that point on from from any other car partnership that they've done or not, you know, and then they came in, you know, with a card, a partnership after six months, you've got to swap it over to the next one. And that's just part of the how it works. So when they went to software for this one, I'm like, Look, can I pay for the wrapping of it? Yeah, look, I'll I'll give you some guidelines is my favourite photo of me logo high res
42:56
JNJ
42:57
surprise me.
43:00
They you know, wrapped it I paid for it. I wanted to because I thought let's offer these guys some value. You know, let's get your name on it. My name on it. Let's do some street team stuff. We're ready to have a shot. You know, let's let's go for
43:13
ice cold cans of coke in the back.
43:17
You always wanted to
43:19
the chop meal or the woman
43:21
the Pepsi vs coke. I loved that without the back and you would get like, I think was like mentors was
43:27
following. It was back in WA a radio street team car following it from my and then they pulled up and I was like crazy. I think it was 18 or 19. And then they open it. And there's a pack of six pack of Tip Top hot, hot dog just for the role.
43:48
For 20 K.
43:52
Got it. I've never done it again. After
43:53
that I worked on the street team and I remember we were in Franklin and this guy was there. He'd come from within town on the train. And he won a wheelbarrow and he took it home on the train
44:06
got more than you
44:15
would you do an upgrade of the rap? I mean, say yeah, I mean through where be master get a nice
44:28
Mitsubishi's everywhere be Mazda.
44:31
Christian, how and you
44:33
love that. My dream is to get us to on a poster together how
44:38
to become friends with Christian.
44:40
So Tanya Hennessy and I had been on stage on a panel probably a month earlier. And it was this not even this time last year, so we haven't even been friends a year. And we're at VidCon she invited me to drinks was staying at the same hotel. She invited me downstairs for drinks and I sat next to Christian and we like just started chatting like instantly can
44:59
imagine you guys getting
45:01
dressed. We were just waiting ourselves laughing and there was no pretentiousness. Yeah, I initially know like anything about Christian at that point. But it was funny enough, I had been filming something for a brand and they had said, Oh, we wanted to get Christian on this and it didn't happen. But I was like, Oh, yeah, cool. And all I knew was it was a guy that they wanted on the show that had a one week that was it. And then we just hit it off. And the next day, I think, you know, he messaged me now knowing Christian and how he's quite reserved in in a little while. And he messaged say, Hey, I'm going down for coffee if you'd like to come and now knowing that that that's not something that he would sort of go out of his way to do and we ended up spending the day to get I dragged him to every clothing store tried on 1000 outfits, he helped me spend a lot of money and went out for lunch and that was kind of it.
45:46
He's great. I love you two together on the show
45:49
be so much rather be so much
45:50
he is honestly you know, obviously on camera it's funny and we have fun and it's all true but off camera to you know being in Sweden when you were saying about the negativity from people you know and stuff when I met him to I was at that point where I was feeling quite lonely like Jesus, you know, the profile is growing yet. I'm you know, not being surrounded by a lot of professionals in the industry. And so his friendship came along right at a time where you know, I'll be always so grateful for that as well because it that's that's a true friend tree mate.
46:22
Yeah, and it's and it's more fun doing it with somebody else even if it's just consulting about what you're doing and what he's
46:28
doing. Yeah, and you know, he's busy man he sells out national tours him and Tanya got this killer show on the road so we don't see each other a huge amount so when we do is just bam we're on we don't have any time for any bullshit any insecurities. We just go for it and I love that I love I mean we travelled to New York for two weeks together
46:47
and that looked amazing I love the I love the fact that Christian walked away with the exact same coloured gemstones
46:58
sorry Michael Kors, which is a ride so fancy.
47:03
Apparently it's michael kors. I like course, I'm going with that. Yeah. And I I spent enough money were in there and I just turned into this absolute Soho new I don't know. You know, sometimes when you go into a store, I don't want to go into the stores. All of a sudden you think you're buying like you know, everything you buy and all the dresses, you never wear them again. All of a sudden, you're just you're in it and you buy everything. Well, that was me. And he was just like who? This person right now. And and then I said can you just try on like a couple of bits and pieces. Come on that don't have the champagne and really? Oh, yeah, no, they weren't? Yeah, yeah. And he was just sitting there on his phone acid Tron. Tron fucking job. Oh, by the job. Yeah. And then you try it on good luck this because it's $200 my kids cheap. I know. And then he looked fantastic. Yeah. He loves it. today.
48:02
Yeah. I mean, what's the what's your thoughts on faking it till you make it?
48:07
To a certain extent? Oh, definitely. So going back to the question about what I'm like at the school picker, you know what, you know, that. I remember really having that shift in my mentality around three years ago, where I thought, right, every day, and I just been rejected from a reality TV show. So I was down real down at that point. And I thought Jesus, and I hadn't even really been going for that long and had this real shift. And I thought, nah, this is it. I'm showing up every single day every day. I'm getting up hair makeup on. Like, it's like I'm walking into an interview every single day. And that's what I started doing. And for me, that was that shift and that is for me, like faking it till you make it. I don't think you can fake it about your skill set. Yeah, to be honest with that. If you aren't a TV presenter yet, that's okay. I'm I'm working towards being a TV presenter. Or you know what?
48:57
Acting like Oprah is how I felt like it mean even the energy that you bring in like, you Yeah, you do have an energy you come into the to the room, you bring an energy you you know, you come through the door. I think that there's there's something because that's real, even though you might be Yeah, yeah,
49:14
yeah. So you know, you can do little things like, you know, how you going to present yourself to the world every day? How you going to speak? How does your voicemail sound to people? What's your email, like, you know, like, all those kind of things. And I'm still working on my email is your voicemail
49:25
greeting By the way, your first
49:27
life? I had to change it because I sounded like I was 12. Hi, you've called me Lou. To the phone right now. That's how it used to be it was now it's like, Hi, you've reached me Lee. Like it's like, oh, bad.
49:39
I know you can I be test having to phone?
49:46
The phone thing I find very interesting, because it's sort of the vision of someone on the phone wheeling and dealing all that sort of thing. What the fuck you doing? I'm fine. That's what I'm curious about.
49:57
It's not actually it's fancies, what you think. So I, I got the second phone, because I was going to the ladies last year, and I was filming everything on my phone. And I thought my older phone was playing up and I was like, I could log is it's you know, I'd hashtag that dream for three years. And I was like, there is no way that phone is going to be my end. You know what I mean? And so I got the second phone with that. And then I found out that you know, my kids love YouTube. And so now it's this amazing cafe tool that I use when I go out and hang out and crazy. But what I didn't do well was a separate the numbers so now I just call anyone from any fine. They you know, it's sometimes it's kind of books that aren't have my haven't picked up to my mom, I'm gonna talk you up right now. It's
50:50
good. Are you doing debt collecting What's good?
50:54
Nowadays really good to film. So when I'm on an Insta live, I'll have one particular phone, I can show them stuff we can scroll together, which I really enjoy. You know, I can just show them something on the on the phone straightaway and
51:08
scroll together.
51:09
I like that idea. Just be on the
51:12
sea. So you could because you can film your phone.
51:15
Yeah. And and so I also do so I love doing this. And it's so stupid. But that's I guess that's how connected I feel with the lives as well. I'll do a storey and go Hey, guys, we're on the live everyone wave and like oh, little little did you actually really in it during we did the the photo shoot from the hotel room the other day, and we went live for that. And it was crazy. You know, there was so many hundreds of people on it. And we were actually shooting live and people just felt so like no just loving it. And I felt really rude. So I kept coming back to the phone going. I'm so sorry, guys, you know, I'm in the middle of a shoot, I've got to shoot I'm like, I'll just go do this. And I'll come back and what do you think and, you know, the live event, she went for the hour and ran out. But so many of the gorgeous community members were saying, don't worry about us. We're fine. We're happy to watch you just go Go do your work. Well watch you and and you can hear me say in the background. I'm really like, I feel a bit rude. Hang on, let's just talk to them for you know, I can't. And you know, reality probably says that I should just turned off the live and worked. But you know what? It's my clothes. It's my shoot.
52:19
You remind 150 games, you know sometimes and these are people right? And maybe they're you know them or you don't know them? How do you how do you work out? Who's your friend at that point when you're applying to because a lot of people I think a lot of people that don't have a following is replying to mom. Their Auntie you know, Jeff,
52:40
well, that none of them. I mean, I'll know if I'm replying to someone who's actually a personal friend of mine. So those hundred and 5200 a day are all community members. Yeah,
52:49
yeah. So they're not does it blur the line? Does it confuse you about friendship? Because I know, I think I'm confused you Josh.
52:55
Yeah, I couldn't.
52:57
Like, because some people just can't handle having a whole heap of friends. Yeah, like, I think for me, I've got a lot of acquaintances that I've, you know, been friends with for years. And I just, I assume the friendship when I see them, it's not like, we might not hang out all the time. But then I feel like Josh or like Christian, how, and I have friends and I feel like I'm that human, I the way that we talk
53:19
is very similar, which is like, there's a like a reserved part of it, which is, like just not needing that many friends.
53:26
I don't have a lot of close friends, you know, you know, I have my cool people and friends that have been, you know, friends with for over a decade or since I was a kid, I don't have a huge amount around me, I don't need that I love you know, being alone. That's something that, you know, in times when you're maybe mentally Not, not all, not at your best and you peak sometimes being alone can be, you know, not nice, and it can feel really lonely. But for majority of my life, being alone is is quite okay with me. So that doesn't worry me too much. And, you know, they are part of the community. So I do really see them as that as well. And I will always care about them. And they'll always come first in these decisions that I make, you know, around the me loves brand. But then when we get home and I'm sitting there alone, you know, that's my time. And I really value it as well. And no one will ever infiltrate that. You see people blur the lines you think about Yeah, Tom Cruise, huge celebrities, you think you know that? You rock up. And so they've built a career out of having rapport with the person watching. And so then sometimes, if you did bump into them, you know, oh, yeah, it happens all the time. And that is hard, because people will come up and want to give you a hug straightaway. And, but they'll know most of the time will stop you and stop themselves go. Oh my god, I just realise you don't know who I am. And I'm like, that's cool. Happens all the time. And, you know, my I think my goal in those situations is to make them feel comfortable. Because a lot of lot of the time they're kind of checking a little bit or a little bit nervy or the they're just a little it's, I wouldn't say this starstruck, I think it's more that It's surreal. When you see someone on TV, you think I know him from somewhere, you know, you don't always think oh my god, that's that person. Yeah. Jesus, I know him.
55:16
When I was 20
55:19
I mean, yeah, because you've built a rapport. Yeah, through your content. And so there in the moment, trying to understand what it all fucking means because you've emulated a friendship.
55:29
Yeah. And so you can't just go throwing it back in their face. Or you have to understand that that if that's you and your brand and who you are and how you show up to show up do it every day. So someone comes up to you and oh, my God, I you know, like, How you going how's the kids hi said, you know, the kids don't always understand it, that's fine. And then they don't need to, but with me, I can understand that's fine. I just, I and I always make the rule and all the all of the tribe know that I have one rule. If I'm yelling at my kids are in the middle of a bonding with Aaron, do not come up and introduce yourself because get in the way you will get injured. I am someone who, you know, if my kids run amok, I'm going to tell them or if you have we all had Bonnie's in public water I have. Yeah. And so if it's one of those real personal situations don't come up and not right now. You know what I mean? Like, maybe screenshot it and send it
56:21
to get people to like, the weird, like taking a photo view and then come up.
56:26
And I'm super proud that that's how they feel. Yeah, I'm super, super proud that I give off the impression that you can come up and that's what I want my I want you to have that quote. Because I've, I've felt it when I've had to either introduce myself to someone's especially back in the early years and say, Hey, you know, or just love to interview you or something and you get the shakes, and you feel nervous, and you don't get the real nice, friendly and you're like, Oh, Jesus, you're nothing like your Instagram, you know, and that I can feel really soul destroying. And I'm so proud that you know, these people don't feel like that me they can come up and say hi and and I feel comfortable enough to go Hey, hey, going, Oh my god, I'm running late for you know, school pickup, I gotta go. But it's so lovely to meet you. You want to grab a photo quickly. I gotta go like, you know, and it's
57:14
fine. Is it? Is it what you sign up for? When you start an account? And you build a community? Like he's? Because that, yeah, I had this was speaking to someone, an author once and I asked him a question about his book. And he kind of was like, a bit annoyed that I'd asked him like, how would I know? It was like, You wrote the fucking book. And I want to know what happened to the like, after the fact. And he was like, a bit annoyed that I'd asked about, like, you know, what has happened since you wrote it? And I was like, that's what you kind of as a creative you put that out into the world? Like, how can we why would not have this common sense of shared storey? And
57:52
I think it depends, I think it It depends. I don't think necessarily if you start can be a will a profile online that you unnecessarily sign up for, for that. Yeah. And that's okay. I you know, if you're a personal person, but you're sharing, I don't know, organising tips, but you don't really want to be out there, I think there's ways that you can still generate that content, still share it still show up. And and not have to have that being public profile, if you don't want to it is all in the way that you act. And so I guess it is all in the way of people's perception of you as well. Um, but yeah, I have signed up for that, because that's what I want. And I make it very clear
58:31
to your personality, I think, right? Who's I mean, some sort of us UFC fighter that would punch your head, and you probably don't want to approach him as much as you like, who is you know,
58:41
Sophie from far away? In the background? Yeah.
58:44
Where do you get your inspiration from? How do you sort of have the thoughts that you do have around what you want to do?
58:53
Oh, that's, that's a good one. It really depends on where I'm at. So like, we were saying, right at the beginning, it starts with maybe like a purpose, what I think I can do what I think I'm good at what will make me happy. It definitely is always that will be inspiring. Nowadays, it does stem around what I, what I feel from the community as well. And what I feel is right for where I'm headed as well. And I make that really clear. So that wouldn't never under under the impression like, Oh, she's doing it for us. No, no, it's too I'm still you know, I'm still following my dreams. I'm just sharing it with you. So maybe you're going to pluck that out and use that for yourself and grab that little piece of, you know, golden nuggets and and do it. So I think it's always about being inspired by by what you want. And then from there, that's where it becomes that contagious. Because you're not pointing the finger going, you should be inspired. You should do it like this. I'm just showing up every day.
59:47
Yeah. Do you feel happy? Yeah.
59:49
Yeah, I'm
59:50
stoked. Is that being always the case? Or is that something you've had to learn?
59:55
No, you know, I personally feel in this might be right or wrong, it I don't think there is a right or wrong answer. But for me, happiness is definitely a discipline, you know, and that's coming for, you know, I'm a suicide survivor. And, you know, I've been to that basement of hell. And that doesn't you don't just try, you know, you don't just come to a point where you think, okay, my life isn't worth living. You don't come from that, and then bounce straight back up. People. A lot of people think that and that's where we I think you can get dangerous, or you've hit rock bottom, you'll be fine. Now no, fucking know, your three more rock bottoms to go. Yeah, you know, so I, happiness takes a long time. Sometimes, you know, and sometimes you're really lucky in it, and it doesn't. But if you're one of those people that you are going up and down, the real key to that is to not be afraid of the downs, God made like that, that I think that's where a lot of that can come from a lot of the darkness and the thoughts can come from because you get scared you Daniel, I'm scared, I'm down. That's it, that's the infamy. But if we can start to understand, actually, this is when you're at your most brave, because you're going to work through this. And if we can start to look back and go shit, I was at a place, you know, that was so down, and I was so dark, you know, I just managed to get up and have a show that I just managed to, to get out that day. Rather than seeing that as a bad thing. Can we see it as well, that was a real act of courage. I am one brave motherfucker, you know, and then all of a sudden, we start to see all of these little acts of courage and bravery that we do, whether it's trying a new hairstyle, whether it's sitting in a chair and crying, reaching out for some help, saying, Hey, you know what, I'm not super happy in this relationship. Or I want to I want to career in TV presenting all of these things, a tiny little acts of courage. And I always say this, and that's what builds that foundation for for your confidence on who you are, can you identify when a high becomes so high, that it goes into that sort of manic state? Or like because I know that I sometimes feel so happy. And then I sort of start checking myself of like, I've identified that when I know my have these be highs? It's been
1:02:01
Yeah, and have that crash?
1:02:03
Yeah, you know, I think it I think you do, that's a really good word, identify it. And it takes practice, you know, like, like anything, right? It just takes practice. It's a muscle, your personality, your courage, your confidence, who you are, that's a body muscle. And, you know, I'm 40 years old, I just turned 40 years old. So you know, I spent years identifying what that is. And sometimes it can be an event, it can be a trauma, it can be substance abuse, like there's so many things that will either create that high or create that crash. And and as you get older, and you get a clear ahead, and you know, obviously a drug that substance abuse, but it's such a far gone thing for me, right? So with a clear head, you start to realise that for me, it's events, and it's it's always big highs that yet can lead to those lows. Now, are those lows a bad thing? No, you know what, it's just your body and your mind saying you need to rest now, you've just had a killer week, that was amazing. You're on stage in front of 2000 people, you need to have a little a little rest now. You know, 10 years guy, that little risk for me, was the definition of all I'm low. I'm not doing too good, you know? Whereas now like, No, no, you just need to recoup and rejuvenate.
1:03:10
How does that fit? within the context of a content strategy? How do you how do we strategize so that when we're in a low that we can actually give ourselves that time while still giving our community what they need.
1:03:26
You got to take care of yourself first, you know, you know, good to community, if you are pouring from an empty cup, or if you are sharing out stuff that again, is is slightly getting more on to the selfish side, you know what I mean? So you need to just take stop for a second, and your community will be there waiting feet, no one is going anywhere. Let you know, we need to remember that no one's going anywhere. We're all there. So I think for me, it really depends on the type of content you're used to pushing out. But for me, obviously my stuff is all real. Every everyday stuff. I don't pre record something in posted up later. Unless it's actually produced video that we know has been done. So for me, I just want two storeys do you make more? I'll get on there and go, Jesus, I am feeling low today. I'm out. I'm taking a nap. Gonna eat block chocolate. I'm out. You know, I'm happy to say that I feel good. I feel better already. Yes, yeah. But other people it might be that they do have that strategy. And they've got a bit of content up their sleeve, pop that on jona may want to put something on that you you know, a little RG tutorial that you made that you didn't think that was that good. If you're feeling the pressure you need to check it out might not be your best work. But you never know. You
1:04:32
might go crazy. I feel like it's hard to hide in these positions. We do a podcast every day you're on IJ TV into storey all over the place. It's like, but what I found is I would think that not being able to hide because doing something like this would mean you'd be showing it I think it's actually increased a consistency. And so but yeah, because we're forced to go, we gotta show up that I really do this thing. Yeah, we're not gonna be awesome.
1:05:01
What's putting the makeup on in our version? Right, which is like getting out the front door and doing it. Yeah. And yeah, it's sometimes because you can then through that momentum, actually get out. So that low isn't as being because you're actually Exactly.
1:05:20
I love that that, you know, I talked about that a lot. Can you know, we're not always inspired. And we're certainly not always motivated, or exactly the consistency. You don't have to be inspired or motivated to get out there and go for your daily walk or do the daily talk show. You just got to get out there and do it. You know, and sometimes when you push yourself at that point, hey, it's not going to be the best that I'm going to do it anyway. Those are those real moments of growth.
1:05:45
Yeah, absolutely. I love it. Yeah, I think it's a Seth Godin talks about authenticity, being overrated, in regards to a pilot is an authentic, he or she going to fly live the plan, whether they're feeling happy or sad. And I guess what we're doing is it's, it's the exact same way, like, we can be authentic, but we can also show up, you know, each and every day and find something in that cup as well.
1:06:13
Exactly. And that is authentic in itself as well, right? Yeah, we're not yet Can I just I love that you brought that up? Because it really I talk a lot about I used to talk a lot about it. When I first started was that really finding the joy of the 90% of living? So you know, you get your hundred percent needed? 10%? Is the glossy magazine cover the TV show this part? This part is the 10% The 90% is you making all of this clouding behind us, you know, like getting the shirts made, you know, having to save up the money to get the merge all of those kind of things, having the awkward conversations with your parents, we burn it off your mom. Yeah. You know that that's the 90%. And for a while there that 90% really sucked me because I was good. But then something hit me. And it was when I was auditioning I, again, it was straight after I'd had that sort of not back from new reality TV. And I was going for the first audition since that not back. Now. Something hit me just before I went in, I was like, I'm auditioning, which means I'm actually living my dream right now. Because 90% of what you do is audition, you know and so it then it switched for me. Right? Right then in there it completely switch. And that's when the showing up every day, right? I mean, every day is an audition, I'm just there. And this 90% is joyous. And I'm grateful to be living it
1:07:27
was part of the show. It's part of the the whole thing, right? Like
1:07:31
attempts in the 90%. Yeah, doesn't have
1:07:33
Yeah, I remember the joy of, I always push back on doing my washing and shit like that. And I just had a moment of like, doing my washing and being present in that moment. And being like, actually, this is like the bit that makes me like a huge, like, we can have all the big dreams in the world. But if we were not fucking washing our socks, then not we're not serving that 90% as well.
1:07:55
Exactly. And it comes back to you know, that gratitude, you know, and sometimes we all get swept up. Oh my god, life is so hard. And we've had a few knocks and things have happened, the bills have coming or whatever. And you sitting there going, why was me. But if you can scale it back for a second and just be grateful for something simple minds, always clean water and hot running water, warm home like those and that makes me smile instantly smiling straightaway. And I've always had that one for some reason. And I remember thinking it when I was like 21 Oh my God, I've got clean water. I think my dad's from Kenya and my mom's from Vietnam. So I've always heard those storeys of you know, not having those things so accessible. And so something like that will just snowball into thinking about other things that you're grateful for big or small, and they kind of get bigger and you realise Wow, shit. It's all right. We're okay.
1:08:40
I mean, you are inspiring. I know that Tommy and I are constantly referencing you when we when we say you know what could be possible.
1:08:49
I think you're the poster girl of picking yourself. You've created everything by picking up the phone now you just got to have it up. But you've decided I'm going to do this yeah, it's gonna be me deciding to do it and making it happen.
1:09:00
Yeah, I'm really thankful. Thank you so
1:09:02
much for being on the daily talk show. Height the daily talk show.com is the email address if you want to send us an email if you enjoyed the show, take a screen grab share it on Instagram also tag up me Lou as well me Lou loves calm is the website. Right? And you can get all the dresses. I know like that photoshoot that you're doing. Is that a whole new range?
1:09:21
Yeah, amazing. whole new collection. It's It's insane. It's It's so beautiful.
1:09:26
Amazing. Well, yeah, definitely check that out too. Otherwise, we're sending our guys so you guys, thank you.