Happy Harry Is Back

Tommy: The Daily Talk Show.

Josh: It's The Daily Talk Show, episode 593.

Tommy: We got Happy Harry.

Harry: You can't get rid of me, can you?

Tommy: You do one week of work experience and we want you for life. Welcome back, Happy Harry.

Josh: Now, you were listening to Neil Mitchell. What was he talking about?

Harry: I was listening to Neil Mitchell this morning and he was going on, they can't sell tickets to go and see Bardi.

Josh: Why?

Harry: Why? I don't know, they're $70 and they're just not filling up the stadium apparently.

Tommy: Wow, is that so bad?

Harry: So we should go down and have a bit of a Party, party.

Tommy: Who told us that? Grace did yesterday.

Josh: Is that a common—

Harry: It's a trending hashtag.

Tommy: Yeah, I love that. I mean, it's all firing here. Mr. 97 said, I ate pasta yesterday. There's lots of banter going on. But if I can relate to that, I ate pasta last night.

Harry: Did you?

Tommy: Went to a— went to— and we should all go there— went to a—

Josh: La Porchetta?

Tommy: No, no, no, no. The Veneto Club in Bulleen.

Josh: Veneto Club.

Tommy: Veneto Club.

Josh: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Veneto Club for today's game between the Blackburn Vikings And the Dandenong Rangers, let's get them on the court first.

Tommy: The Dandenong Rangers. Is there a basketball court at the Veneto?

Josh: Yeah, that's where I—

Tommy: That must be out the back.

Josh: You know, that's where I—

Tommy: Is it?

Josh: Court announced.

Mason: Is it?

Harry: Yeah.

Mason: No, no, no.

Josh: And so I would get the best part about court announcing at the basketball at the Veneto Club was the pokies. No, not the pokies. They had the best spread afterwards, like pizza, like square, like rectangular pizzas.

Harry: So what does a court announcer say? Like, there wouldn't be too much to say, I don't imagine.

Tommy: Court announcing, bringing players out. It's not a referee.

Josh: Uh, so it's— I would just say, yeah, two points.

Harry: Commentating.

Josh: Yeah, two points, number 7, Harry Lodge.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah, happy Harry Lodge.

Josh: Happy Harry from the three-point line. You'd never commentate like that. You would never commentate like that. Like, I was quite conservative. I didn't play— the worst thing I ever did was, um, just playing the wrong music at the end of games. Yeah, so like, you never play We Are the Champions when it's mid-season.

Tommy: I mean, that's a fun fact about the Veneto Club for you. There's a probably— it might be more fun fact than Josh Jansen once commentated or once court announced.

Josh: More than 50 games.

Tommy: There is, there is a gondola at the Veneto Club. It's like out the front. It is one of only two gondolas outside of Venice. It came from Venice and is on display. Look it up, Mr. Nice Guy.

Josh: You want us to believe that there's only two gondolas outside of—

Tommy: maybe in Australia.

Josh: I feel like I've seen Yeah, but I'm talking about legit from Venice.

Tommy: So taken, uh, like it's legally out of the water. I mean, they're big motherfucking things. It'd be hard to steal that thing.

Harry: There was— we were in Warrnambool a few weeks ago and there was a full-on— they were craning— craning, is that the verb? Yeah, craning a yacht out of the water. Have you seen the underside of a yacht?

Tommy: It goes down quite deep, doesn't it?

Harry: Really deep. And the fella was telling me that you got to be— well, he—

Josh: what, the crane driver?

Tommy: You're just talking about— can you just go, "Mad Terry here." Beep, beep.

Harry: No, well, apparently you've got to be careful of all the coral and stuff on the bottom sometimes.

Tommy: I mean, this is why they have the things that tell you exactly the depth and the stuff that's coming up, so you can tell if there's like a coral bank coming up. It's interesting. Any, any weirdness in '97 on the Veneto Club's thingo?

Mason: They've got a whole like dining space called La Gondola.

Tommy: Yeah, but out the front is a gondola. It's at the front.

Harry: Is it in water?

Tommy: Saw it. Not in water.

Josh: Is that turned into like a, um, somewhere you can eat?

Tommy: No, I think it's like, get a little photo.

Josh: Oh really? Little shuckers outside or inside?

Tommy: Outside. It's huge, dude. It's the size of our— it's like the length of this room.

Josh: Really?

Tommy: One thing about the Veneto Club though, just, just quickly.

Josh: Is this a live rate?

Tommy: Yeah, it's definitely not a live rate. It's more of an apology.

Harry: What happened to no pay, no say? Is it Look, no pay still, say.

Tommy: Well, it's a good establishment, but it's almost an apology because I was waiting. We went in there, went into the bistro, sat down, and I'm just like, this young waiter is ignoring us. Like, I started, you know, like, I got through the bread on the table. I was like, it was nice with the bread, but the bread's now run out and I want to order my food. I'm just— I didn't whistle him, I was just like waving because we had some rapport, which I thought we had rapport, but he kept on ignoring me.

Josh: He didn't work there.

Tommy: I was like, mate, no, he worked there. He took us to the table number 44.

Josh: Good spot.

Tommy: He said, you're gonna be out by 7:30.

Josh: Near the bocce?

Tommy: Uh, near the kids play equipment. Anyway, I was like, oi, and he came up and he said, I said, oh mate, I'll just have— he said, you, uh, it's a bistro, you go and order at the front.

Josh: Fucking idiot. That's fair. That's a great, uh, place. Maybe, maybe Bree and I go there tonight for dinner.

Tommy: Dude, it was—

Josh: Do they do a Thursday night dinner?

Tommy: They do every night. The joint's open till like 3 AM.

Josh: Seems like the kind of place where I could drink a Shiraz.

Tommy: Mate, there's Shiraz on tap. What? Pinot Noir on tap. Red wine. I mean, we're talking about this only the other day. Yesterday it was like, how chilled is it in the beer tap? Like, so you got like Peroni, whatever it is, and then you had a white wine and a red wine. The red wine was Pinot. I didn't get it, but I think it'd be nice.

Harry: It doesn't— can't— doesn't wine need to stay settled and not be disrupted for like To taste good?

Tommy: Well, I see what you mean, but I think it's not fizzy, Harry. It's not pushing it out as a fizz. It's actually just a stream. Yeah, it's like a stream of peanut. It's interesting. I mean, when was the last time you had a little drink, little beverage, Harry?

Harry: At yours, at that cheap wine.

Josh: That's right.

Harry: It wasn't a good wine.

Josh: Haz stayed at my place and, uh, you're over 18, right, Haz? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's sort of weird if all of a sudden I'm having— I've invited Happy Harry to our place and then I'm like, yeah, mate, like I know you're a little bit underage, but have a wine with Joshy. No, but you asked me, Harry, to stay over and I said yes, that's fine. We ended up actually watching The Wiggles.

Harry: Yeah. And then, God.

Tommy: Oh, is this the bloke when he had the—

Harry: And then he wrecked it.

Tommy: Well, he wrecked it.

Josh: We went to bed before him. Yeah. Anyway, the guy had a heart attack. What is it called?

Harry: Cardiac arrest.

Tommy: Yes. Yeah, I appreciate Harry.

Harry: My sister tagged me in this post. I'm not sure. This is probably going to wreck, totally wreck my image, my public image.

Tommy: What, are you going to get cancelled?

Harry: No, it was a toot toot chugga chugga CPR. They finished the show with toot toot chugga chugga CPR.

Josh: No, they did actually. Hot Potato was their last song.

Tommy: It takes away from Harry.

Josh: Yeah, I get it.

Harry: She tagged me in it.

Josh: I think, what were you just saying? The wine? Yeah, so going there, did you get a parma or pizza? No, I ended up I got a pasta.

Tommy: That's right. And then I was meant to share and I had— Amy didn't really want any.

Josh: She didn't have olives in it?

Tommy: No, it was like a seafood pasta. It was so good, dude. It's like, it's quite Italian, that joint.

Josh: What sort of seafood?

Tommy: No, it was seafood. It was mussels. I think it's just mussels, like a mussel pasta. Yeah, it was so good, dude. Gotta go there.

Josh: I'm just not like— because even Amy over the weekend got a dish like it was, she said it was delicious. It was at the Beach House in Geelong. But mussels, a lot of admin. It's almost like you've got 20 dishes and you're having to individually grab each one.

Tommy: I mean, but I mean, you mentioned something about this. I'm that someone, someone in your life was trying to get better at it. But for me, like, I find myself like if I sway, if I, if I have the mindset of I'll get something else on this menu, which I don't really know. But then I, it's like I set myself up for disappointment and I'm like, ah, fuck, I'm looking around getting like food envy, food envy. I'm just like, ah, fuck that. But I like, I want to challenge that feeling of—

Josh: So you want to get the thing that is controversial?

Tommy: Almost. Once in America, I was like, 2012, I think, 2012, great year, driving through Santa Barbara, maybe.

Josh: Great place.

Tommy: Heard about a great, great muffin shop, like a what are they called? Um, cupcake shop. Muffin. There's no muffin. Oh, Muffin Break. Yeah, cupcakes. There's more cupcake stores than muffin stores. Is it because all the cupcakes are like mini cakes and they're kind of cute and muffins—

Josh: is there a lot of margin in the icing?

Tommy: They must. I don't know.

Josh: Well, because you've never seen a muffin shop survive, but you've seen many cupcakes.

Tommy: Many cupcake stores. And I was trying to, and it was in the year, that year, 2012, great year. I was I won that trip to LA where I was in this house and I was the winner. And I was— there was a bunch of contestants, not contestants, but—

Josh: Were you on a reality show?

Tommy: It felt like it. Attendees of this course. And the mantra I had going in, it's not really a mantra. I was like, I'll put my hand up first for everything.

Josh: Oh, that's right.

Tommy: Absolutely everything.

Josh: And I thought you were going to say I'm going to fuck everyone in this house. I know, but I did that too.

Tommy: No, no. I was there to work, Josh. So the thing about putting your hand up first on everything, you get noticed more. You're either really annoying or you actually do a great job and pay and sort of like you— it's a, it's a thing that creates a vision of confidence, or people see it as you're a confident guy.

Josh: Annoying too, or a bit annoying.

Tommy: I like to think that I came off as annoying. No, no, this guy's a real go-getter, look at him. Oh wow.

Josh: Yeah, I think, you know, I like that idea.

Tommy: My point around the muffin thing was I want to do what everyone doesn't like to do. And so I said to the lady at the muffin place, which is your worst muffin? Which one's the least favourite here?

Josh: Really? Yeah. Where do you— oh, this was at the—

Tommy: at the muffin store?

Josh: At the—

Tommy: oh, the muffin store.

Josh: In Santa Barbara.

Tommy: Santa Barbara. It was a cupcake store.

Josh: And what'd she say?

Tommy: She said, ah, that one, the zucchini one. And I was like, okay, I'll get that one.

Mason: Was it the worst one?

Tommy: No, definitely not. Because it's like if you actually, you know, there's like the— Harry, you'd have them. They're quite a, like a regional biscuit. You know, you get the variety.

Harry: No, Arnotts. Oh yeah, no, the tin.

Tommy: Well, you can get them in tin or you can— Josh, you've probably had more experience.

Josh: Just like bags. Yeah, tin, I guess.

Tommy: Just like the one that's got—

Harry: Just like a plastic tray.

Tommy: Chocolate biscuit. It's got one with sort of that jam in the middle.

Josh: Arnotts Allsorts.

Tommy: Okay.

Harry: Yeah.

Tommy: Something like that. Something.

Harry: Anyway.

Tommy: There is a biscuit that's always left for everybody. Leaves it.

Harry: Yeah.

Tommy: But I'm saying if you like that biscuit or favourites, favourites. If that becomes your favourite. Oh yeah, dude, you've always got biscuits.

Josh: I've always—

Harry: Black jelly beans. Yeah.

Josh: I mean, that's the thing you get. I have gotten very good at liking the shit that other people don't. Green and yellow lollies. I remember like you'd have a party and the next day you'd wake up and there'd be a bowl of lollies and there'd be just the green and yellow ones at the bottom. And I was just like, what parties are you going to, mate?

Tommy: It was all about how many Coronas left in the fridge. No, like Mum and Dad, like when I was a kid, young, there was a lot of—

Josh: no, not even young, like my parents used to do like, you know, Hawaiian shirt, happy 18th is party mix.

Tommy: Or no, did they do parties?

Josh: Yeah, they were big into the party drinks.

Tommy: Or because my parents never party.

Josh: Yeah, so they would do like, no, not so much, uh, not drinking like Gem Queen Gronkh, more, more like a theme. So it'd be like Hawaiian-themed party. So we'd all be wearing Hawaiian shirts.

Harry: Okay. I like that. I like that.

Josh: But they still— Mum and Dad haven't gotten the memo around Australia Day.

Tommy: They still like to party.

Josh: There was a photo on Facebook and they've, they've taken an extremely large flag.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: Sort of taken a photo with it.

Tommy: And you know what I said to Mason when we were Mr. 97, when we were down in Geelong and it was Australia Day.

Josh: Oh yeah.

Tommy: And there was shitloads of people celebrating Australia Day. I said the good thing about this is you're seeing outside of the bubble because if you're progressive, you ain't celebrating Australia Day, but you're also not— there's other people that are doing the opposite. And so it's like, it's just interesting to see that.

Josh: And so I just wish that there was like a clear line where we're like, okay, let's make it May 8th. Like a mate. Yeah.

Tommy: And yeah, because I'm sure the Bogans would bloody fucking celebrate on that day too.

Harry: Exactly.

Josh: They don't give a fuck as long as they get the public holiday.

Tommy: Someone needs to come out and do like a good branding.

Josh: Not the mum and dad at Bogans.

Harry: What we need is a—

Josh: But they did take a photo of their whole spread and included that jellyfish.

Harry: Oh, we're back to your parents?

Josh: Yeah.

Harry: Yeah.

Josh: We're done now though. That was—

Mason: I was done.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: You don't want to give them too much. Did he actually do the thing?

Mason: Yeah. I saw it.

Josh: They're going to wrap up.

Mason: No, I saw it.

Tommy: Great, let's move on. Harry, I'm good that I've got you here. It's not a happy situation with the coronavirus, is it, mate?

Harry: No, no. I went into the chemist today.

Josh: It sounds like a bit of a rave.

Tommy: Emporium. And the city.

Harry: Yeah, New Chemist.

Tommy: Fancy place to go to the chemist.

Harry: I kid you not, we're all wearing the big masks. I was the only one in there. Oh, and then they saw me and they're like, oh, and took all their masks off. Oh, so I started sneezing and carrying on. Put them back on.

Josh: What were you getting at the chemist?

Harry: Um, deodorant, because it's really hot. It's so hot.

Mason: Do you usually wear deodorant?

Harry: I tend to, yeah.

Tommy: I tend to.

Harry: Don't— can't you?

Josh: What sort of— what brand?

Harry: Uh, the one that starts with R. That one.

Tommy: Um, and so you think these people are worried about the coronavirus?

Harry: Yeah, but What really grinded my gears was they put sticky tape on the top of the deodorant bottle so I can't open it.

Tommy: Do you want me to open it, son?

Harry: Yes, please.

Josh: Is it spray or is it, um, no, sticky tape?

Harry: Yeah, they put sticky tape around the top. So then I, so I bought it.

Josh: Oh, do you know why?

Tommy: Do you know why? Because they're stopping drunks from spraying and coming in and going, shh, let me just—

Harry: Oh, because then I started to fret thinking that it was like somebody's returned it and I'm like, I don't want someone else's deodorant.

Tommy: Was it, were all of them sticky taped up?

Harry: I'm not sure.

Tommy: I just— well, you went with this.

Harry: I didn't have my glasses at that point. I didn't see that. Yeah, there was sticky tape until I had my glasses.

Josh: You're not, um, you're not going to be able to spray it in here.

Harry: No.

Tommy: Well, you can, Harry.

Harry: I wasn't going to. Well, I didn't want to just spray it at the Emporium either.

Josh: Garage.

Mason: Garage.

Tommy: Garage. Garage.

Mason: Tomatoes in the garage.

Harry: Garage.

Tommy: The bloody—

Josh: what are you saying?

Harry: Carport.

Josh: Carport. Carport.

Tommy: And so, uh, how are you feeling? What do you think about the coronavirus?

Harry: Oh, I think people— well, I don't want to say what Michael Jordan— Jordan Michael Eady said about it this morning. He was brave.

Tommy: Well, he did say that 4 days ago, 5 days ago, when there wasn't 4,000 people infected.

Josh: 5,000 cases now.

Harry: I don't want to comment on it because knowing my luck, I would say, oh, it's nothing to worry about, and then it becomes the biggest killer.

Tommy: Well, I mean, we don't know if it will. They're trying to contain it. There's a place, so in Victoria there's one case or two cases.

Josh: Yep.

Tommy: Uh, the Golden Door in Box Hill, a Chinese restaurant, has had to close their doors. Someone was there that had it.

Harry: Uh, well, they're bringing all the people home from Wuhan that are Australian.

Josh: I wonder how it compares to all the others. It's like all the other, like, things that have spread before, like Ebola.

Tommy: Yeah, well, I told you boys that I've been watching that pandemic show. I think they must have pushed it up, or it's just come out, like, great timing for them because there's a lot of people thinking, fuck, what's this all about? Then they go to Netflix and you're watching something and learning shit like this. Uh, H1N1, so the flu virus, it was, it was an absolute pandemic back in—

Josh: What does a pandemic mean?

Tommy: Look it up. I don't know. The pandemic would be like a world— A widespread disease, a widespread virus. Pandemic. So like pan meaning cross, cross the, uh, Pacific. I don't know.

Mason: Yeah, so it's a disease that's spread across a large region.

Harry: So what's pain?

Tommy: That was worldwide pandemic. Anyway, H1N1 virus Pan means all and it comes from Greek origin.

Harry: So like a prefix or whatever it's called.

Tommy: So after World War II, more people died from H1N1.

Harry: I'm sorry, but what's the pan in pantomimes mean then? Is there— does that have a meaning?

Mason: Maybe it comes from a different origin.

Josh: Can you look at the origin of pantomime?

Harry: Sorry.

Tommy: Yeah.

Harry: I've gone—

Tommy: Can I deliver my fact?

Harry: Yeah, sorry. Continue.

Tommy: More people died from the flu, H1N1. Than World War I, World War II combined, plus some. And that was only— what was that, the '20s? No, 1907, probably the '30s after World War II finished, maybe later. But I mean, that wasn't that long ago.

Harry: But can you compare that to World War I and World War II?

Josh: Commercial Radio Australia would do a ranker and put them all together.

Harry: You and that bloody ranker.

Josh: That's the only thing I'm saying.

Tommy: Yeah, anyway, Josh says I won't bring up the ranker, and who's the only wanker that brought up the ranker?

Josh: I actually thought about a t-shirt, unrankable, but not doing anything.

Mason: Jamesy says at the moment, uh, it's got roughly a 3% mortality rate. Lara says the media has hyped up the virus way too much for clicks and engagement. Also, uh, Gem says, what does drinking like Gem mean?

Josh: Yeah, you know what drinking like Gem means. Um, And so does your liver.

Tommy: Your glasses.

Harry: Yes. Oh, these bloody glasses. I've had it.

Josh: So the other day when you stayed at my joint, was that a week ago or two weeks ago?

Harry: I don't know.

Tommy: Two weeks ago.

Josh: Your glasses were falling apart.

Harry: Yeah. So I've got these Oakleys glasses.

Josh: Wouldn't have said the brand, but go on.

Tommy: I pay no cents.

Harry: I'm going to call them out for it. They are shit.

Josh: We only do that on Tuesdays.

Harry: What about Thursday? Can you do it on Thursday too?

Tommy: Oh yeah, take down.

Josh: Throwdown Thursday.

Harry: Sounds like we're supposed to be dancing or something.

Josh: No, throwdowns. You're gone.

Harry: Yeah, they fall apart. Like, they're like my grandfather's axe.

Josh: Like, you've said this before. Have you said this on the show before?

Tommy: No.

Josh: What does it mean?

Harry: It's like, um, like my grandfather's axe has had 3 heads and 3 handles, but it's still the same axe.

Tommy: Oh yeah, because you change it, but you still— you've got the hand and then you change the handle.

Josh: It's not actually your grandpa's Like it's a made-up story.

Harry: Yeah. Josh goes, why? What happened to your grandfather's axe? And I'm like, well, that's a saying.

Tommy: Well, he likes to sort of just push on that. Like when before you said—

Harry: What did I say before?

Tommy: You said something, then you— oh, it was the joke, the ABC. So the—

Josh: oh yeah, the hop, hitchhiker joke. I get a little bit bogged down. And so anyway, funny joke. So the— because he was fine.

Harry: Yeah, he's all good. I wouldn't have made it otherwise.

Tommy: Well, you didn't make it.

Mason: Someone— it was a meme. Well, Jem heard Sam Pang say that they're releasing a new song called Wake Up Greg.

Josh: That's also good.

Tommy: I think that, I reckon Greg would appreciate it. Yeah, he's like, how can I survive?

Josh: So that's pretty funny. Yeah, I think I would be, because if I nearly died, I think I'd want people to make jokes about it.

Tommy: Yeah, I mean, it depends on what happens.

Josh: So the Oakleys.

Harry: Yep.

Josh: So there was a, there was an issue with the, uh, one of the arms.

Harry: Yeah, the lady mentioned something about us.

Josh: I had the same lady today, so we went in there, so we We put some tape around it and then we went on the tram, which I don't do that much. It's because I haven't got my mic in.

Mason: Peeing on it or no?

Josh: It was fine until Harry started talking to a stranger. And then he said, and so he said g'day to this guy.

Harry: Oh, I don't remember this.

Josh: And then, then, then you said a stranger is—

Harry: Strangers are just friends you haven't met yet.

Josh: I said, but strangers also fucking rob your house, Harry, so watch your wallet.

Harry: But, um, anyway, he was a nice fella, but he wasn't helping.

Josh: So we went to OPSM, 10 AM they opened.

Harry: 5 stars, they are great.

Josh: You were happy with them?

Harry: I really like OPSM.

Josh: I wasn't happy at the start.

Harry: No, Josh interrupts and goes, Harry's protected by the Australian Consumer Law.

Josh: Well, that's not what I said. Ah, so I was listening to Harry. That's what I said. That's why I said, I said, I think the ACCC would cover Harry. Because the thing was, they were saying Harry had only had them for how long? 7 months?

Harry: 3 months.

Josh: 3 months. He was taking off his hoodie and that's when it happened. And they said, oh, look, it's going to cost you around $300. Your insurance, your warranty doesn't cover wear and tear. And I was like, and so Harry was like, oh, I'm very disappointed. Like, okay. I'm very disappointed. I was like, this isn't— like, I don't care that you're disappointed. And I said, aye, Triple C, just from the— I was just trying on glasses and just, aye, Triple C. And then, um, anyway, they said, okay, we'll get your number. And then they called you back.

Harry: They called me back, they said, we've ordered in a new frame and it's here. But then today they couldn't find the frame. They went through all the cupboards looking for me frame. And then, and that they asked around, have you seen a frame for Harry Lodge? And this lady goes, yeah, it's here. And pulls it out.

Josh: They're always in those drawers.

Harry: Yeah, they're never in the cupboard.

Josh: So true.

Tommy: Just on the stranger thing, is this— you like to talk to strangers?

Harry: No, he was a genuine— he was an older fella. I've got a thing with old people. Old people tend to really like me.

Tommy: You're an old soul.

Harry: Yeah, like I'm like a magnet because like I was on the train back from Warrnambool and I had an old lady who wouldn't let me sleep. She'd just talk, talk, talk, talk about her best friend. They go to plays and they travel the world together and she operates the switchboard at the hospital. I could write a biography. And then today on the train—

Tommy: unprompted, or she just flows on?

Harry: She just keeps going, keeps going. She slept for about 5 minutes.

Josh: What did you do in that time? Went through her purse?

Tommy: No, no, I need to be paid for this bullshit.

Harry: I collated my thoughts. And then today had the same thing. Another fella sitting there telling me how his suitcase wheels bugged it, but it's a new suitcase, so he's going to go to Spencer Street Outlet Centre and buy a new suitcase.

Josh: Do you tell your glasses story? Do you think if they're on a podcast right now, they're like, I'm just a magnet to young people. I had this one guy, he just kept going on because I don't have a chance to talk. Really?

Tommy: And so do you think these people, they're thinking, if I see someone on the train, I'm gonna talk to them?

Harry: I think so, because that's how they would have grown up.

Josh: I think you provoke them.

Harry: Do what?

Tommy: Well, yeah, I mean, giving—

Josh: g'day—

Tommy: giving eye contact. G'day, how you going?

Josh: Which I think is lovely. I think that part of it, like, it's very disarming But you, you're obviously open to the conversation.

Tommy: Did you make any comment about his suitcase today? Like before he told you?

Harry: Before? No, I just sat there and then I said, I'm supposed to sit there because he had his bag on the seat. And he goes, oh, it's all right, I'm supposed to be sitting up the back, but I can't get there because my suitcase wheels buggered. And then you get— then you get—

Tommy: and then you launch snowballs. How long, how long did you chat with him for?

Harry: An hour and a half.

Tommy: I mean, I was on a train last time, I was on a train coming back from the city. That was just before, uh, just before Christmas. And this man and this woman were chatting and they didn't know each other, so I had that much information. But then this woman was telling the man about her husband and he was consoling her and she was saying, you know, he's— he had a stroke, he had some kind of heart thing, and the doctors said you need to start— well, they, they said to him, you need, uh She was saying, yeah, my husband won't listen, he won't take the medication. They were just having this like D&M. I was like, they're gonna root tonight. I did, but they were like, they were getting real into it. Yeah, not intimate, they were getting into it.

Josh: But they were like, that's an intimate— like, you can have an intimate conversation.

Tommy: Well, I was thinking about her, what's that conversation with her husband like? I was telling this guy on the train, Brandon, you should take your medication. Yeah. 'Yeah, and you know, men don't listen.' That's what she— like, he was— it was this funny conversation. He was saying that, 'Yeah, man,' you know, almost like a friend would sort of like reassure your way of—

Josh: Did you want to defend the man? I feel like you would have been the type.

Tommy: No, no, I was just thinking, fuck it, like, I was thinking about myself and me telling— me sitting on a train talking about a problem that I've got with Amy with a complete stranger. 'Yeah, look, Amy and I, you know, it's been tough, but I don't know what you get out of it.' What I don't know what you want from it.

Josh: It's like if you can get close to that type of interaction. Yeah, but I think getting close to that interaction is powerful. Like if you can watch it, like when we were, we went to Ludovico Einaudi, which is this pianist at Sydney MyMusicBowl.

Tommy: Mate, you've made it if you can have 5,000 people there to watch you play piano.

Josh: Yeah. And the thing is, to be honest, one criticism at the beginning, not loud enough. Bit quiet. There was a helicopter over above and it was too noisy.

Harry: It's hard to mix outdoor venues. Because like sound, sound changes depending on the atmosphere. Like temperature affects sound, air pressure affects sound.

Josh: Well, don't have a music venue outside then, hey?

Tommy: It is true, you got to get close. I've seen the Chili Peppers there and I was close and it sounds good.

Josh: Chili Peppers, it was great. I went to that as well.

Harry: Anyway, were you on the grass or in the chairs?

Tommy: I was on the chairs down the front. Just quickly, yeah, just quickly, Mastercard got them quick, you know, you get in early with Mastercard. Anyway, everyone in front of us ran down to the front of the stage. We just stayed there, no one in front of us, and we're just like 30 metres from the stage.

Josh: Do you remember Hamar Superstar, the, um, support act?

Tommy: No.

Josh: He was outrageous. It was very good. Yeah, and everyone was booing him.

Tommy: Anyway, so you're at the—

Josh: yeah, so I was there and there was a clear situation where a guy had organised for him and two other people to, uh, to go to this pianist perform. And I think that he was interested in the woman that was there. However, that woman was interested in the other guy, and so they were canoodling, and he was— it was the saddest thing I've ever seen. He was just on his own, like he wasn't even— they had a rug and he'd sort of managed to get his ass off the rug as those two were cuddling, and he was eating a souvlaki And he was just fucking eyeballing like he was making out with the souvlaki, just fucking just thinking. And then he spent the rest of the time deleting photos off his phone.

Tommy: You're really fucking bored when you do that. That's aeroplane shit.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: And so you've got no Wi-Fi.

Josh: I felt bad, but that's all right.

Tommy: Do you eavesdrop? Eavesdrop?

Harry: Sometimes. Sometimes.

Tommy: It's different when the conversation's directly to you. You're just listening at that point.

Josh: Did you ever get in trouble? Because when I was a kid, I got in trouble for spying on my parents.

Harry: No, I've never spied. No, no, not really.

Tommy: Well, the way Josh did it, put a microphone in one room and ran a cord XLR through to another room and listened on his speaker.

Josh: Turn the amplifier up full.

Tommy: What are they talking about?

Josh: I can't remember, but Mum said, you are sick, when she found it. Because I'm sure I thought it was so cute. What's sick is what was going to be said, like a handheld mic and just ran it under to the couch. And so we just have it on the couch and then—

Harry: Like a dynamic mic?

Josh: Yeah.

Harry: How did you pick them up?

Josh: Because the amp was in a complete other room. You could go full volume with no feedback.

Tommy: It's so funny. Harry, how old are you now?

Harry: I'm 18.

Tommy: You're 18.

Harry: Going on 19.

Tommy: 19. Going on 48.

Harry: April.

Josh: Oh good, what date?

Mason: 14th.

Tommy: Great, I'll write that down. Can you put that in the camera? When you leave home, when you move out of home, probably this is probably going to happen later in like our age, late 20s, 30s, you've left a bunch of shit at your parents' place. Yep. And so they want to start, there's a time where they start, they've either watched the minimalist documentary Marie Kondo or they're just thinking, I'm fed up with your bullshit, I'm fed up with your bullshit, you've got too much stuff at my house. And so I'm in that moment right now where Mum is saying to me, she's even trying to pass off her shit. You guys want this? Like what? Plates? You want these?

Harry: That's started already.

Tommy: It's just staying in the house. You live in the same house?

Harry: I live in the same house, but they're getting rid of my shit like there's no tomorrow.

Josh: What sort of stuff?

Harry: So I've got— I was a hoarder. It was part of my OCD. I hoarded like crazy.

Tommy: What sort of stuff?

Harry: Yeah, yeah, light up prescription sign, like in-house shops out the front have the big signs.

Tommy: Prescription. It said prescription.

Harry: It said prescriptions. It was from our local chemist. Oh, I'll have that. And I've got old walking frames and cars and chimneys. I've got a chimney in the back of one of our little cars somewhere.

Tommy: Well, you do live on lots of acres. How many acres?

Harry: We wrote a song, so I— 2,014 acres. You wrote a song? What was the song? My sister and I rewrote Royals by Lorde and had all the facts about the farm in it. And that's the only way I can remember all this stuff.

Josh: Sing it to us.

Tommy: No, just say some facts at least.

Harry: 2014 acres and on the phone with Riverina Crop Care and everybody's like, it didn't rhyme.

Tommy: No, probably helps when the music's playing. Yeah, yeah. There is something about country properties, or as soon as you get out in the burbs there's a— it's like it must be required to have 5 cars in your front area.

Harry: Prescription signs, got to have prescription signs.

Tommy: That's weird. Anyway, Mum gave me something. She said— I went to her house on the weekend. Do you have— what is this? And she pulls out this t-shirt and she like opens it up, which I've got in my hands now, so watch the video.

Josh: So it's a purple monster. It looks like it'd be dusty. Is it dusty? Smell it.

Tommy: It smells like musky, like not Must like—

Josh: yeah, it smells like a book that I'd get from World of Books.

Tommy: Yeah, you know what, it actually— it's mum's, um, old chest of drawers.

Harry: Smells like, um, yeah, or the, um, the blowfly— not blowfly, the, the things you put in your cupboard to stop them off.

Tommy: Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, this was— look, it says, 'To Tommy, from Dexter,' someone else. Anyway, The Offspring.

Josh: Sick.

Tommy: This is from the band The Offspring. Do you know who they are, Harry?

Harry: Never heard of them.

Tommy: Oh wow.

Josh: Pretty Fly for a White Guy.

Tommy: No idea. Anyway, first concert I went to was The Offspring, and I thought they signed it. And well, my friend's dad was this— he's, um, sound engineer, did their album. And so how many t-shirts do you reckon he got signed? He just got me and Matt, the kid. He's the guy's son. And so I don't know, I'm sure they signed a bunch, but this was But can you find out when The Offspring came to Australia? Like, this would have been 2003, early 2000s, 2000-something. So this was my first ever concert. I was in grade 6. It was at Rod Laver Arena. And at my ears, I just remember, you know, when you come home and your ears are just ringing. I was so young. I was on the, on the, on the, um, what do you call it, mosh, like off to the side. And it was a good experience. And so anyway, that's what this is, and I wanted to show you guys.

Harry: I've only been to One Direction. That's my Valentine's Day 2015.

Tommy: What'd you say?

Harry: I've only been to One Direction Valentine's Day 2015.

Josh: I beg your pardon, say it again.

Harry: Hang on, am I missing something?

Josh: No, say it again. Where, what, when was it?

Harry: Valentine's Day.

Josh: No, it's Valentine's Day.

Tommy: Oh, Valentine's.

Harry: Valentine's.

Tommy: I quite like the way you say it though. My son's middle name is Valentine because he was born on Valentine's say. I'm gonna start calling him Bodhi Valentine.

Josh: Any other words that you fucked up?

Harry: I do it all the time. There's lots. And then I can't remember the meaning of words, so I get them confused, like the pantomime and the bloody whatever you were saying before.

Josh: Pandemic.

Harry: Pandemic. I just— mine goes two different directions.

Josh: Did you find out what pan was?

Harry: Yeah, yeah.

Tommy: Oh, that's for the pantomime.

Josh: Yeah, well, just see what it was.

Harry: He said it was Greek or something.

Tommy: It was Greek Uh, whatever that word is.

Mason: I just, just quickly on the, um, the tour stuff, 2004.

Tommy: 2004.

Mason: Yeah.

Tommy: How old was I? 8. 8. 8.

Josh: You don't know how to count. I was—

Tommy: oh, sorry, 8.

Josh: You're 16.

Tommy: 5.

Harry: Yeah, 6. Yeah, I was—

Tommy: I was— oh yeah, yeah.

Josh: How old was I?

Harry: Huh?

Tommy: You were 16. No, no, no, no, that's wrong. If, if it was—

Josh: don't get angry.

Tommy: Oh no, only because I was—

Josh: oh no, no, maybe no. So I would have been, I would have been 14, so you'd have been 16.

Tommy: I didn't go when I was 16. I was smoking bongs at 16 and I wasn't friends with this kid at that age. So cheque when they came, there would have been—

Josh: isn't he cool?

Tommy: No, but it's, it's the only way I can reference.

Josh: So it's '90s, so if you think it was like '98, you would have been, uh, '96.

Harry: Post-bongs, that's heavy.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah.

Josh: What was it like before?

Tommy: '11, '10, '11.

Harry: Before Christian era, another year.

Josh: BG, before bong, no, before BB, before bongs, or AB, after bongs.

Tommy: We're in the AB stage now, boys.

Josh: No, I appreciate that. Any, any words, Seb? So the thing is, what, um, look at that artwork. I'm trying to— so that would have been— oh yeah, this will tell you the t-shirt.

Tommy: Colbest Design. No, so the, um Maybe it was a—

Josh: was the America— I'm trying to think of the Welcome to Americana. Was Americana the album?

Tommy: No, it was Pretty Fly for a White Guy, like that era.

Josh: What year did that one—

Mason: in 2001.

Josh: When did Pretty Fly for a White Guy come out, Sebbs? Were they playing that song? You said they were.

Tommy: I mean, that's the— that was when I was into it then, and that song was 1998.

Mason: They released the song.

Tommy: Yeah, maybe it was '01. So how old was I? I was born in '88.

Josh: You would have been 13.

Tommy: Yeah, I still reckon I was younger. I reckon I might be— oh, what time? I could have been 12 then, grade 6. Fuck, it's young, isn't it?

Josh: It's not as young as that.

Harry: Yeah, do you still fit in the shirt?

Tommy: I don't know, but do you want to see me put it on?

Harry: Yes, please.

Tommy: I actually never wore it. I'll just put it over my top.

Josh: Not rig ready.

Tommy: No, no, no, it's not ready. It's next summer.

Harry: What's it say on the back? Bite me.

Tommy: Bite me.

Josh: Bite me. So here he's putting it on. Oh, fits real nice.

Harry: Nice and tight.

Josh: Yeah, it looks good. Looks— yeah, it looks shit. It looks shit. No, no, no, it's pretty funny. It looks— it looks like you're a dad going to a concert, especially with the neck. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It actually— white always brings out your tan.

Tommy: My tan?

Josh: Yeah, nothing healthy though about that. So, um, anything else, Ebs, before we go? Anyone in the, uh, the live chat?

Mason: Uh, I was just looking at the pan stuff. I can't find anything.

Josh: Really? Nothing?

Harry: I can look at that one.

Josh: I'll look.

Tommy: Harry said don't worry about it, so don't worry about it.

Josh: All right, guys, defined pan. Anything else, Ebs? Oh yeah, we've got, um, we want to thank Ventra IP as well. They're our web host. Uh, if you, uh, if you need web hosting or domain names, uh, Ventra IP, uh, is Australian owned and they provide 24-hour, 7-day-a-week support based in Melbourne. And, uh, if you use TDTS at checkout, you get 50% off your first—

Harry: what's that stand for?

Josh: At The Daily Talk Show.

Tommy: Thanks, Harry.

Josh: But if you use that, you get 50% off your first year of shared hosting. Which is exciting.

Harry: So what's the difference between shared hosting and just normal hosting?

Josh: Why are you asking questions? Uh, well, so shared hosting, shared hosting is good for, for most people if you've got a small website. Um, it's like rather than everyone having their own computer, their own server, which we have, uh, we have a VPS, so we have sort of like a, our own instance. Is that correct, Seb? Is that how you describe it? And, uh, in the case of shared you sort of all on one system.

Harry: Oh, you share.

Josh: Okay. But the main, the great thing about Venture IP is they're Australian based, so you can get on the phone if you have any issues, knock on their door if you're shitty. Oh yeah, I don't know if you can visit their HQ, but you could see all their tech staff there though. Yeah, you could tech support there. And they've also got, I guess you can if you want to help. Really?

Tommy: We'll be down there.

Josh: Encourage it. Yeah, yeah. We're going to do a show from there when? 7th of Feb. Yep. Episode 599? 601.

Mason: 601.

Tommy: Can you believe it, Harry? Next week's our 600th episode.

Harry: Yeah, that's quick.

Tommy: You pumped?

Harry: Yep. Oh, I'm keen.

Josh: What should we do for 600?

Harry: Sorry, wouldn't that be noisy in a server room?

Josh: No, we can't do it in the server room. They won't let us.

Harry: I was going to say, because that'll be horrible with all the fans. Yeah.

Josh: What should we do for 600? And cold. Ep 600.

Harry: Ep 600. Oh, I don't know. I'm not— oh, I don't know.

Josh: What about from the Veneto Club?

Harry: What about—

Josh: because we can— there's a basketball court, so we could play some basketball, maybe try and get Michelle Timms down.

Tommy: That'd be fun.

Mason: They do futsal there. That's where I played futsal.

Tommy: When did you last play?

Mason: 4 years ago.

Tommy: 3 years. That's where I— you can't say that's where I used to.

Mason: That's where I played football.

Tommy: That's where I played football.

Mason: Not play. I don't play football.

Tommy: I heard you say play and that's why. This is news to me. When did you play last?

Josh: 4 years ago.

Tommy: I love it.

Josh: Happy Harry, you're going to be in Melbourne soon.

Harry: Yes, making the move.

Tommy: Oh, you've locked it in?

Harry: Yep, 10th of Feb I'm moving. So I've just got to do a bit of few jobs before then.

Josh: What does that mean?

Mason: Bit of admin.

Harry: Yeah, yeah. What sort? Just getting my enrolment finished in my birth certificate.

Josh: So what was the issue with the birth certificate?

Harry: It just didn't register properly, so they said bring in a hard copy, and I said I can't really bring in a hard copy.

Josh: So why not?

Harry: Because I'm 4 hours away, so I can't just waltz in and—

Josh: ah, did you bring one now or no?

Harry: No, I didn't, because I ended up just uploading one to the website and that seemed to work.

Tommy: Good, congratulations.

Josh: Well, we should have you in a bunch if you, if you'll come in.

Harry: I can come in if you, if you're desperate.

Tommy: Perfect.

Josh: All right, uh, if you enjoyed the show, leave us a 5-star review on Apple Podcasts. Anything else, TJ?

Tommy: No, I reckon that's it, mate.

Josh: All right, great.

Tommy: Happy Thursday.

Josh: Yeah, see you tomorrow, guys.

Tommy: See you guys.