The Ultimate Australian Taste Test

Tommy: The Daily Talk Show.

Josh: It's The Daily Talk Show, episode 344.

Tommy: What's going on, guys?

Josh: Fat Friday, our biggest Fat Friday we've ever done.

Tommy: Biggest because we're going to consume the most amount of calories, or biggest because there's, there's 4 boys on the bench?

Josh: It's a full panel.

Tommy: You're used to being on the bench, so yeah, nothing, nothing's changed. Uh, 3D Dill is— if you're listening, he's here, present.

Dylan: Yeah, we made it.

Josh: No, remember, 3D Dill here.

Tommy: Nope. 3D Dill?

Dylan: Present.

Tommy: Mr. 97?

Mason: Present.

Tommy: Josh?

Josh: Present.

Tommy: Tommy? Present. Hey guys, so I'm in that mood today because I haven't eaten since breakfast and it's like lunch, it's lunchtime.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: And I don't fast like you, Josh, i.e., forget to eat. But we've got meat pies because today we're going Australiana because our main man 3D Dill's in town.

Josh: Yes.

Tommy: And he hasn't tried half of the cuisine that we have on offer.

Josh: The what?

Tommy: Cuisine.

Josh: You gotta get him watching Kath and Kim.

Tommy: Yeah, oh, you gotta. Do you even know what Kath and Kim is?

Dylan: No idea.

Josh: So this is a 100% Aussie beef pie.

Tommy: We don't need, we got these 'cause they were cheap today, which is also Australiana. Get 'em 'cause they're on spesh.

Josh: It says 1600. Do you reckon that like 4:00 PM? Do you think it means that if they're not consumed by 4:00 PM, you need to chuck 'em out?

Tommy: Most likely.

Josh: This says 16:30. It's currently 1 PM here.

Tommy: This is 16:32. We've got a soso roll here.

Josh: So the real question is who gets the 16 and who gets the 16:30?

Tommy: You know what, I'm taking chances. I'll take the 16.

Josh: Okay, 16. We'll give 3D Dill the 16:30.

Tommy: Sweet. So did you want some tomato sauce? Yeah, tom sauce.

Dylan: I don't know, does one typically eat it with tomato sauce?

Tommy: Yeah, definitely.

Josh: Good question. No, it's fair. All right, so we're going to open this. Is, um, I've also— so, uh, TJ, take a plate so we don't—

Tommy: yes.

Mason: Oh yeah, Josh, spill it everywhere.

Josh: Thank you. Uh, if there was, um, there was roles today, you're looking after sort of the hot food.

Tommy: Yeah, I was on hot food, you were on, um, the other stuff.

Josh: And so, uh, these are from 7-Eleven. How much did it cost? How was the— what was the total, uh, receipt for this?

Tommy: 10 bucks. It was a bargain. I saw as I got there, because it is, I haven't heard this, you got a message from Brianna and she said, uh, Friday, Pi Day at 7-Eleven. So then I saw a bloke walking in. I was, I was, you know, these specials are on, you're always a bit worried that all the bogan tradies have taken them all. They weren't, they were stocked. The one thing that, I must just be hungry, I was so annoyed by it and it's happening in Ubers and taxis The guy who served me when I was paying for these was on the phone and he wasn't, he wasn't, it wasn't a business call. You could totally tell he's just talking to a mate.

Josh: 7-Eleven?

Tommy: Just going like, and I was like, you can't do that. Uber drivers, they're talking to their, their bestie.

Josh: Uh, yeah, and you can't really hear that they're talking half the time. Yeah, but, uh, so the way 3D Dill— oh, that's how I would— that's not how I would have done it. So TJ has just put, um, the sauce evenly across.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: The pie.

Tommy: So dog's eye dead horse.

Dylan: What's your technique then?

Josh: So my technique, if mum was making me a pie, she would write my name on it. Oh, that's cool.

Tommy: She still does that, right?

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: And Bree still does that, right?

Josh: Exactly. So, but because they're not here today, I'm just—

Tommy: Baby can't spell. Yeah, he can't write his name.

Josh: So I'm just going for the classic sauce in the middle. And so then what? That's all you do.

Tommy: But hang on, it's— this seems silly. You've put a big dollop of sauce in the middle and so look, now I can do this. No, because you know, no, but you're just making it up as you go now because yes, if you spread it around, you're spreading it around really difficultly right now. It's fucked.

Josh: Yeah, but the thing is, um, I think I saw a Four and Twenty pie ad. Yeah, and that's how they did it with the Australian.

Tommy: You know, they also, uh, use oil for, um, I can't remember what ingredient it is, like in like commercials where they're making food and stuff, they replace one of it—

Josh: glue and shit—

Tommy: with, yeah, glue, oil. Anyway, this is a dog's eye with a bit of dead horse.

Josh: So can we all—

Tommy: pie with sauce.

Josh: So we're gonna— that's a very Scooter Derek thing to do.

Tommy: It is. Um, some freaks like my wife, she eats the guts of it and then eats the pastry. I think that— I think that—

Mason: no, that's, that's good. We do that at home.

Tommy: Yes, keep it at home. Don't do it here because it's absolutely repulsive. So anyway, I, I was saying I'm so hungry and it's got to this point and we've known, been known to just, uh, not do Fat Fridays unless we've had something to eat before because we almost had a meltdown before this episode. And Josh is— oh my God, he's finished his pie.

Josh: It's not true.

Tommy: If you're watching, you can see I'm close to it.

Josh: All right, so 3D Dill, this is your first bite of the meat pie.

Tommy: Yep, here we go. He's got some good teeth on him. It really came out like a horse then.

Josh: That's good, good. That's it.

Tommy: And he's even got a bit of sauce on his face. This is a full experience, great experience here.

Josh: The great thing is it's the perfect temperature to smash it hard because, um, if, if this is, uh, 3D Dill, a bit of a warning for if you're at the footy, be very careful because those things can be very hot and the sauce can actually, um, sting you.

Dylan: Yikes.

Tommy: So 3D deal. Yeah, a lot of young tradies growing up in Australia, uh, you know, there's something called smoko. Do you know what that is?

Mason: No.

Tommy: I wonder, I wonder if there is— it's just like a break in between breakfast and lunch. So it's good smoko, it's a building site thing. Let's go for smoko.

Josh: Back in the day you would have gone and had a ciggy.

Tommy: Yeah, it probably was a smoke. Yeah, legit, just smoking. But now it's like, smoker, we'll go get a, you know, dog's eye dead horse, smash it down with a Big M, which is what we've also— Josh was in charge of that and he's done well.

Josh: Yeah, Wayne emailed and said Chiko Rolls and Big M's is what you should get.

Tommy: We should say, Wayne, shout out to you, buddy. Sorry I didn't stop in the street. I haven't met you before, but I do know what you look like. I was walking— Dylan and I were walking down Victoria Street near our studio, and I'm looking at this bloke, he's familiar. I sort of get past, he's got headphones on, he says, g'day, Tom. And I was just a bit rattled, to be honest.

Josh: I thought it might have been your dealer from 2004.

Tommy: And then as I got further, I was like, that's Wayne. And I turned around and he— and I did say Wayne. He had noise-canceling headphones on, but he messaged us and said That was the weirdest thing because I'm listening to the Daily Talk Show and then you came past and then I walked past.

Josh: So, uh, we're starting on the pie. There is a—

Tommy: where are the— where are the Big M's? It's nice to have your heart.

Mason: Grab them out.

Tommy: Yeah, man, when I say Big M—

Josh: oh yeah, so we've got— I got, um, 4, uh, Big M's, all the same flavor.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: And then, uh, I got one that is a one finished. Oh, Dill, you were hungry. Yeah.

Dylan: I'm a little, I'm a little hungry. Yeah, a little, just a bit.

Josh: Yeah. And so, um, this is, uh, strawberry milk. Oh, Mr. 97's already complained.

Tommy: Why? Why is he complained? What's he complaining? What have you complained about?

Mason: Uh, I'm not too keen on the strawberry milk.

Tommy: Why?

Mason: You gotta go for chocolate on the Big M.

Dylan: Do you just not like the flavor? Is it like sugar in it or something?

Mason: Yeah, it looks pretty whack as well, like pink milk.

Josh: Yeah, yeah.

Mason: I mean, that chocolate milk is original. It literally says original on the packet as well.

Tommy: There's a film, I don't know if you saw it, Josh, you haven't seen many films, but you might have seen this one. I can't remember the name of it, but there's this pink drink in it and one guy gets so sick from drinking it and like projectile spewing pink milk drinks everywhere in this movie.

Josh: In Anchorman, who says milk was a bad choice.

Tommy: Oh yeah, milk was a bad choice. Milk is sometimes a real bad choice. So being hungover, milk for me was the greatest choice.

Josh: So I haven't had a Big M for over 10 years.

Tommy: Really? Shit. So, mm, smells good. So I reckon I've had one.

Josh: Have you shaken it?

Tommy: Yeah, I shook it.

Josh: It's like a milkshake then.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah. So it is a, it is a strawberry milkshake. It's got a health rating of 4.

Josh: How the fuck do these things get their health rating?

Tommy: Yeah, what does that even mean?

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: This has in it 25 grammes of sugar, which per 100ml— how many mils is this? What's the percentage? 300. It's got 8, 8, 16, 20. Yeah, so it's got— far out, 25. That's fucking wild.

Josh: A lot of— and so, um, for how it's—

Tommy: this is really small, 300ml.

Josh: If you're listening to, uh, this episode, I would definitely recommend this is one for the YouTube channel.

Tommy: Yeah, definitely. Like, we've got it otherwise, we've got a spread happening. But that just took me back.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: Um, 3D Deal, did you have a job as a kid? Like, were you quite young? Like your first job?

Dylan: Uh, no, not really.

Tommy: Because in Australia there was like paper rounds.

Dylan: Yeah, I did paper rounds with my parents.

Tommy: How old were you? Was it their job that you were taking along?

Dylan: It was their job. I might have been 8 or 9.

Tommy: Yeah, so yeah, I fucking— it was my job and I outsourced it to my mum.

Josh: She— I remember she did the other way around.

Tommy: Yeah, I did the other way around.

Josh: '97, have you tried any of that strawberry milk?

Mason: I had a little sip.

Josh: What'd you think?

Mason: It's a bit too sweet.

Josh: Yeah, okay, it's fine. Well, you're gonna love what's coming up.

Tommy: And so, deal, uh, I'd get my money, whatever it was, I think it was like $7, $8 an hour maybe. Yeah, probably like $16.50 for the whole shift, right? And I'd go to the bakery and I'd get myself, like, it would be early in the morning and I'd get like a Big M. It was just so good. And then I get 2 nanish tarts or 2 doughnuts and I just smash them.

Josh: This is what you would have seen with the Big M. The Big M bottles, I feel like, are a bit newer.

Mason: Yeah.

Josh: And so this is a Big M, like a milk carton, '97. Will you— if I give this to you— yeah, you've got to promise me you'll drink it, all of it. Yes.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: Okay, okay, great.

Mason: I have a question, I have a question though. That health star rating on there is a 3.5. On your chocolate one.

Tommy: On the chocolate.

Josh: Yeah, looky one. Ah, see, that's why you like it so much, it's naughty. Strawberry one's a 4. How the fuck does this system work? Strawberries, it's fruit. I mean, if we look at the back, what is big— what do we think? What do you reckon the top ingredients are, guys?

Tommy: Um, it would be milk solid, milk, so it'd be milk, and then sugar, and then flavoring. What am I— that's 3. What do you reckon?

Josh: Fresh reduced fat milk. Yes. Sugar.

Tommy: Sugar.

Josh: Natural flavors.

Tommy: Mate, got it.

Josh: Natural colors. 25% less fat versus regular fat-flavored milk with 3.4% fat. Um, how many times are they going to say fat?

Tommy: America gets a bad rap when it comes to food and what you can buy. 3D deal.

Josh: Yeah, what's like Canada— what's Canada like? Is it— are you guys as fat as the US?

Dylan: No, not by a long shot.

Josh: Okay, we've probably—

Dylan: the worst thing that we have is poutine.

Josh: Yeah. Oh, so that's how you say— I say poutine. It's poutine.

Dylan: Technically, from what I understand, it's called poutine.

Josh: Poutine.

Dylan: But 90% of the population says poutine because it's got the E at the end.

Tommy: Poutine.

Dylan: But apparently the proper way to pronounce it—

Mason: What is it?

Dylan: Is poutine. It's French fries, gravy, cheese curds, and kind of whatever else you want to throw on top of it.

Tommy: What did you think of the Big M?

Dylan: It's good. It kind of tastes like liquefied strawberry ice cream.

Tommy: Oh yeah, that's a really good analogy, which just really paints how fucked it is for you.

Josh: But it doesn't have the good qualities of a, um, of the ice cream, like it's not frozen.

Tommy: Um, 3D Dylan and I did something, um, you know, quite, quite heartwarming at the supermarket, didn't we, mate?

Dylan: Yeah, it was a good time, made me feel good. Yeah, in my heart.

Josh: Can I guess? Uh, yeah, you helped someone get something down from the shelf?

Tommy: Nah, definitely not.

Josh: What about the shelf?

Tommy: No, definitely not. No, definitely not. We, um, we went to buy a bunch of stuff for the office and we walked up to the self-checkout. Interestingly, uh, they're really promoting in Canada to use the checkout people, not the self-checkout. Really? It's a bit the other way. Why?

Dylan: I don't, I don't know. They're starting to move towards it. Like, most places are starting to get more self-checkouts.

Tommy: Yeah, but whenever I go grocery shopping, there's maybe 15 checkout lines with a person at it, or it's just because you need a human to talk to to say that you've got cheaper price somewhere else and they need to fucking match it.

Josh: Computer can't deal with the sort of shit you're throwing at it.

Tommy: Anyway, we walked up to this self-serve checkout that was vacant, and I saw like a receipt popping out, and I was like, could see that on the screen it still said, it was like, please take your change. And I looked down, it was two $5 notes hanging out of the machine. Oof, what do you do at that point? There's the devil.

Josh: Well, I think you just straight away say, excuse me, who's—

Tommy: I couldn't see the person that was using it. What would you do, Mr. 97?

Mason: Uh, I'd probably just hesitate and leave it. I wouldn't, I wouldn't even know what to do.

Tommy: You'd panic. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josh: And so what did you do?

Tommy: Oh, we took it. It's what bought the $10 of pot.

Josh: I was gonna say the housewarming, sorry, the heartwarming, not housewarming.

Tommy: No, we, we We went out of our way to get the lady over and she's like, oh yeah, I'll just take it whoever comes. And I was like, no, maybe cheque the receipt, cheque the last, you know, what was run through so you know. She like opened it up, you know, got in through her codes and printed out the receipt that was, you know, of the transaction, the time and stuff. So hopefully someone went back and actually claimed the 10 bucks.

Josh: So someone is going to say, hey, I bought 2 avocados and a sausage roll.

Tommy: Yeah, maybe.

Mason: I would.

Tommy: I'd be like, I bought this and at that place. And she'd be like, okay, I know that now. A mate of mine—

Josh: What happens, just quickly, what do you think happens from a Woolworths point of view? So this lady, she has to tell her manager?

Tommy: No, it's a pocket. Well, how many people would pocket this shit?

Josh: I definitely wouldn't. I just couldn't handle the—

Tommy: Nah, nah, I think she'd put it somewhere and then maybe someone along the line would pocket it.

Josh: Could we do a sting? Yeah, could we deliberately leave money, do the whole receipt thing and they'll come back 15 minutes later and say, hey, yeah, could we, or no?

Tommy: No, it's a bit complex and a bit annoying for the whole people, whole staff.

Josh: It's—

Tommy: I've been watching, it goes against the heart. Well, you, you want to catch out of stuff. I mean, any of those shows where you're looking to catch somebody, yeah, you, you're pretty much going to catch somebody.

Josh: Do you have To Catch a Predator in Canada?

Dylan: Yeah, yeah, we do.

Josh: Is it a Canadian version or is it US?

Dylan: I think there is a Canadian version of it.

Tommy: A mate of mine, he was, I think, a bit fried. Probably had a big night out. On Monday morning, he had to go to work, and he went to the ATM, took out some cash, $350 or something like that.

Mason: Why?

Tommy: Sounds like he was, he was still partying if he took out exactly $350.

Josh: Why do you need that much cash?

Tommy: I don't— yeah, that's a good, good point. He wasn't still partying, he was going to work. But he said to me, because I saw him that afternoon, and he's like This morning I took out $350 and I fucking left it in the ATM.

Josh: Oh, that's annoying. Remember I had that happening, um, Greece?

Tommy: Oh, that's right.

Josh: Or Turkey, sorry. But they— it's the machine shut down.

Tommy: Yeah, it's fucked. I mean, this is where if we're, if we're, we're all in the deficit in terms of Gronk speak, these are slowly getting you up. Like, everyone's born a Gronk, okay? Let's be honest, we're all Gronks. We're just trying to win back They're gronky points.

Josh: Babies are the biggest gronks. They shit their pants.

Tommy: They shit everywhere. Yeah, they didn't give a shit. And so we got a few gronk points. Yeah, we did back yesterday.

Dylan: We did.

Josh: Okay, and so, uh, Mr. 97, have you got anything else in your bag?

Mason: Yeah, a few more surprises.

Josh: Okay, uh, because I don't know which bag you have. Can you sort of— I'm nervous of what order you're going with, but I'm happy with whatever. I don't think Tommy even knows everything I got. Okay, we're sticking on savory.

Mason: Yeah. All right, well, I mean, something else could be put on top of these. That'd be an interesting combo, wouldn't it?

Josh: No, we're not doing crazy combos, man. This is Australiana, not freak show.

Tommy: He's pulled out the shapes, which are just, uh, uh, what do you think?

Josh: Like, when you see these, have you ever seen these before?

Dylan: No, but it looks like a cracker.

Josh: So that'd be so rude.

Tommy: A cracker? Yeah, crackers are a bit disappointing. This is, this is between a chip and a cracker.

Josh: This is an Arnott's shape. Uh, which I've actually, uh, at one point in my life, uh, wore a costume that was an Arnott's Shape.

Tommy: That's right, for the radio show.

Josh: Yeah, but it was actually— so, um, the radio—

Tommy: make you do— well, so was it Jules Lund?

Josh: So Jules Lund actually wore the Shape's outfit for a festival they put on called Shapestival. Yeah, which was completely sponsored by Arnott's Shapes.

Tommy: And, um, imagine the room where that idea came up.

Josh: Yeah, well, they dropped like over $2,500 on the costume, and so, uh, they were like, who's— who wants to take it? And I was like, fuck yeah. Yeah, like, I just saw— like, how could you leave it behind?

Tommy: You said fuck yeah, Bree said fuck no.

Josh: Yeah, well, that's the thing, we only had it for a few weeks in our house because it took up one— our spare bedroom, the whole room. But the, uh— but I did get to wear it when Ellen DeGeneres was trying to pick people to come to LA Why did I say LA like that? I think it's all the milk. Um, sounded normal to me. Okay, it's all in my head. Uh, I did wear the Arnott's shape and I made the news.

Mason: That's exciting.

Tommy: But you didn't get picked.

Josh: No, I didn't get picked and they thought I was a corn chip.

Tommy: I actually think you're a kind of guy that would rather get on the news than go to LA.

Josh: Yeah, win a trip. Yeah, absolutely. So these are Arnott's shapes. These are the Originals BBQ. You start opening that and trying that 97. We've got a lot of things because I— this is— this is the classic, uh, shop for, for me, you know, back in 2004. This is a Lynn Jansen shop. Okay, so we've got Vegemite.

Tommy: Uh, oh, that's a solid tub.

Josh: Yeah, Mr. 97 was like, mate, classic you picking the biggest fucking one.

Tommy: What do you reckon?

Josh: What do you reckon you'd pay for 560 grams?

Tommy: Uh, $8.80. $4.

Josh: Less than $8.

Mason: $6.

Josh: I don't know the exact amount. It's like $7 something. This isn't fucking Price Is Right. Uh, actually, it could be good to— should we get the receipt? Yeah, so we can play Guess Who?

Tommy: Um, where is the receipt?

Josh: Uh, it's, it's in the kitchen. Yeah, the kitchenette. Okay, so we have Vegemite, which, uh, the camera's now rocking. That's okay, that's fine. Uh, so we do have the Vegemite, which we'll be having soon. Yeah, and then Mr. 97 is getting the receipt. Can you just quickly tell us, TJ, about, uh, Um, last night I was very excited that your episode of Matt D'Avella's podcast came out. Tell me about it.

Tommy: Uh, were you annoyed that yours— mine came out before yours?

Josh: No, no, I was good. Well, because it made, it made more sense because you're talking about meditation.

Tommy: No, so Matt D'Avella, we were on his podcast in LA, uh, that was when it was video. He's since changed the format. We've, we've gone video, he's gone just audio. Um, So Josh and I have both done an interview, done a chat with him, so they're more conversational. And, um, you weren't by my side, Josh, so it was Matt and I. His latest video is about meditating for an hour every day. Yeah, for 30 days.

Josh: Sam Harris was a big fan of his video.

Tommy: Well, yeah, he— Sam was, um, too busy to be on it is what Matt told me. Really? What do you mean? Matt said that, um, he reached out to, I think, his assistant who said, oh, Sam's so busy, which I could imagine he is.

Josh: He's like, you're doing 4 hours of meditation a day, just fucking find a bit of time for your boy.

Tommy: Yeah, but then Sam retweeted it, so I was thinking, imagine, I'd love for Matt to have that conversation with Sam Harris because a lot of it's around his app and yeah, his principles and stuff. And we talked heavily about Sam's app, which I use too, and Matt does too. But wouldn't it be funny if Sam was annoyed that his assistant just kind of— because you could imagine when he's—

Dylan: when someone as big as Sam, all the requests, he'd just be saying no, no, no.

Josh: I guess part of it too is like it was still a great result for Sam Harris because it was Diavella talking up the app and all that sort of thing, the Waking Up app. But yeah, if you listen to podcasts like this one, type in The Ground Up Show on your podcast app of choice and you can listen to that.

Tommy: We got a message on Instagram. Did you see that? No. Who? Oh, fuck. I can't remember.

Mason: I saw this this morning.

Dylan: Yeah.

Tommy: Have you got your phone? Get your phone. I don't want to butcher his name because I've just gone blank on his name.

Mason: Early this morning.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Josh: Why did I not see it?

Tommy: Uh, who was it? Maybe it was to me personally. Um, but he was saying— Sean, Sean, Sean. So Sean messaged, maybe was directly to me.

Josh: Okay.

Mason: No, I think I saw it, it was on the Daily Talk Show anyway.

Josh: Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sean said, uh, yeah, Sean's from the UK. Yes, he listens to us on the tube sometimes. Sean, if you're on the tube right now, give us a woo-hoo. Uh, just listen to the Ground Up Podcast. Two things. Number 1, I also started listening because of the Ground Up podcast. 2, I think that's the first time I've listened to a podcast when Tommy doesn't say gronk. That felt weird. Have a good day Friday.

Tommy: Yeah, so I've rattled Sean by not saying gronk, but it's probably not the time or day to say gronk on Matt's show. Maybe next time. I'll definitely— if we get— I'll go back on and I'll say gronk for sure.

Josh: Sean is the, uh, one of our biggest supporters of Fat Fridays.

Tommy: From the chat with Matt though, I didn't know this about him, but he said for 5 years he never went on a date. Like he had this period of time where it was just like he got so in his head about dating. And I'm looking at Mr. 97 as I talk this. I've looked away from the boys. You should listen because you might get some insights, Mr. 97.

Josh: Great. Maybe that 5 years, that was just all bicep work. It does make sense.

Tommy: He's come back strong. What are we doing with the sausage roll?

Josh: It's upsetting me.

Tommy: Do you want to get this in your goblet?

Josh: I don't— let's just, just have a bite.

Tommy: No, Dale, how are the shapes?

Mason: What did you think?

Dylan: Yeah, they're good.

Tommy: He's finished the pack.

Josh: What the fuck? He hasn't used them.

Dylan: No, they kind of just taste like crackers. The flavour needs a bit more enhancing.

Mason: Did you see they were releasing the, uh, seasoning in a shaker?

Josh: Yeah, they're all doing that now, aren't they?

Tommy: It's all a gimmick and it makes it— it's too much.

Josh: I nearly bought a burger sauce for the office.

Tommy: Burger sauce.

Josh: What is that?

Tommy: Yeah, what is that? It must be mayo or tomato sauce. It's meant for burgers, right?

Josh: It's like Big Mac sauce.

Tommy: Yeah, anyway, get this in your gob. I'm gonna just put a bit on the tip here.

Josh: Wait, wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, before you put on the tip.

Tommy: Why?

Josh: Well, he's gonna eat it directly and then I'm—

Mason: Do we need knives?

Tommy: Just let him have a bite.

Mason: We don't have knives.

Josh: I'll take the other end.

Tommy: Okay, so he's actually— oh, he's just— yep, he's bitten into the sausage roll. Um, what do you think? Have you had one of these?

Dylan: Smaller.

Tommy: Smaller?

Josh: Oh, he's had some.

Tommy: He hasn't taken it yet.

Josh: Fuck. Where did you have it?

Dylan: Christmas dinner.

Josh: Oh, what do you mean Christmas Eve dinner?

Tommy: What are they? Not—

Josh: they're not Australian?

Dylan: Well, we have ones that are literally that wide.

Tommy: What are they? Sausage rolls?

Dylan: Yeah, sausage in a roll, but it's a little piece of a sausage.

Tommy: Okay, no, yeah, yeah, so you've got like a a legit sausage wrapped with pastry.

Josh: Yeah, there's no— that— this is not what that is.

Tommy: This is 7% cat.

Josh: Yeah, look at the inside.

Dylan: Yeah, I don't know. I mean, it doesn't taste bad.

Josh: It tastes amazing, doesn't it? So you finish that, add sauce as you go. That's how you're meant to have it.

Tommy: What else we got?

Josh: So I've got some—

Mason: got the rest. He's got the rest.

Josh: I've got a lot of exciting stuff.

Tommy: I'm looking forward to the confusion.

Josh: All right, you ready?

Mason: So you can have mine if you want.

Josh: Have you finished this Yeah, what a beast.

Mason: I keep burping up everywhere.

Josh: Yeah, everywhere. What does that mean?

Mason: It's not great.

Josh: Uh, here we go. Oh yeah, so these are an after-dinner item. This is my equivalent of an after-dinner mint. It's the Mint Slice.

Tommy: Where do you think that after-dinner mint thing came from? Is it legit, like, we want to clear your palate, or you want to make your breath smell good with chocolate?

Josh: I want a mint, but I also want a bit of chocolate.

Mason: A bit of chocolate.

Tommy: I want a little something, a little bit something sweet, something I had Thai restaurants, they give out mints and stuff, and this one I go to, mint, like a little afternoon mint. Fuck it, I brought back memories on the weekend.

Josh: They are delicious. So these mint slices, Arnott's, now not owned by Australian— like, Arnott's on an Australian company now, I believe. Yeah, you said it. I think they're maybe— I think that they might be— hey Siri, it's happened a lot. Let's see who owns Arnott's. Who owns Arnott's?

Mason: Campbell's Soup Company.

Tommy: Yeah, they're American food manufacturer. Yeah, so Campbell's Soup had a factory in Shepparton. Uh, where was it? Um, yeah, it's a tour— no, another little one. Anyway, they had a— just outside of Shep, there was the big Campbell's Soup can up on the thing.

Josh: Like, oh really?

Tommy: It's quite iconic.

Josh: But I don't know if— is that related?

Tommy: Yeah, I think Maybe part of that, the cannery, cans came from. Yeah, we'll go with that.

Josh: Jordan Michaelides says that we should have Vegemite done right.

Tommy: What's that?

Josh: Which, um, I don't know what done right means, but he's living vicariously through us and it doesn't involve a blender. That's how it's not done right.

Tommy: I can tell you Vegemite done right to me, for me, is on toast, not too crispy toast, but just good enough. Maybe a setting of 4, depending on what kind of butter or no butter. Yeah, that's how you do it.

Dylan: Absolutely.

Tommy: It has to. You go no butter, you outrageous.

Josh: How many calories am I saving?

Tommy: It doesn't matter, you're eating Vegemite on toast.

Josh: You've eaten fucking 6 pies and a bin of pie so far.

Tommy: A lot of people, Dil, put Vegemite on toast and then you get real hipster with it and put avocado and then egg. The thing is, it's just salt, right? It's like, yeah, well, can you read the ingredients for us?

Dylan: Yeah. Where are we? Ingredients is yeast extract from yeast grown on barley and wheat. Salt, mineral salt 508. I don't know what mineral salt 508 means.

Tommy: It's just the number for the malt extract from barley.

Dylan: Color, flavors, niacin, thiamine, riboflavin, and folate.

Tommy: Yeah, there's a bunch of shit that's not that great for you. It's actually got no use for anybody. People put this shit, Dil, on, um, also like on, uh, what do you call it, ulcers. Have you heard of that? Yeah, so it's like stings the shit out of them. I don't know what the purpose was. Have you ever done that?

Josh: No, absolutely not.

Tommy: Uh, stop that.

Josh: So there's different, there's different menu recipes that you can— if you go to vegemite.com.au/recipes, you can find out some fun ones. But, uh, we do— I think the best way that we'll consume this is will be the final thing, the last 20 seconds of the podcast, and we're just going to use a spoon.

Tommy: I've got to give a shout out to Hayden Wilson. No, no, Hayden Wilson, you know Hayden. Yeah, Hayden. This is, this is a guy that I kind of have come into contact with later in my life. I met him, well, I didn't even meet him, I interviewed him when I was in Shepparton because he grew up in Shepparton.

Josh: It sounds like the start of a highlights video, like Mr. 97 will be grabbing it.

Tommy: And at the point of meeting him, he went under the alias or the name of Hungry Haydo, and he was a competitive eater. He went on Australia's Got Talent and he said to me, I hold the Guinness World Record for eating a huge thing of Vegemite the quickest. But he said then it never got aired and the record never went through. Oh, so he, he just ate it the fastest. I don't even know if he's got footage of it.

Josh: So annoying.

Tommy: How fucking annoying.

Josh: Maybe we could film it, maybe Get it back in. Could we do it as a Fat Friday thing? Could Hungry Haydo, could Hungry Haydo come in and do a thing with Hulk Smash Food as well?

Tommy: Well, Hulk Smash Food is, is on another level. That's— he's just training. He's doing like— I never heard the term water bloody— well, it's not waterboarding, water training. Like, he takes it very seriously. It's not just athletics.

Josh: Swimmer. When he's saying water training, he doesn't mean in the pool.

Tommy: No, he means stretching his stomach out by drinking copious amounts of water, and he has to spew it out.

Josh: That's why I do it every Fat Friday. So this is the real Arnott's one. This is the, this is the thing that if you are overseas, you probably would have heard of. It's called a Tim Tam, uh, pre-day deal. Have you heard of Tim Tams?

Dylan: I've heard of it, but only through the show.

Tommy: Oh yeah, okay, good. You heard of Vegemite?

Dylan: I've heard of Vegemite.

Tommy: You heard of Arnott's, the company?

Dylan: Nope.

Josh: Okay, we don't have Arnott's. So the interesting thing with, uh, my choice of Tim Tam was I nearly got 2 packets.

Tommy: What, because you went— you've gone the double coat, which is— we didn't grow up with this, I don't think, did we?

Josh: I did. I think that the Jamisons, we had double coat, but I think it's indulgent. And so it's, it's an extra bit of chocolate. I don't think they even need to have the regular one anymore.

Tommy: Now this is, this is so much better because the chocolate's so good on it, the coating chocolate. So they've just doubled up the coating chocolate. Also, they say we should actually weigh— we should take a normal one, original, take a double coat, weigh the two. How much is the difference?

Josh: I was telling 3D Dill that we— I want to eventually do it where we weigh ourselves before Fat Fridays and then after Fat Fridays, but he pointed out that would have to really focus on the volume that we're eating. Yeah, which, like a chimichanga, I feel like I've doubled my weight.

Tommy: Eating like a king-sized pho would make— would be better.

Josh: You're a real pho pusher at the moment.

Tommy: Nah, I just— I'm just saying, like, I've seen Hulk smash foods.

Josh: Give us now.

Tommy: That smells good. It just smells like melting sugar.

Mason: Have you seen the health star rating on that one?

Josh: I don't think they bother putting it on. No, they do.

Mason: It's zero point. It's on the front.

Josh: Really?

Tommy: When you take cocaine, you don't talk about how bad it is for you. You enjoy it?

Josh: 5.5. Do you know what, that's sadder than University of Melbourne's 43 in the world on their, on their, um, 0.5. Actually, 3D Deal wants to go to Melbourne Uni to get a, um, piece of merchandise.

Tommy: For what?

Dylan: To wear, probably get a hat.

Tommy: Each to their own. I mean, I could think—

Josh: what do you want to do? Holmes Glen. Why any?

Tommy: Why any of them?

Josh: What's another one?

Tommy: I don't know, what's— what?

Josh: JMC Academy.

Tommy: No, we should get— no, no, this is what you should get. Piece of hard yakka clothing, like a full tradie. Yes, a tradie's outfit.

Josh: Little—

Tommy: you can get Melbourne University, whatever. No one's going to remember them in years. The universities— I'm losing my ears. I'm losing my ears.

Josh: Headphones?

Tommy: Yeah, losing my headphones. I'm high on sugar, let's go.

Josh: It's because this isn't tight. I think that's right. All right, so here you go, 3D deal. You're gonna have one first. Really, I suggest going and watching the video, guys.

Tommy: So are you okay? I've been so surprised about how Mason's just put another big M in front of me. I'll take it. I don't drink anymore, so I've got it fine.

Josh: But don't share milk, dairy's not a good thing.

Tommy: No, he hasn't sipped it. Oh, he's had a little sip.

Josh: Yeah, it'll be fine.

Tommy: Little bit of bacteria. I've been surprised at how many people actually enjoy the fat products.

Josh: Don't eat it yet. Don't eat it.

Dylan: Yeah.

Tommy: You know, then it's been one of the most favourite episodes for some people. So maybe there is something in just listening to us talk about this food.

Josh: Well, the thing is that on our analytics, we can see the top day of the week and it's always Friday.

Tommy: Is it because people are gearing up for the weekend and they're just like, oh, download an episode. It always has that.

Josh: That Friday has most, I think because we create more promos and stuff. We're all going to have it in our hand before we buy it.

Tommy: Oh yeah. So Dylan, there was a 3D Dylan ad when we were young where it would be like, a genie would like take it out and they'd reappear. So it was like this never-ending Tim Tam packet, which was always like, oh, you so wanted that. Mr. 97, I've never held a Tim Tam for this long. All right, 3, 2, 1. That's good.

Josh: Now if this was radio, we'd be fired. No, Tim Tam slam. Oh yeah, I mean, this whole thing is very radio.

Tommy: So, um, a Tim Tam slam 3D deal is because there's like— it's like wafery. It's not, not— it's not wafery, it's biscuity in the middle but coated with a thick layer around it. So if you bite both ends, you can then suck fluid through it. It sounds horrible when you say strawberry.

Josh: Can you try it?

Tommy: Yeah, I'm going to try it. So I'll show you. So if I get this Oh, here we go. Here we go. Yeah, it's gonna be hard. I'm gonna have to sort of— I'm gonna have to— I'm gonna have to muscle this in slightly.

Josh: Here we go.

Tommy: Oh, oh, it's gone everywhere.

Josh: It's squirted everywhere.

Tommy: Fuck. It sounded like I was doing a bong. No, but it's got something in there.

Josh: That sounds like you got something.

Tommy: Yeah, it's got some stuff in there, see? So it's got a bit of strawberry flavor.

Josh: Strawberry flavor. So there was that. They're good, aren't they? Would you like another one? Yeah, I kind of want one. Yeah, you should. They are one of those ones where it's— so I'll tell you a tip from little fat Josh in the burbs, what I would do.

Tommy: What would you do, man?

Josh: So you're getting to this point here. We've gone through— it's a tray.

Tommy: If you shut the Tim Tam up, you're right, I'll be fucking annoyed.

Josh: No, there's 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 that we've had.

Dylan: Yep. Oh, I know what you're gonna do.

Josh: So what you do is, um, just so Mum doesn't know what's going on, you just do a little flippy flip. So, and then you just take one and then you can share. Yeah, I've only had one.

Tommy: So how many are in a packet? So you've got 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9. Yeah, this is the thing, they put 9 in because you can't have that with your partner, then someone's always going to have more.

Josh: Oh yeah.

Tommy: So then you got to go back and buy another packet.

Josh: Who's sharing anyway?

Tommy: I've heard that, um, what do you call it, that, uh, theory. That theory. I don't know how true it is. It's just—

Josh: So how does that— is that your favourite thing we've had so far? Yeah, it's pretty good.

Tommy: Which is the favourite thing?

Dylan: I like the meat pie and the sausage roll just because it's more—

Tommy: Oh, he's finished the sausage roll too!

Josh: He's like the guys you went to school with. Who are skinny, but they're fucking animals, and they just like— yeah.

Tommy: But, um, can we please just make a montage of 3D Dill? Every bite of the sausage roll. Okay, um, 3D Dill, tell us about the message you got.

Josh: Which one?

Dylan: Which message?

Tommy: Oh, you got a few.

Josh: He gets heaps of messages.

Tommy: No, on Facebook. I mean, other than—

Josh: oh yeah, do I know about it?

Dylan: Uh, you might. I don't know.

Tommy: You got a nice message from someone So one of my professors—

Dylan: is this the one you're talking about? Yeah.

Mason: Yeah.

Dylan: So one of my professors used to live in Melbourne when she was going to school.

Josh: She went to RMIT.

Dylan: Yeah, she went to RMIT and she found the video that Mr. 97 made on YouTube, saw that I was in it, and then she sent me my own— my— the video that I'm in.

Tommy: Just in case you didn't say it.

Josh: Just in case I didn't know.

Tommy: No, it's awesome.

Dylan: And she said, you're officially down under. And I said, Yeah, I, I made it.

Josh: Yeah.

Dylan: Um, what else did she say?

Tommy: I'm having full, full dialogue. Is that, is that okay with your prof?

Dylan: Yeah, I think so. I don't know. Uh, she said, um, enjoy Australia. Fitzroy and Abbotsford are real hipster areas. You're on to a good start and at least have an experience in a creative vibe. The entire Melbourne community has an amazing food culture. And though a little expensive in some areas, try and enjoy as much as you can. Make the most of it. I've missed Melbourne culture heaps.

Tommy: P.S. Bring back some heroin. Yeah, no, that's so lovely. I can imagine she's just thinking about her time here and just going, yeah, we're living—

Josh: she gets it, travelling vicariously. I feel like I'm travelling vicariously through 3D Deal right now.

Tommy: Have you had any other messages about coming over here?

Josh: Oops, sorry, I did actually.

Dylan: I got a message from one of my really close friends that we're calling this segment.

Josh: 3D Dill reads out all these texts.

Dylan: So I've known this girl for 3, 3 years now and we're really good friends. And I sent her the YouTube video.

Josh: Yes.

Dylan: To the, to the thing that, that Mason made. Yeah. And she says, OMG, I just watched this. I'm so proud of you. I could cry, but I won't because I'm not a bitch.

Josh: Sounds very, very Tommy. Go on.

Dylan: That was pretty much it.

Josh: Yeah, that's, that's lovely.

Tommy: That's nice.

Josh: Uh, so that's pretty cute.

Mason: Mint slush, Josh.

Josh: Uh, we'll get to the next one.

Mason: Okay, we're doing—

Tommy: I reckon, how long are we going? Cleansing, huh?

Mason: How long are we finishing off before the Vegemite?

Tommy: Yeah, I think we head through like a storm, like a fucking train, and just smash through the last bit.

Mason: I can smash through what Josh is on the bag and then finish off with the Vegemite and Thanks guys.

Tommy: Yeah, I'm just— I'm basically saying pick up the pace.

Josh: Okay, so here's the thing. So this— can you believe it's been 37 minutes?

Tommy: I know, that's why I'm saying it.

Josh: Uh, so this is very exciting. Uh, not the best type of food. Yeah, but a nostalgic, uh, classic that, uh, we've spoken about on the show and we were never able to get because we had a local Coles, not a Woolworths. And so I've gotten Oval Teenies.

Tommy: Yeah, they're real old school.

Mason: They're the best.

Tommy: You know what they are?

Mason: Yeah, they're in our school canteen.

Tommy: Oh yeah, it was always the thing that was like, when I— I don't know what they're like now, but they were just like little— they look like Mentos. Yeah, tablets, but they were like crunchy, uh, like, what was it? Picture like a, um, Milo or something that you put into a drink that's like powdered. It'd be like if you crumb, you know, put that together and made it really, really tight, and then you put into tablets. So it was like always sold as like a healthy alternative.

Josh: That's why I'm not that interested in having one.

Tommy: Oh, because they're healthy? Yeah, well, just because after having— No, they're like per serving is 12 grammes of carbs, so they're not—

Josh: It's fine. Uh, Chocmalt treats.

Tommy: I mean, they're healthy compared to everything else.

Josh: I might even skip this weird little thing. I'm gonna think I'm gonna see— I can't just have one of yours?

Mason: Yeah, go for it.

Josh: Thanks.

Tommy: They're weird as fuck. I mean, they did well. They had cut through.

Josh: Orange packaging. No, no, I don't like them.

Tommy: This thing is—

Dylan: it looks like a pill.

Josh: Yeah, that you would take. Oops, what happened? I'm eating too much.

Tommy: Sounds like you slipped. All right, what else you got? So here we go, here we go.

Josh: This is my favourite thing. Oh, out of the whole thing. All right, to give you context, I had one of these most days. I would get the double version of this at Endeavour Hills Coles. Ladies and gentlemen, we have the Caramello Koala, and these are also famous for being, uh, you know how in, um, you guys have like, uh, cookies as fundraisers? Yeah, like you sell cookies. Yeah. We sell Freddo Frogs and Caramello Koalas.

Tommy: Oh yeah, it's like the counters of doctors' surgeries and, you know, dental clinics.

Josh: And so my family was—

Tommy: dental clinics, yeah, they do, man.

Josh: So my mum works at one. Yeah, it's true. But I actually, uh, you've got two types of families, and our family was the one that would buy the whole— just put in the cash at the end and you would just have one a day, which defeats the whole purpose of it.

Tommy: Do you remember it was like a— it must have been an initiative throughout primary schools, and it was Like you're saying, it was a box, it was quite big and it had like a handle.

Josh: Yeah, the fundraiser box, that's what we're talking about.

Tommy: So, but I never got the Caramello Koalas. I was thinking about the ones—

Josh: Maltesers with the—

Tommy: Yeah, peanut M&Ms, Maltesers. And my brother had it under his bed and fuck did I go hard on it.

Josh: So there was definitely, yeah, so that's a more old school what you're describing, but they're huge industries, huge— Siren. Huge businesses. So like I think Dairy Milk and stuff, or like Cadbury, do a bunch to try and get your the school's, uh, money. So Caramello Koala, can you just hold it up? Dill, is that the cutest thing you've ever seen?

Dylan: It's the, the koala. The koala on the packaging looks a lot cuter than the koala on the actual chocolate.

Josh: Can I get a photo of you with it and we'll send it, we'll send it to your sister. She's obsessed with animals. Yeah, there we go, beautiful. All right, so this is going to blow your mind. You're not going to know what's going to happen. Bite into it and we want to get a very clean, as in you got— we all shut the fuck up, response to 3D Dill having the Caramello Koala, because I don't think it's what he's going to expect.

Dylan: Do you want like some ASMR stuff?

Josh: Exactly.

Mason: You want a big bite in, like right into the middle of that?

Josh: Oh my God, too much.

Tommy: That was good.

Josh: Describe it.

Dylan: Very Soft and sticky, but chocolatey.

Josh: Go on.

Dylan: Caramelly.

Josh: Yeah, I love, uh, very rich. Yes, it is my favourite out of them.

Tommy: I was thinking we should, um, as a tactic, growth strategy, send all of these, um, episodes, Fat Fridays, to like some fetish group. ASMR does have that vibe.

Josh: I'm going to enjoy mine now. What do you think, Mr. 97? When was the last time you had a caramelly koala?

Mason: 5 years maybe. This is the most amount of sugar I've eaten in 2 years.

Tommy: It's David Goggins over here, easily. And then we got our final one, which— is it the final? I see it under the table. It's out of the packet. Oh, it's resting.

Josh: I forgot about the Lamington.

Tommy: 3-day deal. Do you want to do the honors?

Josh: Can you just get the Lamington, please?

Tommy: He's down. All right. Now this is— this— you've just gone a king size.

Josh: The only one. Oh my God, the only one they had. They didn't have like— because I normally— this is very untraditional, would you say that? Well, this is probably like 1950s style, and then we went through an individualistic era where you get your own little fucking lamington. You're not sharing?

Tommy: I want my own lamington.

Josh: Yeah, and so this is a fuck-off big one, and the great thing is, guys, do we need a knife or We don't have any knives and they don't sell knives around here, so I've bought 4 spoons.

Tommy: We should have told him this is what everyone eats by themselves.

Josh: Who's this? He would eat the whole thing. That sausage roll was meant for 4 people. Now here we go. So I'm going to, um, I'm phlegmy for some reason. It's like I ate a caramel koala.

Mason: There you go.

Tommy: Thank you.

Josh: So reduced, uh, it was $5, now $4.15.

Tommy: It's not that much of a saving.

Josh: It isn't, is it?

Tommy: No, 95 cents.

Josh: What, 1.5-star rating?

Tommy: Used by the 12th of, uh, this month.

Josh: Tomorrow.

Mason: Shit.

Josh: Bree's, uh, 2 days, 2 days. Wait, when's Bree's birthday? 12th of May.

Tommy: Yeah, so Sunday.

Josh: I thought her birthday was Saturday.

Dylan: No, it's May 12th.

Tommy: And now it's on camera.

Josh: Ah, no, this is good.

Tommy: That's good.

Josh: I was going to give her her gift on Saturday.

Tommy: It's on Mother's Day.

Josh: Yeah, maybe.

Tommy: Okay, so here we go, Dale. Hold it up, get a spoon into it.

Josh: Be very careful of the coconut and the RODECaster, please.

Tommy: Yeah, you got a spoon?

Josh: Yeah, he's got a spoon.

Tommy: Yeah, Dale's got a spoon.

Dylan: You're just taking a— taking a—

Tommy: Josh, do you want to hold it with your two hands so we can— so it's a bit higher bench so we can get it on? Can I smell it first? Yeah, you get your schnoz into it. Let's go sideways so we can show the— show it getting— yeah, all right, here we go. He's getting into it. It's not general practise that you would use a spoon for the inside.

Josh: Look at the inside. This reminds me—

Tommy: go hard, Dale— it's in Israel.

Josh: Jam roll.

Tommy: Oh, it's got a bit— nah, this is extra naughty. It's got a bit of cream in there or something.

Josh: Jam and cream. That's how you're meant to have lamingtons.

Dylan: Really?

Josh: Yeah, my mate, uh, Naysan, uh, will only eat lamingtons if they have jam and cream, which we know how that went for him.

Tommy: But I don't think that says that jam and cream is actually what's in lamingtons. No, definitely says that he loves cream.

Josh: Hey Siri, hey Siri, what's the ingredients that are made of Lamingtons? Okay, okay, it's too confusing. I'm gonna have a— what'd you think? It's pretty good.

Dylan: Yeah, yeah, I think it needs a bit more cream in it.

Josh: Okay, all right.

Tommy: Yeah, see, now this is the thing, Dill, it doesn't have cream.

Josh: Lamingtons have cream.

Dylan: Where?

Josh: I think you— from the boat, bloody definitely they're meant to have jam. No, no, or at least jam.

Tommy: Yes, jam, 100%. Cream, not so much. There's no— like, there's nothing here that says cream. There's no ingredients on this, uh, icing. No, no, no, no, no, they don't have cream. So we're having like something that's a bit more naughty.

Josh: Can you type in Lamington cream?

Mason: Lemming. They remind me of those, um, chocolate, chocolate rolls. Like, it's got— yeah, yeah.

Tommy: So there's like some of them put fucking cream into, but that's not a traditional lamington. There's— so there's a traditional lamington, jam and cream filled. Fuck, I was missing out as a kid. Mum, what were you doing?

Josh: No dairy, Tommy, no dairy.

Tommy: I remember the lamington cakes and shit that were filled with dirty cream, but like just the single serve ones were just Jam in my day.

Josh: All right, I'm gonna pass it down.

Tommy: Back in my day.

Josh: And then we're going to, um, finish off with a spoonful of Vegemite. And then we are going, uh, to have a mint slice, which you might not want to do after it because of what the salty and the mint won't go.

Dylan: I'll try it.

Josh: Anything else to report before we go that's Non-Fat Fridays related?

Tommy: Nah, I reckon that's it, boys. Good week, good hustle. Um, Onwards and upwards. Get down, get up again. Get a haircut, get a real job.

Josh: Do you open that? Don't put the Lamington spoon in it. This one hasn't been used yet.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah, no, that's all good. Yeah, okay, here we go. Deal's opening. Can you take it off the table? It's just getting a bit of vibration.

Josh: And I am— oh, give it a sniff.

Tommy: Hang on, we're gonna tell them what's an acceptable spoonful here. Or— no, no, no, no. Oh, I will say, I, um, there was a backpacker working at my friend's cafe and someone came in and said, can I have a piece of Vegemite to go. I just wanted to run to the tram stop, and the guy got the piece of Vegemite toast and said, what the fuck is that? The thickest layer of Vegemite on a piece of toast he'd ever seen. It was only because he was a foreigner, had no clue what was happening.

Dylan: No idea.

Tommy: And so that's about a traditional serving.

Josh: Okay, all right, so go for it, mate. Go for it. Oh, describe that.

Tommy: Oh, you poor bastard.

Josh: It's so salty. Go on, what else do you taste? I just taste salt. You can spit it out.

Tommy: No, no, no, he can't spit it out.

Josh: No, just—

Tommy: That's in my teeth.

Josh: Daily Talk to everyone.

Tommy: This is our first stitch-up.

Josh: Yeah, it was definitely not traditional.

Tommy: You would put not even half of that on a piece of toast.

Dylan: That was rough.

Josh: Is it like your nose? Does your nose feel funny?

Dylan: No, it's my mouth.

Josh: Okay, that makes sense.

Tommy: Welcome to Australia.

Josh: Wait till you sniff it. Uh, it's a daily talk show. Hi@thedailytalkshow.com. Wayne, thank you for your suggestion of the Big M. Uh, that was great. I'm trying to think, do we get any other email update on the, um, the hats? Uh, if you're one of the 5 people who won a hat through our Swoot competition, those hats will be being shipped on the 25th of May.

Tommy: Great.

Mason: Squeegees.

Tommy: I love it.

Josh: Squeegees, same day.

Tommy: Yeah, we'll be shipping those out. I find out about your merchandise when it's been ordered and when it's been spoken about on this show.

Josh: When I forward you the receipt for reconciling.

Tommy: If you haven't, can you give us a review?

Josh: Fuck, we nearly forgot the mint slice.

Tommy: Yeah, I know, this is something we can do off camera.

Josh: No, what the—

Tommy: I know, still can. I mean, I've eaten so many of those in my life. It's not even funny.

Dylan: I just need something to get this taste out of my mouth.

Tommy: Yeah, quickly.

Josh: Oh, fuck.

Tommy: Poor bastard. Sorry, mate.

Josh: I don't know if a mint slice is the way to go. It's probably like having toothpaste in orange juice.

Tommy: He's gone full ball, straight in. These are like my kryptonite.

Josh: Oh yeah. They're just chocolate with mint inside.

Tommy: Yeah, they're great.

Josh: Today on the talk show, we'll see you Monday.

Tommy: See you guys.

Josh: Bye. Mmm, yum.