Message in a bottle

Tommy: Wait a minute! Crossface!

Josh: The Daily Talk Show, a conversation sometimes worth recording with Josh Janson and Tommy Jackett. It's The Daily Talk Show, episode 122. Tommy Jackett, where are you, mate?

Tommy: Same place as I was yesterday, Collingwood.

Josh: Great.

Tommy: Another day, another dollar.

Josh: Is it freezing cold in Collingwood?

Tommy: Mate, it's absolutely freezing cold. And here's the thing, I've got like the heaters, I'm just concerned about the cost. I never thought I was going to be one of these people, whereas my old man used to be, you know, brutal about having a heater on. And I couldn't quite work it out whether it was just he didn't like the— and I still don't know whether he was being a tight-ass with the money Or he just didn't like the temperature. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he turns power points off at the plug, so— And then he once arced up when I said, "This is just annoying. It's like the inconvenience of having to turn it back on." "Yeah, but you save," you know, it was like 5 bucks a quarter or something.

Josh: Really?

Unknown: It was like, rather than—

Josh: What was the thing? Yeah, I got severely sunburnt one year. Like really, I didn't think I got sunburnt and it just turns out that I didn't go in the sun. And Bri and I were living in Port Melbourne, and I spent 4 hours in the sun. And so it was an amount of time where I wasn't realising how burnt I got— was getting. And I got home and I was red all over, and it was really bad. And Bri said to me, she's like, oh, we can't have the— I wanted to sleep with the aircon on. And Bri's like, nah, it's going to cost too much money. I said to her, I was like, It's either we have the aircon on or you take me to the hospital because it was so bad.

Tommy: A bit overdramatized. So, I've been thinking about the cost of what the heater that we got in my office space is costing. So, I did like a calculation. They reckon it's gonna be an added $100 a month to the bill.

Josh: I mean, that's not too bad, is it?

Tommy: Yeah, I mean, it's not bad.

Josh: I'd rather that than a freezer. Per month, per month.

Tommy: So if you were to have it on for, for 6 to 7 hours a day. So I get it. I like— I'm— you become your parent, you understand the realities that they were facing of life actually costs money. And yeah, comfort— like, fuck, our home electricity bill was $500 for the quarter or something. It seems ridiculous.

Josh: Yeah, I remember we, um had a lot of conversations around the power. And just, I would always be leaving, uh, lights on and stuff like that. And same with my dad, would be flicking them off and going berserk about it. But yeah, no, I feel like I've gotten a lot, a lot better about it too. But so it's freezing cold basically where you are, is what you said?

Tommy: It's freezing cold. And I caught up with my brother today, he's still in the office, uh, Mikey. Have you Have you met Mikey?

Josh: Uh, yeah, we met at your, um, at Bodhi's birthday.

Tommy: Ah, that's right. Yeah, he met the photographer, which was you.

Josh: I did take some photos and did a little video.

Tommy: Yeah, it's great. You hide, hide help. No, um, I was having coffee with him today and I saw like on his keyrings was this— it looked like almost like a mini Maglite in You know what they look like? Or like a—

Josh: Is that like a— I think I know what you mean. Are you gonna introduce us? Yeah, sure.

Tommy: And then I was like, what's this? And I started unscrewing it. And then I thought it was gonna be the thing that you put earbuds into. Have you seen those? People like who go to concerts a lot, there's like little capsule things that you can put to your key rings that have earbuds in them. It's usually for people who have tinnitus, Amy actually has one that you can, yeah, so you just chuck them in so you don't have injured ears. But it wasn't that. I unscrewed it and he tapped out these little tablets, and it wasn't ecstasy, it was lactose tablets because he's lactose intolerant. So if he wants to smash a full cream latte or a cheese platter, he can just down a couple of these.

Josh: Do you remember that I had a potential client reach out to me about this specific product? And the thing was, the confusing thing about it was that they couldn't— actually, it wasn't for dairy, it was for gluten. But the problem was that—

Tommy: That was the client I handballed you.

Josh: Yeah, but the thing was that they basically couldn't say anything. They were sort of between a rock and a hard place because They wanted to target people who couldn't eat gluten, but they couldn't say that they were for celiac. There were basically all these restrictions around it, so it's a bit bullshit. So, does it actually work? Is he drinking a litre of milk and not shitting himself?

Tommy: No, he just said for the occasion that I need to eat something. It seems bizarre. The anti-shit-yourself tablets.

Unknown: Yeah.

Josh: Is he— It's the anti-laxative. Is he, um, is so he can't eat dairy? Is he dairy intolerant or something?

Tommy: Well, he's a soy boy like you.

Josh: Soy boy. Yeah, fuck. Bri actually went on, Bri and I had Aperol Spritz yesterday and they were massive, uh, massive cups. And before you knew it, we were, um, really tipsy. I fell asleep on the street. I was tired as well, but, um. Bree was— had this whole thing talking about how I am a bit of a soy boy, but she likes that I'm sometimes a bit sort of blokey and then I'm also a soy boy.

Tommy: I love it. So, this is the week of my— I'm just milking it— the week of my wedding anniversary, but 2 years ago. And it's a sore spot for you, isn't it? Not getting the invite to my wedding.

Josh: It's very hurtful, but that's okay. I get it, I get it. It's our relationship. Best man.

Tommy: Yeah. And yeah, then just don't invite the guy that came and said— Exactly.

Josh: I remember that conversation. It was like, JJ, if— would you still come to the wedding if you couldn't be the best man? I'm like, bro, I only do the top. I only do the best bits. I'm either the groom or the best man. Won't even MC. Not interested.

Tommy: And you were booked out to be the videographer. But there's a story. Mikey, can you come around here? So this story, it's— he told it, it was like Mikey had thought that it was my 21st, not my bloody wedding, that he was telling this story. Come here.

Josh: This is a common thing that people do is they take it, take the speech too far.

Tommy: All right, I'm going to— this is— I'm outsourcing the, the podcast from my end to my brother now. So I'm going to put him on.

Josh: Here he is.

Tommy: Here you go, put that on.

Josh: Okay, he's putting on the head— he's putting on the headphones on right now. And Mikey, you just speak— howdy— you just speak in directly into the microphone. You should be okay. Uh, you got your puffer jacket on. Is Tommy turned off the heater to save costs, or is it still too cold?

Unknown: He said he wasn't allowed to have it on. Too expensive.

Josh: So you've— so, um, it was like a 21st birthday Tommy saying. What happened?

Unknown: So, well, no, it was the wedding speech.

Tommy: Yeah, the wedding speech about the, um, the incident with the hose.

Unknown: So, so this is one of those storeys that, um, as a, as a kid growing up was one that I just used just to, you know, trash talk Tommy. Just gave me a bit of the upper hand, you know, as a brother. You need to just keep your younger brothers in their place. Yeah, but as it turns out, when you grow up into an adult, you start to appreciate those storeys and you actually want to hear them even if they're about yourself. So Tommy, Tommy loves this story, but essentially I have this vivid memory of, um, just watching telly in the lounge room as you do, just whatever cartoon at the time. And Tommy, Tommy was in quite a bit of pain and I could hear that And so I, I had to go and explore what, what was the cause of this pain. And I just have this image of him out on the back deck with— naked. Um, and so you've got to imagine, like, he's 5, he's maybe 7 at the time, I reckon.

Josh: Yeah.

Unknown: So I would have been 11 or 12, he was 7 or 8. And so he's out on the back deck, dad's like Dad's a pretty serious character by nature, so he was in solution mode. And Tommy, Tommy had an erection that he couldn't get down. And he just, he was in such a state of panic that Dad just had to fix it. And so he's like, just hold, hold, hold still. And he had this cold, like it was either from the hose or a cold pot of water. And he was pouring the water on his cock. Dog on his erection just trying to help him get it down. And Tommy was literally in tears. Um, so it's a— yeah, it's an interesting image. It's very—

Josh: how did it go over? How did it go over at the wedding?

Unknown: I think it got a few laughs. I think, I think Gabe painted a good picture of, you know, Tommy and his life struggles.

Josh: Yeah, I feel like that's, um, it's it's probably gonna trigger him for the rest of his life now. And so, how old was he, did you say?

Unknown: Look, I think he was 7. I reckon he was around 7. He was small, he was a little, he was maybe young. Look, it was a 6 or 7. Let's call it between 5 and 10.

Josh: So he wasn't 17, he wasn't 17.

Unknown: No, he wasn't 17. He knew what to do with it by then.

Josh: So funny. Outrageous. Well, how was the wedding anyway? Because I wasn't invited. Was it—

Unknown: was it good? Yeah, the wedding was good.

Josh: Yeah, I wore a GoPro on my head for the speech.

Unknown: Actually, do you have that footage? I do.

Josh: I've never watched any footage that I could see, just so I get a bit of a glimpse. That'd be— it'd be great. Awesome. Thanks, Mikey.

Unknown: No worries, mate. See you, Josh.

Josh: Catch ya.

Tommy: G'day, mate.

Josh: That's nearly as good as my squeegee story.

Tommy: You know what, I, I think about whether I can remember or not, and I do remember the times that I— it must have been a thing. I would wake up with one, as you do if you're a man. Um, I've even noticed Bodhi, he's been waking up with little, little boners. It's the most bizarre thing on earth.

Josh: I didn't realise that you had— I can't remember getting a boner until I was like 12 or something.

Tommy: What did you just say, Michael? When, when do they go from being a boner to an erection?

Josh: That's true. Yeah, when you become—

Tommy: yeah, when you become an adult. But no, I do remember it happening.

Josh: Oh God, I'm glad we were able to, um, second day in a row bring Enough smut to the show, especially the first 10 minutes.

Tommy: Well, let me just tell you, smut connects. Gemma Watts, shout out to you, emailed through on hi@thedailytalkshow.com. And did you see that?

Josh: I know I haven't seen the emails, mate.

Tommy: Oh, it's hilarious.

Josh: In Italy.

Tommy: Oh yeah, true. So yesterday we're just talking about that, the big D and B, the drawing in the sand or whatever it is that I found on Google Satellite. And she said, nothing quite compares to the dick drawn with weed killer at my high school in 2008. And then she put— showed us a photo, sent us a link to a news.com article. The kids had gone out onto the oval. It's hilarious. It's huge. And so—

Josh: And I remember we were going to do stuff like that at our school. But the time before, the year before the— I think it was either the year before or the year before that, they People put oil on the roundabout, so cars were sliding, sliding off the roundabout. So, since then they were like really strict about anything happening. This is amazing on news.com.au. I'm just looking at the photo.

Tommy: My old man used to tell me a story. I used to tell my dad and I used to say to my dad, "Can you tell me some storeys from the olden days?" Anyway, he used to tell me the storey from when he was in high school and it was like their equivalent of muck-up day.

Josh: Would he let you put the heater on when he told the stories? Is that why he's like, "Turn the heater on, mate.

Tommy: Sit down." No, I will say the Jacket household, we had central heating and it wasn't allowed to go over a certain level, but it was always warm. So we had a nice—

Josh: Oh, that's nice.

Tommy: But here's the downside. We didn't get, air conditioning until I was about 17.

Josh: Oh, well, you know, just before, before we go into the, the, your dad's story, the thing with, um, the aircon, this is one of the biggest annoyances as a kid, which looking back is an extremely privileged situation, but we had air conditioning, but it was the, the shit aircon that requires you to open the doors, all the windows Evaporative, is it called? Yeah, it's the dumbest aircon. It's like, it's hot out, let's open up all the doors and try and make it cool. I remember like I was just lusting for a refrigerated aircon where we could close the doors.

Tommy: It's evaporative, it's using the moisture in the air.

Unknown: Is that what it does?

Tommy: So, they're the ones you put water into them and you can put cold water into them and makes it go a bit colder.

Josh: Never put cold, never put water in it.

Tommy: But the, yeah, the problem is if it's stinking dry heat, they're useless.

Josh: Yeah. And the, the other thing too, but the big pain point in our house, household when we were in Lysterfield South was, um, the pool heater. You would, um, you know, if mum and dad were away or whatever, you'd put it on like 33 degrees or whatever. It was sort of ear infection inducing stuff, but they would They would crack it.

Tommy: Yeah, well, yeah, so me old man, he said at his high school the kids lifted the— one of the principals had a Mini Moke. So like a Mini, like a Mini— no, it wouldn't be— we spoke about the Mini Mokes on this show once. It's like a fun boy. It basically looks like a golf cart with the top off. Anyway, it's like tiny little four-wheel drive with no top. This, this was a Mini. And so they lifted this Mini over into a netball court that had like a small sort of knee-high fence around it that was just sealing it off. And so they lifted it over this barrier so that the guy couldn't get the car out. It's genius.

Josh: How upset would you be though?

Tommy: You'd be cut. The rumour was at my high school that I went to, Wesley College, that there's a— there's this old grand staircase up to one of the top floors. And supposedly the rumour was— I think I even did this as a phoner on, um, Shepparton Radio to get— yeah, get people to tell us their muck-up day stories. The rumour was that people brought a cow to school and They took it up the stairs and you can't, you can't actually have a cow. A cow won't walk downstairs. They can go up, they can't come down.

Josh: That's a really good troll.

Tommy: Yeah, it'd be amazing. I mean, a bit of animal cruelty, but, um, it's a great joke.

Josh: As long as they're not, as long as they didn't have to put the cow down. Could you imagine? Just like, we're gonna have to get the police out and get the shotgun. That would be horrendous. Hey, I want to bring a segment. I don't think we've really got any official segments, do we?

Tommy: Well, we've got no structure if we're talking about dicks 2 days in a row.

Josh: Yeah, it's true. But the— maybe that could be— it's Tommy's smutty segment. Maybe we could turn that into—

Tommy: Yeah, I'm actually a big fan of that.

Josh: So, but no, I want to start a segment. Are you ready for it? Yeah, I'll just— so I've still got my I don't know if it's— I don't know if this is hay fever. I might just be sick, but I think I'm going to be better by tomorrow. I'm just going to give a big cough and then I'm going to announce the segment. Here we go. Ready?

Tommy: It has to start with a cough every single time.

Josh: I can do that. It's called Life Traps with Josh. Okay. So, Life Traps with Josh. I was going to do a music intro, but then I thought it would slow down my editing time. Because I'd have to insert it every time.

Unknown: Yeah, true.

Tommy: But just quickly, creative idea on how you could have actually had a music bed created was finding a busker, 'cause they're everywhere in Italy, just playing some beautiful music, just record it on your iPhone. There's our royalty-free music.

Josh: I'd be worried about being hustled. Yeah, true. So, life traps. So, we all hear about life hacks. It's, you know, how to hack things in life to get the most out of it. What the thing that I've been observing a lot lately and what we need to worry about is life traps, where it's these things that are set up in life to trap us, and I'm here to expose them.

Tommy: Good.

Josh: How does this sound?

Tommy: Well, I'm always about an exposé.

Josh: Okay. So, I've got a bunch of them, but I'm only going to do one, maybe one a day, maybe that's too much, maybe do it one a week. I've got a few. But one per segment. Yeah, no, I'm gonna do one a segment, but I'm wondering whether I do it this segment every single day. But I feel like that requires a discussion with you and I because that could be— that could turn into a whole show. Um, but first life trap was experienced, um, 2 days ago when ordering a focaccia. Is that how you say it? I don't know.

Tommy: Oh mate, we've gone over that in length. Focaccia or focaccia?

Josh: I should know, given it's, I'm in Italy, but I'm such an idiot. It took me like 2 days to realise that that's what it was. I just thought it was sort of pizza slicey type things that were in squares. And then Prue's like, "Do you want another focaccia?" I'm like, "I haven't had one yet." She's like, "You ate one before." Ah. But anyway, we were ordering a focaccia and it was €120. Very cheap, don't you think?

Tommy: $1.20, brilliant.

Josh: Yeah, well, you're as bad as Bri. €120 isn't $1.20, it's like $2.

Tommy: Here's the thing, though. If you're in Europe and you're converting the money and you're away for 3 months, you've got a difficult trip ahead of you. You just got to treat it like you're paying $4 for a coffee in Australia or €4 in Europe for a coffee.

Josh: No, no, no, no, no, no, you definitely do not do it. That is the worst advice I've ever heard. I think anyone listening would agree.

Tommy: I think it's transferable though, because when you do travel, things are very similar in there.

Unknown: In—

Tommy: I know you double it, but coffees everywhere in Europe are usually costing between $2.80 and $4.80, which is around about the same price but in a different currency, if that makes sense.

Josh: No, it doesn't make sense because if you had— if something was €2.50, it would be nearly a $5 coffee.

Tommy: No, I know, I know, but I'm saying it's a similar price for— as in what— when you're in the country. I know it's fine to translate it. The problem is don't be trying to convert every purchase. It's a nightmare.

Josh: I think that's a massive trap that you're falling into. You need to— you can't If anyone is— if anyone has heard the advice that euros and dollars are the same thing and treat it the same way— It's not what I'm saying.

Tommy: It's not what I'm saying.

Josh: Okay, it sounds like it a lot. Go on, you can keep explaining yourself if you want to.

Tommy: You wouldn't eat an ice cream if you were converting it every time, so you end up paying like 8 euros.

Josh: You're making it sound like I'm having to do some sort of fucking equation that involves pi. Sometimes I'm eating pie, don't get me wrong, but we're literally talking about just doubling it as a conservative number is a good way of doing it. So if I've got a cappuccino and I spend 5 bucks, or 5 euros, sorry, that 5 euros is actually looking like 8 Australian dollars.

Tommy: Yeah, I know, I know.

Josh: And, and so that's the psychology of it too, is some things will look cheaper where it's like, oh man, pizza's only 10 euros, you know, that, that is still $19, which isn't, isn't crazy. I think it's a good I would strongly, strongly, strongly disagree with your argument just to treat them as one for one.

Tommy: Well, no, treating them one for one, because otherwise what the fuck are you eating or drinking? You're not going to find similar prices in Europe as you do in Australia. Like, we think $4 for coffee—

Josh: You're doing it for tourist traps, which is also, you know, part of the whole life traps is that the— you can see gelati, like, you need to be able to ascertain, is this— are they trying to rip us off here? So you need to have some sort of sense of like, what did we pay for coffee last time, so we can make sure that we're not paying an exorbitant— because we saw like examples where it was like €4 for a coffee, but then we had coffee at another place and it was for like €1. So then we knew, so that's like, this is a tourist, this is a tourist touristy bit.

Tommy: But, okay, so you're on the lookout, you're on the lookout for a life trap.

Josh: Yeah, so, and the— so I ordered the focaccia. I said the first bit in Italian. I was really proud. I think I said, I said, uno San Daniela, I think was the name of the focaccia that I wanted. Uno San Daniela pófavore. And she brought— she then had like a slicer and she was sort of showed me where she was slicing it. I was like, yeah, like, yeah, that looks like— I just sort of nodded. Anyway, it was— she then gave me the price and it was €5.40. And my thought was that it was €1.20. And this has gotten me before and it's got nothing to do with the them and everything to do with me. But on the sign, which I just completely ignored and didn't really connect the two together, next to the €120 sign it said, um, what did they say, uh, 100 grams. It's the old weight. But I don't think they were trying to scam me at all, but it reminds me of 2012, South Melbourne Coles, I bought a watermelon because it said 80 cents. Ended up costing me $11 because I thought, fuck, watermelon. I'd never bought a watermelon in my life, and I was like, I didn't realise watermelons were this cheap. So I carried this whole— and I got to the checkout and they said $11, and I was so embarrassed about that, I just ended up taking it to work. Yeah, a whole fucking watermelon.

Tommy: So funny. I've done that same thing with watermelon. That's the trap, the watermelon trap. That's definitely—

Josh: if you ever see a bloke carrying a watermelon in Coles, you know that they've fucked up. They've got no idea. They're about to learn a valuable lesson. Um, do you know what? You know what? Do you know what I'm gonna do as a bonus? Because this is this celebratory first inaugural life trap, I'll do a bonus one.

Tommy: I mean, I don't know if that's how you keep the longevity in it.

Josh: Well, here we go. Another life trap. I don't know how to avoid this necessarily, but you order water. Yeah. You go to a supermarket or whatever, you order water.

Tommy: You buy water or ordering? Are you ordering a cup of water or buying a bottle?

Josh: You're buying a bottle of water because you don't want to drink the water around here. So, you're buying bottles everywhere you go and they're quite inexpensive compared to, say, your Mount Franklin and stuff in Melbourne. Anyway, a side note on the water bottle. They're so— Some of the plastic is so thin that I had a situation 2 days ago where I was opening the bottle of water and I was just holding the bottle a little bit too tight. And I lost half the bottle on me. And then I kept pressing it. I kept like accidentally, like your instinct in that moment is to hold it firmer. And I was just— people thought I was fucking crazy because I was in the middle of the street tipping water on me and bringing it back. Stop it. Stop it. I'm like, I can't.

Tommy: Have one Negroni and you're having a wet t-shirt competition with yourself.

Josh: What is a Negroni? Is that another— is that like an Aperol?

Tommy: Oh yeah, yeah, sorry, sorry. That's what I mean, Aperol. But there is Negronis. Like, yeah, actually, you have one Negroni, you'd be on the floor. Negroni is like a, a pretty hard cocktail. It's just got quite a few substances in it.

Josh: So, uh, no thanks. But that wasn't the, um, the life trap. The life trap is, uh, ordering water, especially when it's not in English or not in your native language. You take a sip and you get the biggest shock of your life when it's fizzy water. Is there anything more confronting? You think that there's a— the 2 seconds when you sip that, that you think you're getting poisoned because you have no idea. It shocks you. You're not expecting bubbles, and especially when they're the little bubbles, so they trick you. That, that got me yesterday where I nearly had a heart attack.

Tommy: Well, I'd be, I'd be happy. I mean, the only problem, I, I wouldn't find it such a trap if I was drinking water, but I once opened up a, a Nippy's milk. I don't know if that's an Australian brand, you know, Nippy's, just a little box. It's like a, yeah, like strawberry chocolate. Yeah, I had a, I had a coffee flavoured one. I took one sip of it and it was fizzy. So if milk's fizzy then you're done.

Josh: Why was it fizzy?

Tommy: It was off milk. It was, it was completely off. It was fizzing in my mouth because that's how often it was disgusting.

Josh: And so yeah, that is an issue. That is the whole fizzy water thing is a massive life trap. And it's extending now beyond that, which is also so many of these waters now are doing different flavors. So you think you're getting a normal, like you're getting a green bottle and you just think it's a bit A quirky brand. He's trying to do something different with water and it's got lime in it.

Tommy: What I love when I'm travelling is seeing how wrong Melbourne have got something and what you could actually bring home. You know what, like I always think, why don't they just send out some people around the world to find the best of the best and then we just implement that and you have utopia.

Josh: It sounds like almost a TV show idea.

Tommy: Best of the best. Yeah, but why not? So what, like, I know in Tel Aviv, like, the beaches had the best showers, water bottle refills. It was like crazy. It was like state-of-the-art. But what, like, how does a country like Australia not have that? So keep an eye out, Josh.

Josh: Well, interestingly, um, I did some work with some farmers, like, in the agricultural industry, um, a few months ago, and they were talking about they go to places like Israel for irrigation research. Apparently, they're really good with irrigation. So, they do send over groups of people, but they're not doing it at the level that is different types of water or Coca-Cola flavours. Fun fact about that, the reason that M&M peanut butter— peanut butter M&Ms aren't in Australia is because one of the ingredients that are in the formula is actually banned in Australia. So, they're reformulating it, but it's not their top priority. They actually have a few other flavours that they're working on, including, I believe, like an Oreo or cookie flavour.

Tommy: Oh, yeah.

Josh: Cookie and cream flavour, which I heard from my mate at Mars. So, that's exciting times.

Tommy: Have you got into any of the Ferrero products in Italy? Because in the supermarkets, the mini supermarkets, there's like—

Josh: Like the Buono or whatever.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah. But there's like even like these little cake things. Nutella?

Josh: Nah, I haven't. We haven't been doing much of the grocery stuff. We, um, I just had— I've been eating, I've been like meal replacing sometimes with gelati, which has been amazing.

Tommy: But, um, that's what you do when you're in Italy.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: But can you— because this, this is the shit that gets me going— can you take a photo of any weird— can you buy something weird from a supermarket that is very much the opposite of what they sell in Australia? And post it and eat it. Just do a little review.

Josh: Okay, well, it's not going to be as bad as, I think, was it, man, there was some stuff, tahor, I think, in, I had some stuff in the Philippines which was pretty, it wasn't my cup of tea. There was one thing which was like an egg, which is like got the little fucking bird in it, which was horrendous. I couldn't eat that. And then there's another one I think was called tahor, because there's a guy who walks along the streets, um, yelling it in the morning, and it's some sort of like soy drink. And obviously I don't drink soy and can't stand the stuff, but I, I did try it. It was— it wasn't that great. Um, hey, before, before we go, I've got a marketing idea for the Daily Talk Show. Wanted to run by you. Want to run?

Tommy: Always up for that. Do you want feedback on your segment?

Josh: No thanks. Oh, you know, not from you, not from you, but hi@thedailytalkshow.com if you've got any life trappings, life traps. I may have used the two that I'd written down already.

Tommy: That was my only feedback. Just be careful of threading three into one.

Josh: Yeah, it could have been. Yeah, the fizzy water one, that was its own Trello card. I wrote fizzy poison. Um, but I need to move some of the stuff across because I already spoke about no chicken salt and my tinted moisturiser and my fudge shop story.

Tommy: Now we're doing a debrief of our podcast. Yeah, happening.

Josh: This is the, this is the admin section, guys, because we're talking about getting close. This is the boardroom. Um, uh, we're talking marketing for the Daily Talk Show, and I was thinking about how, how can we, um How can we do something that's got cut through, that's not what everyone else is doing? I was sitting on the canals yesterday and my, um, I was— had my water bottle and I was really worried that I was going to drop it in there and then people were going to shame me for being illiterate. And in the moment I was like, oh, I started thinking about messages in a bottle. Then it got me thinking, I'm like What a bit. Yeah, good reference. Um, I don't, don't know that. So what's— how does that go?

Tommy: I'm a genie in a bottle, baby. Come, come on, let me out.

Josh: Please stop. The, um, so no, Message in a Bottle, different to Genie in a Bottle. Uh, how about that as a tactic for the daily talk show? You and I could get a bunch of glass bottles, put our URL or like a small note asking them to listen to the Daily Talk Show and even give us a review on iTunes or the podcast Apple app and see what sort of cut through. What do you think? First impressions?

Tommy: Yeah, look, I think there's probably not enough value. I think we offer a value— a valued show, our show is valuable, but probably for someone who's just walking along the beach and seen a bottle, it probably needs an incentive, an activation code, or go to this website, thedailytalkshow.com/messageinabottle, and there they can claim a prize.

Josh: It feels too brand activation-y. I think that it needs to be something where they feel like man, this feels like a sign. I found— because if you found a water— if you found a bottle and it had a message in it, I feel like if it said you're going to be very wealthy soon, you'd absolutely be like, fuck, this is the world telling me this. So I feel like we have the attention of our audience, so I think that we could just say to them, you should— you need this in your life, with a, with a link.

Tommy: Look, I'm willing to, um, I'm willing to get involved.

Josh: Are you willing to do it all for me?

Tommy: It's a 5-year strategy because it might not actually come back until 5 years later.

Josh: But what I wasn't sure on was the environmental impact. Is it not okay nowadays to do the whole message in the bottle because of the environment?

Tommy: I think it— yeah, well I'm sure you would have people getting upset about it.

Josh: Yeah, yeah, okay.

Tommy: Yeah, I mean, it depends if you want to go down the route. It's, uh, it's not a plus, so it's okay.

Josh: Oh, that's okay. Yeah, that's right, we won't do it.

Tommy: Although I would like to see you do it in Venice.

Josh: I've cracked it, I've cracked it. I'm not doing it. I'll just fucking do Facebook ads.

Tommy: Yeah, probably you're probably going to get a few more results.

Josh: We don't know. I think, I think the message in the bottle thing would be really powerful.

Tommy: Well, look, if you support Josh's message in the bottle, hi@thedailytalkshow.com.

Josh: Or if you don't live near a beach, if you live near somewhere that you could— if we, if we gave you the tools, i.e., a bottle and a message, if you would be a willing participant You're near a beach or near some form of water. Preferably, it should be attached to an ocean because a lake would be quite boring, I would assume.

Tommy: You're outsourcing your litter. You've just outsourced.

Josh: It does seem like this big conspiracy theory, doesn't it?

Tommy: Oh, that's hilarious.

Josh: It's all fine. Alright.

Tommy: No, but help us get the message out there. Maybe not in a bottle. Hit like, subscribe to the podcast. It helps.

Josh: Yeah, I don't know if there's anyone listening that's not subscribing, do you think? Especially these episodes, and it's not like we're leveraging names.

Tommy: Are you subscribed to our podcast? Yeah, I thought he might have not been, but he is. So that, uh, that was a fun—

Josh: that was nice. Um, well, hopefully— I want to say it up front, my, um, I sound like shit at the moment, which must be driving people insane.

Tommy: You sound better than when you started. No, you sound better than when you first started.

Josh: Oh, great. But yeah, I'm— Am I in Venice tomorrow? Yes, I'll be in Venice tomorrow. So, we'll be doing it live again from me being in Venice, and then I'll be off to Florence. So, from Monday, I'll be in Florence, and then on Friday we'll have a guest episode. I haven't worked out which guest. Oh, yeah.

Tommy: I actually was thinking that.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: Who have we got on? We'll work that out by tomorrow.

Josh: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. It's the Daily Talk Show, everyone. Please send us your emails if you are listening. We love hearing from you, what you're liking, what you're hating, whether you do live near a beach. Don't even— you don't even have to be willing to do the, uh, the bottle bit yet. We can, we can talk numbers, we can, we can work it out, but we just need people who are near waterways. Let's, let's, let's say that, waterways. If you are near a waterway, please be in contact, and maybe we can send you some stickers. We're saying to get some, uh, Instagrams of people sending through stickers to Russell, Sean. They've received their stickers. If you do receive them and you've put them on something interesting, send us an email as well. Anything else, TJ, before we go?

Tommy: No, that's about it.

Josh: All right, okay, well, all right guys, have a good one.

Tommy: See you guys.