Chicken Foot

Josh: It's a very low barrier to get into the Gronkh Squad. That's crazy!

Tommy: We've committed to do the Daily Talk Show for 10 years.

Josh: Hi guys! Hi guys!

Tommy: Put it in the calendar. I just like to cheque the temperature in the room. I told you my squeegee story.

Josh: It is outrageous.

Tommy: Come on, let's go. It's the Daily Talk Show episode 1004.

Josh: It's Fat Friday. How are we, everybody?

Tommy: I'm good. Thank you for asking. Just before we had some schnitzel rolls, it's burgers.

Josh: You are the sum of the 5 people you hang around, and you're also the schnitzel of the 5 people you hang around.

Tommy: I saw actually a bit of a criticism of Scott Galloway, who is the guy who wrote The Four, you know, the book that's all about Amazon and Apple and I've heard of his name.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: And he did a tweet.

Josh: As in the Big Four?

Tommy: The big— as in the four— the Big Four companies.

Josh: The Big Four, not the Big Four holiday park you go with your fam.

Tommy: Is that a thing?

Josh: Yeah, mate.

Tommy: Is that Five Flags?

Josh: Famous for their inflatable sort of big pillow that you can jump on. I went to Big Four by myself.

Tommy: In what country?

Josh: Australia.

Tommy: Okay.

Josh: Anyway, the Big Four tech companies. Yeah.

Tommy: So he's got some great— he's got a podcast. Called The Prof G Show. And he said—

Josh: Is he a professor?

Tommy: Yes, he is. He is actually. Great.

Josh: I mean, you'd be an absolute poser to call yourself the professor. You know what? Actually, I take that back. Who is? The Professor, who is this trick basketball player on YouTube. Dude, he just goes to basketball courts and just smashes most people, but he can like dribble through people's legs and like fakes and he's really good. Anyway, he's called The Professor. I think the cough.

Tommy: Can he make a free throw?

Josh: Dude, he's a freak. Anyway.

Tommy: Do you tell me about the cough? Yeah. So, what, so people cracked it about this. So, he did a tweet saying, you constantly want to be upgrading your peer group. You want to hang out with smarter, more successful, more interesting, higher character people because you will rise or fall to the level of your peer group. Oh, he's— that's what he said. Hashtag Prof G Pod, hashtag office hours. And, um, people cracked it.

Josh: Sorry, what's hashtag office hours?

Tommy: I think it's just, uh, you know, people open office hours, or like office hours where it's like you can ask me a question sort of thing. Really? Yeah.

Josh: Oh, hashtag office hours.

Tommy: Yeah. Anyway, so, um, some people have, um, Cracked it. One guy, which I like—

Josh: Yeah, great.

Tommy: One Twitter account says, you're right, sorry Scott, I need to cancel our dinner this weekend. Which is good. Someone else said, uh, Peter Moloch, president CEO of Creative Planning, whatever that is, looks like some sort of VC fund. He says, or you can hang— Sorry, or you can hang out with people you love and respect. Friends aren't cars. I'm a fan, but this is a terrible take. I can't imagine choosing friends based on how smart or successful they are.

Josh: Yeah, it's pretty robotic to be thinking that. Like, if— I think you can understand if you have some sort of dead weights, dead weight mates that— But like, for instance, there's people you grow up with. It's really hard. Like, if you grew up with— If you had some tight friendships growing up, and you've kind of distanced yourself slightly, but they might not think that. Like, I know one person, for instance, that's over the years acted like it's old days. Just like, oh, God. And then the type of person they might be might not be someone— It feels all harsh. This is the thing. This is what these people who are thinking about this are going into and then thinking, but old mate Timmy is finding it pretty hard to live and he's just getting by and I'm one of his good mates.

Tommy: And so, the thing is, do you feel like they have to— be the old version? Absolutely not. So you don't feel like you need to share a bong if you ask?

Josh: No, I would not share a bong with him.

Tommy: Absolutely not during COVID Definitely. Clean your bong, clean it out. Um, bongs are pretty disgusting. I've never had a bong, but I just like the— when I see it in film and television, dude, it's, it's, uh, it doesn't look good.

Josh: I mean, if you're still doing bongs You think a bong's out of fashion? Most pot smokers, uh, I think get to a point where they're like, no more bongs.

Tommy: Really?

Josh: No more bongs. Like, I even said no more bongs and I was 15. So no, maybe like, I reckon I had my last bong when I was like 16 or 17, and then I was done because I'm like, what they do to me After one is too much.

Tommy: And so, the idea is that the marijuana goes at the bottom in like a little—

Josh: Goes in a cone piece out of the—

Tommy: Do we need to do a bong? And then you light it or whatever.

Josh: Yeah, I'll get my bong. Hang on.

Tommy: Is this guy—

Josh: This is a part of Fat Friday, but we'll get to this. This is something we're having for Fat Friday. But picture this is your plastic bottle.

Tommy: What is that? Milky something.

Josh: Picture this is your plastic bottle and you have a pipe that sticks into the side of it and you have a cone piece and that's where the marijuana goes.

Tommy: And then where do you light it?

Josh: And so, the pipe goes down into the water. There's half the water in the bottle and you light it at the cone piece.

Tommy: And so, the idea is that the flame— What's the—

Josh: People know what I'm doing.

Tommy: What is that? Like trying to get it down? I don't know.

Josh: It's just— Anyway. There comes a time where people stop doing bongs. But then there's some people that are pushing through and maybe they love it. And you can do what you want.

Tommy: It seems like a bit of a subculture, I guess.

Josh: It's definitely a less— If we're talking status and we're talking sort of, you know, the people you're hanging around, the bong community is a different vibe, I think.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: Maybe it's different in Los Angeles where it's legal and It's, you know, maybe it changed the way people saw these apparatuses. They don't even sell them. You can't buy them here as bongs anymore in Australia. They're like pot plant. Yeah, one rose in your bong. Anyway, no good. Don't smoke bongs.

Tommy: So, Fat Fridays, you've got some sort of purpley looking drink.

Josh: Oh, yeah. So, today the theme for Fat Friday is What is it?

Tommy: Asthma.

Josh: Is it? Who's going to have an asthma attack first?

Tommy: So, you've got some purple Fanta.

Josh: Purple Fanta, a purple milky drink and a purple marshmallow scented. Purple in the middle.

Tommy: So, the only one that doesn't interest me at all is the milk.

Josh: Yeah, I knew you wouldn't like that.

Tommy: Is it actually dairy?

Josh: I have no idea. This is from the Thai supermarket across the road. It says—

Tommy: You can get Coke No Sugar from there, by the way.

Josh: It says Mikkew. M-I-K-K-E-W. I'm sure that's not how you say it. Look, to be honest, I can't read Thai.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: So, I'm going to give you the Fanta. Can you have that?

Tommy: Kap khun khrap.

Josh: No problem. And I'm going to try this because it looks like it's meant to be milk.

Tommy: Okay.

Josh: Um, oh, it is.

Tommy: So it smells nice. It's Berry Fanta.

Josh: Oh, hang on.

Tommy: Here we go. You ready? Wow.

Josh: Holy moly. Can you please try? It's not milky milk. It's like—

Tommy: Imagine that first before—

Josh: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Imagine like nectar. Imagine not even nectar. Imagine like a fruit that goes In a milky looking.

Tommy: Oh, that was disgusting. Seeing a bubble form on the top of the whole thing.

Josh: Just have a hover.

Tommy: I can't hover. I'm not hovering.

Josh: All right.

Tommy: Let me just say, let me just. I've got a straw, actually.

Josh: Okay. I don't know.

Tommy: That's good.

Josh: Go, go, go. Come on, make it in. It's just so sweet. It's almost like jelly.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: Before you've set it. Like, that's sweet.

Tommy: It's very, yeah, it has a sort of a thick consistency. Yeah. Let me just try the can.

Josh: I mean, this is probably a delicacy in Thailand. What's that? What is that? What have you— What's the Fanta like?

Tommy: Purple Zappos in a can. Wow.

Josh: Let me try it.

Tommy: Okay, hang on.

Josh: It's crazy what they put in drinks, isn't it? Sorry, I just threw my keys.

Tommy: Slide it over. It's got like some funky taste though, too.

Josh: Yeah. Asthma attack. All right, here we go.

Tommy: Wow, they're very similar though.

Josh: How crazy it tastes, dude. Taste buds, taste buds, just tasting. My brother knew a girl who couldn't taste.

Tommy: Really?

Josh: Lost sense of taste.

Tommy: Weird flakes?

Josh: No, it wasn't even— it's like a— it's— it can be a bit fucked up. Um, oh, look at these.

Tommy: Wonder what you eat, these little clouds.

Josh: Look at these little clouds.

Tommy: Okay, so these are the, um, Um, uh, marshmallows. Let's have a look. Let's push them down. I think I could get around the marshmallows, don't you think?

Josh: Oh, look at it. You open it up and inside—

Tommy: Oh, yuck! Oh my God, that looked revolting. So the, the nice sort of pink purple packaging, but it almost looks like a bug has eaten its way through the marshmallow. God, I'm not gonna bite it. I'm not going to reveal the inside to me.

Josh: It looks like something off Dr. Pimple Popper. Yeah, have you seen that Instagram page? Yeah, I mean, they're just— it's definitely not as sickening as the other, the other flavors. Um, anyway, back to Scott Galloway.

Tommy: Yeah, friends, it's, uh, the, the work thing.

Josh: The reason you brought it up was because We, we spend a lot of time in this office, a lot of time around the 4 people within this business. I mean, there's 4 of us, so it's like, uh, we've run out of our— how many more we got each? We've got 2 more outside of the 3 others in the building. And so we, we— I walked up to the, the chicken section in the deli in Safeway. Yeah. And I said, um, could I have a schnitzel, thanks? And I fucking didn't mean to.

Tommy: That's fine, you didn't say schnitzel.

Josh: No, I said schnitzel.

Tommy: No, that's fine.

Josh: Schnitzel.

Tommy: Jess says schnitzel.

Josh: But I butchered it.

Tommy: E-E-Y. How do you normally say it?

Josh: Snitchel.

Tommy: Is that how you normally say it?

Josh: Chicken snitchel. I fucking hate it. Hang on, I don't even know how to say it anymore.

Tommy: So this is the problem.

Josh: See, but George did the same thing.

Tommy: How do you say it?

Josh: Can I have a chicken schnitzel? I think.

Tommy: Yeah, how do you say it? Schnitzel.

Josh: Chicken schnitzel. There you go.

Tommy: See, Jess says schnitzel, and so we've been joking about it, and now we've actually been saying schnitzel. But this is what happens. Schnitzel.

Josh: I've got to cut Jess.

Tommy: Schnitzel.

Josh: Galloway wouldn't be happy.

Tommy: Yeah, you need to upgrade your peer group, Matthew.

Josh: No, but we put a just— there's one thing I won't stoop to. And I will not stoop as low as Jess when it comes to pranks. Her pranks, actually. No, I did stoop as low as her. A lot of chicken. The theme of this business this week is chicken. Yeah, schnitzel.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: Can we talk about the chicken foot?

Tommy: Yeah. Yeah. Well, so I'm working on a project at the moment. Just the stress of getting it all done. I do like a lot of the stuff that we do day to day is a lot of real people in their workplaces, in real life situations. And so, product stuff, whilst we do a good job of it, at the end of the day, it's a little bit more stressful because there's more moving parts. And one of them is you need to organise hand models for holding devices or whatever it is that you're filming.

Josh: Yeah, because you can't use these boots. Exactly.

Tommy: You can't use my toe thumbs. So, anyway.

Josh: My thumbs, my hairy hands. Yeah.

Tommy: So, I was working on that. I was trying to work out who I could get as a hand model.

Josh: Yep.

Tommy: And Jess says to me, she was in the kitchen, she said, hey, did you end up sorting out the hand model? And I said, oh no. She said, I've actually got one for you. And then she came over to me and hit me in the face with a foot from a chicken, a raw chicken foot. And I did— I didn't know how to react.

Josh: Did you know what it was as soon as you saw it?

Tommy: Oh, Yeah, I just, yeah, it just, it didn't look, didn't look great. And so I, I just sort of reacted as you would.

Josh: I heard from downstairs. I was coming up the stairs and I thought something bad had happened. I thought the NAS had been taken over again.

Tommy: Ah, that would be so annoying, wouldn't it? But it's like hearing when 3D Dill cut off half his thumb. Yeah. In the kitchen.

Josh: Yeah. A real, a real incident. Yeah. This was just a dead chicken foot.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: And so anyway, 15 cents from—

Tommy: Yeah, exactly, from the supermarket. So anyway, we—

Josh: Safeway, whatever it's fucking Woolworths. Yeah, why change the name? Safeway was great. Did they get acquired or something?

Tommy: I don't know. It's Countdown in, uh, New Zealand. Yeah, yeah, yeah, New Zealand.

Josh: Um, can buy beer at Countdown. Interesting. Like the one of the— So a lot of them have Liquorland.

Tommy: Do you not do that?

Josh: No, a lot of them got Liquorland connected to the Woolworths, but in New Zealand one of the aisles is an alcohol aisle inside of the Countdown.

Tommy: Oh, he does, has that?

Josh: Yeah, section. Why can't the others do it? I reckon they're a part of Liquorland. Something's going on there.

Tommy: I think the same company. Yeah. So I guess they probably just want to have like a separate— it's probably a good way of sort of separating out the businesses potentially.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: But when we were on a shoot yesterday, that did the foot thing came up when you and I were going to get coffees and we saw a butcher. And so, we actually went to the butcher and asked if they had any chicken feet, because what we were planning on doing was taking the chicken feet because, you know, Jess had pranked me with it.

Josh: Yeah.

Tommy: And put the chicken feet or foot, maybe just one, I think would have done the trick.

Josh: One's enough.

Tommy: Chicken foot into her bag during the shoot. Her handbag.

Josh: And so, when she went—

Tommy: go to her handbag, she would find a chicken foot.

Josh: I'm glad it didn't pan out because turns out they didn't sell chicken feet at this establishment.

Tommy: And George, I was talking to George about it this morning about what we were going to do. And he's our, the moral compass of the business. Yeah.

Josh: Yeah. I couldn't imagine him getting— He could get caught up with us.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: But I think if you, if we asked him.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: I think he'd give us his true opinion.

Tommy: And so, I said to him, oh, this is what Tommy and I were going to do. He's like, oh, yeah, I'm glad you didn't. Well, maybe it's like a little bit more mean than what Jess did.

Josh: Well, inside of his handbag, like, like not in plastic, like if it was just—

Tommy: Which is what we're going to do.

Josh: But if you're up for pranking people, you're going to be up for being pranked, I think.

Tommy: And also, the other thing too is Pranking is, you know, as they say in the finance industry, it's like compound interest.

Josh: What is it?

Tommy: You need to— the prank needs to get bigger and bigger as you go, right? Like, it's sort of—

Josh: Wow.

Tommy: Don't you agree?

Josh: Well, it's getting back.

Tommy: But the idea— If you prank someone with less than what was pranked, it doesn't cancel it out.

Josh: It doesn't.

Tommy: The aim of the game is to cancel it out. And so, we didn't do that, but you— had an idea when we discovered a smell in the office.

Josh: Well, I was downstairs and I hear someone talking about, maybe Bray said, is there a smell in the bin? And then all of a sudden, I'm getting blamed for Jess's chicken foot because I put it into the bin. Like, I wrapped it up and put it into the bin. And I just thought it was a bit rich, to be honest, getting blamed for the smell of the chicken foot that she bought. I said to her—

Tommy: 17 cents.

Josh: I said to her, I said to her, This is like you've walked into a village with somebody that you just killed and you've dumped them on the floor, said, there's my victim. And then I was like, oh, I guess I should put that over there.

Tommy: It's a weird analogy.

Josh: And then the whole town gets sick from this dead carcass, and then I'm blamed for the sickness of the town. Okay. You know, that's how I felt.

Tommy: Okay.

Josh: It was mediaeval shit.

Tommy: All right. And so, um, anyway, You had the great idea, Jess and Bri were going to get coffee. Jess's car is currently out the front rather than in the garage because we've been using the garage for some stuff. And so, anyway, we never get parking fines out the front. It's good. But it's always a risk.

Josh: And so— I mean, Tully got her car towed from the end of the street. Yeah. But she didn't—

Tommy: Not her own car either.

Josh: Even worse.

Tommy: A mate's car.

Josh: Your mate's car got towed.

Tommy: A Rangey, wasn't it?

Josh: Which isn't as bad as a parking fine, I don't think.

Tommy: Are you kidding?

Josh: No, no, no. Getting your car towed. Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Isn't as bad as a speeding fine in your mate's car.

Tommy: Okay.

Josh: Because speeding fine takes time to get there. You go and pay to get your car out of the tow. Parking fine is much better.

Tommy: Having the car impounded and removed from where you left it is not nice.

Josh: The most annoying. But in terms of points, you can, you can do it without your mate knowing. So, if you take your friend's car out and get a parking fine, you don't have to tell them because you've got the parking fine, you pay it. Speeding fine, it goes, they have to declare who's fucking— Like there's—

Tommy: Well, so a parking fine is better. Parking fine is better than getting your car towed.

Josh: Absolutely. Getting car towed is the pits. It's the top of the less annoying ones for your friend is what I'm saying.

Tommy: Yeah. I've nearly had my car— I got like a— I parked in a keep clear, just got a big fine.

Josh: Be fine.

Tommy: Yeah. Rather than towed, which I appreciated, actually. I was like, you know what? That is a better outcome. Yeah. Even if it was a little bit cheaper to pick up the car. Yeah. Just the idea of it feels quite intrusive to think that your car's been picked up by a truck and removed.

Josh: There's nothing like seeing a tow truck driving along and just in the back of this car is just going, "Whee-oo, whee-oo, whee-oo, whee-oo." Oh, yeah. Because all the alarms are going off. Anyway. Anyway. So, Jesse's car's down on the street. And I had the great idea that we should put a fake parking fine on her car. As a kid, I actually bought from the one of those Just Right, what are they like? Southland. What's New. Had like a booklet of fake parking fines and I put them in my street.

Tommy: It's such a cheap and easy hack, really.

Josh: It is.

Tommy: Right. And anyway, so, it wasn't just the parking fine. You decided to have the paper, but inside the paper, it was sort of folded up, was the chicken foot.

Josh: The old rotten chicken foot.

Tommy: The joke is sort of on you because you're sort of laughing with a, "Haha," getting back at her. And I sort of said to George, I'm like, "Isn't Tommy sort of losing because he has to— He's gone through the bin." No, that's all right. To get the—

Josh: This is what you got to go above and beyond. If I go and get a clean chicken foot, I'd have no problem having a clean chicken foot.

Tommy: And so, you got the rotten chicken foot wrapped up.

Josh: Which I didn't touch it. The bin was actually clean.

Tommy: But you used the Stanley knife?

Josh: Yeah, clean that.

Tommy: Is that gonna— Okay.

Josh: Cleaned it. Cleaned it just to cut the bag open.

Tommy: But anyway. Did it get the reaction you hoped for?

Josh: Not what I wanted. I couldn't— Like, Jess, if you're listening, come down. I'd like to get your thoughts. But I don't know because she kind of reacted and then she saw it and gave a little scream, but she is jumpy, Jess. Like, as she— as she— and then she went and put it in the bin, but she did have a reaction. And then she came up the stairs and I clucked at her like a chicken as she walked in, and she shat herself. So it's kind of— it all evened out. We're even, Jess. No more jokes, please.

Tommy: Yeah, no more pranks. Yeah, I mean, yeah, prank. I was saying, um, to our mate Mick, I was like, you don't see as many pranks Nah, pranking random people is shit. Well, the YouTuber sort of pranking things bad, but just pranking amongst your mates.

Josh: Surely there's a time that it's like bongs. They stop at some point.

Tommy: Yeah. But no, but there's definitely a pranking sort of community. I like the idea of pranking, but there is the risk of just pissing people off. Like if people are on edge, Pranking is not the nicest feeling, is it?

Josh: Yeah. Yeah.

Tommy: Like, so the pranks around like, oh, you got a parking fine or like the person at the other end doesn't feel good.

Josh: No, I know what you mean.

Tommy: You're going to tip water on Jess's head with a bucket.

Josh: That was a joke. I would never do that. That'd be so annoying. And she loves her clothes, fashion, and that would fuck her up. But no, I don't think— Or it's better to prank people when they're good.

Tommy: You know, good mentally.

Josh: Yeah, you don't want to prank her, um, when she's at a 30. Well, you don't— what do you mean?

Tommy: 30 out of 100.

Josh: Oh, when she's at a 30.

Tommy: Yeah.

Josh: Okay, is that what she's at today?

Tommy: She was at 40 yesterday, so we don't know.

Josh: I mean, but the hard bit about pranking— I thought she seemed good today. Yeah, so I'll prank her. Just do your analysis. If they seem over a 60, prank it.

Tommy: Yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah, I mean, there is— I think I've got asthma. I don't know, purple, it's so annoying, isn't it? Um, I don't mind a bit of pranking. Uh, anyway, that's the prank show.

Josh: That's been The Daily Talk Show. Yeah.

Tommy: Uh, if you want to send us an email, hi@thedailytalkshow.com. If you have any ideas of what we should be doing for Fat Friday—

Josh: Yeah, like a giant-sized gummy bear. I wouldn't mind one of those. Or if you've seen something that you're like, that's messed up, I wouldn't try that, but I know the guys would. Send that.

Tommy: Yeah, there's got to be. I mean, there's definitely the, um, you know, you hear about like the 1 kilo burritos or the 1 kilo this or the 1 kilo.

Josh: There was one at, um, Mad Max years ago, smashed it, got a t-shirt, didn't want the t-shirt. Yeah, there's nothing more annoying than when you do something and then you get something you don't want.

Tommy: Yeah, well, it's more for the, for the gloating, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, not for the bloating. Uh, anyway, enjoy the rest of your Friday, guys. See you Monday.

Josh: See you guys.